this post was submitted on 15 Mar 2025
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Millions of Americans across the country are on alert for a severe weather outbreak with violent, long-track tornadoes with damaging winds of up to 80 mph and large hail.

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[–] Allonzee@lemmy.world 79 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

My condolences to the harm reduction blue voters, but did anyone else's ears just start ringing with the screams of millions of southern state Republican hypocrites, willfully oblivious to the staggering irony, demanding GOVERNMENTAL ASSISTANCE disaster aid for this UNREGULATED CAPITALIST CAUSED CLIMATE CHANGE once preventable tragedy? "

And I want them to get that aid too. That's what separates us from their barbarism. I for one want them to have universal healthcare and access to education, as we'd all benefit from them being less ignorant, whereas they would very much prefer those outside their out group be dead. Of course they'd turn on each other then.

[–] masterofn001@lemmy.ca 54 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If only there was an agency that could predict this kind of catastrophic weather, and another to aid in recovery, and another to regulate against unfettered destructive capitalism. If only.

The hands of many are covered in blood.

But they will never be blamed. The AM radio/Russian/conservative hate machine propaganda is too strong.

[–] AbidanYre@lemmy.world 18 points 1 year ago (2 children)

How could Kamala Clinton do this to us?

[–] meco03211@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

Won't they think of the buttery males!

[–] CharlesDarwin@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

What's bizarre is that I see both the right AND the left doing this kind of thing when it comes to blaming Democrats....

Sigh.

[–] einlander@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Well Fema was shrunk and I bet they will be blamed for living there.

[–] Ioughttamow@fedia.io 16 points 1 year ago

I’m sure they’re all democrat crisis actors

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

How can you not blame them for living there? The first settlers were warned not to build there (the native Americans were smart enough to be nomads), and this is not the first time American cardboard houses were blown around the country in that area.

[–] RymrgandsDaughter@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

You're better than me I don't want them to have it, they can bootstrap their way to Jesus or something

[–] Alteon@lemmy.world 54 points 1 year ago (3 children)

This is God punishing MAGA voters. /s

Just kidding.... There is no God. This is a man-made disaster caused by climate change, and these sorts of disasters will only get worse until we start fixing our carbon issue.

[–] My_IFAKs___gone@lemmy.world 18 points 1 year ago

When your god is the second law of thermodynamics and your religion is capitalism and your pastime is arrogant ignorance, what you initially said holds up pretty well.

[–] FabledAepitaph@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

I made this joke last night to a friend. Why haven't the MAGA freaks stopped for one second to think that maybe God sent the severe weather after them for voting in Trump and his entourage of assholes?

I guess they just don't think, is the problem--lol.

[–] painfulasterisk1@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 year ago

Is elmud hacking HAARP. If he kills civilians, there's no need to pay social security

[–] ryan213@lemmy.ca 36 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Those people need to pray harder.

[–] badbrainstorm@lemmy.world 20 points 1 year ago

MTG said it was the government controlling the weather. So this ones on Trump

[–] meco03211@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I've heard it's god's wrath for homosexuality.

[–] ryan213@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 year ago

That's only for blue states though.

[–] baggins@lemmy.ca 23 points 1 year ago

Thanks Trump!

[–] CobraChicken3000@lemmy.ca 21 points 1 year ago

They still have the capability to report on these things?

[–] Manifish_Destiny@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago

This is clearly Biden's fault

[–] ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I was recently talking to my boss about some storms that were coming through. I said there were tornado watches in place. He said "Yeah but how common are tornadoes in ohio?". I replied "I've driven through two in the past 3 years."

I think he finally understood climate change meant weather change.

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Have they tried fighting tornados with nukes?

[–] Tja@programming.dev 6 points 1 year ago

They have. Now they are using a more advanced sharpie technology.

[–] SinningStromgald@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I'm sure Trump will ~~make lots of money for his friends in construction~~ prioritize helping ~~the rich white people~~ everyone impacted by the storm.

Autocorrect is a real bitch today.

[–] sharkfucker420@lemmy.ml 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

My girlfriends car got totalled by hail last night and my windshield is fucked. Woke up to what sounded like Armageddon at 3 am

[–] eugenevdebs@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

A spokesman for Trump's admin was quoted saying:

I can't believe that the democrats would use their Jewish space lasers on the hardworking electoral college land plots like this. Because of this, we need to defund the weather agencies and FEMA to prevent this, and divert the funding to the Space Agency to shoot the lasers down!

[–] CeeBee_Eh@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Please tell me that's satire. I honestly can't tell at this point.

[–] eugenevdebs@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 1 year ago

I completely made it up as a joke, so satire.

I genuinely didn't think it would fool anyone, sorry about that.

[–] werefreeatlast@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

Its Yemen! We must attack!

[–] NotMyOldRedditName@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I don't know if outbreak is the legit term for that, but I find it hilarious thinking they are spreading like a disease. How soon until the outbreak spreads across more state lines!

[–] Ensign_Crab@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Wait... Bealls is still a thing?

[–] Ledericas@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago

weather machine , or STORM from x-men.

[–] MuskyMelon@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Wonder how much of FEMA is left to help them or is it just pull yourself out of the rubble of your own house you slackers time?