this post was submitted on 20 Sep 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] nutbutter@discuss.tchncs.de 130 points 5 days ago (12 children)

400 emails per week is CRAZY

[–] inmate_p01135809@lemmy.world 63 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] WhiteOakBayou@lemmy.world 22 points 5 days ago (10 children)

Are you being facetious or do you actually have to interact with greater then 80 emails a day?

[–] floquant@lemmy.dbzer0.com 29 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Some jobs really are email operator in a trenchcoat

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[–] NewNewAccount@lemmy.world 12 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I send like two emails per day and it’s exhausting.

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[–] inmate_p01135809@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago

I stripped nearly all spam/unnecessary emails out and still get around 120 or so per day, about 100 of those work emails. I need to respond to maybe 10-20 emails a day, but I also get daily reports I have to read, project emails, support emails, emails from my kid's school, medical, financial...

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[–] black0ut@pawb.social 7 points 4 days ago

I usually receive around 250-400 emails per day. Most of those are from automated systems, tho some of the automated emails still need to be checked out just in case.

"Only" around 100 of the emails I receive in a day are from humans. That still makes it 500 human emails per week.

Needless to say, I don't answer every one of them (they're sent to a shared inbox, and other people can answer them too), but I read most of them.

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[–] affenlehrer@feddit.org 19 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Smart move not to talk about ads during work. That way you can even add them to the premium subscription at any time.

[–] musubibreakfast@lemmy.world 5 points 4 days ago

"Hi, it's me your favorite employee Greg. Ever wonder where I go during my second poop break and why the kitchen smells like fish!? Subscribe to Greg Plus to find out! 14,99 per month or save up 30 dollars when you subscribe for the year at 149,99. Use the code #fuckcapitalism to get an additional 10 percent off!"

[–] Fandangalo@lemmy.world 82 points 5 days ago (6 children)
  • 48k
  • 96k
  • 192k

For those wondering

[–] Hawk@lemmy.dbzer0.com 47 points 5 days ago (12 children)

Are annual salaries a typical US thing? Rarely see this here in Europe.

[–] NateNate60@lemmy.world 29 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (6 children)

Most desk jobs in the US are salaried. Salaries are quoted typically in annual terms, although payroll is processed typically fortnightly (meaning salary payments are transferred into your account every two weeks, usually on Thursday or Wednesday).

The US Bureau of Labour Statistics collects salary data across hundreds of job descriptions and reports this information regularly. Here are some median annual salaries (along with the monthly equivalent in euros) for various corporate jobs:

  • Human Resources Specialists: $75,940 (€5,500 monthly)
  • Buyers and Purchasing Agents: $77,710 (€5,630 monthly)
  • Budget Analysts: $91,640 (€6,640 monthly)
  • Market Research Analysts and Marketing Specialists: $78,760 (€5,710)
  • Paralegals and Legal Assistants: $62,890 (€4,560)
  • Lawyers: $159,670 (€11,580)
  • Securities, Commodities, and Financial Service Sales Agents: $78,660 (€5,700)
  • Real Estate Brokers: $73,220 (€5,810)
  • Billing and Posting Clerks: $48,500 (€3,520)
  • Secretaries and Administrative Assistants: $47,540 (€3,450)
  • Computer Systems Analysts: $105,850 (€7,670)
  • Network and Computer Systems Administrator: $99,130 (€7,190)
  • Software Developers: $135,980 (€9,860)

Some notes before comparing salaries:

  • Office workers work 40 hours per week, and lunch breaks are typically 1 hour. The most common working schedule is 09:00 to 17:00 with a 1 hour lunch break. Two weeks paid holiday is the minimum for most office workers, but three to four weeks is more common. Extra paid holiday is considered a bonus for loyalty. People who have worked for the company for a few years will gradually be given more.
  • Sick days in the US are protected by law, but unpaid. Some companies offer paid sick day policies, others do not and force you to use paid holidays if you want to be paid for those days.
  • Increasingly, companies offer 12 paid "floating holidays" per year which are used to cover public holidays. But there are only 11 public holidays leaving one extra to be used however the employee pleases. An employer that doesn't offer floating holidays will instead typically just pay the employee for those 11 public holidays.
  • Tax in the US is typically less than in Europe. A person making $100,000 annually would pay $13,200 in federal tax, and between $0 and about $10,000 in state tax, depending on where they live. The US also offers various tax credits and exemptions. For example, putting money into a retirement account means that the money deposited isn't counted as income.
  • The US, famously, does not have a taxpayer-funded healthcare system. Most office workers have decent to excellent healthcare coverage provided by the employer, and typically the employer pays for the majority of the cost. This ends up costing a few hundred dollars a month to the worker out of pocket for their family, typically.
  • Everyday expenses in the US tend to be cheaper than in Europe due to lower consumption tax. This also varies between US states, with sales tax (comparable to VAT) ranging from 0% to 10%. Sales tax over 10% is uncommon. 7-8% is typical.
  • Energy is cheaper in the US than in Europe. In my area, a gallon of Midgrade 89 gasoline, equivalent to Europe's 95 E10 petrol, costs $4.50 per gallon (€0.96 per litre), which is not far from average in the US. My electricity costs 10.8¢ (8.7 Euro cents) per kWh, but this is considered low nationwide because my municipality owns its own power generation; on average electricity costs around 18¢ per kWh (15 Euro cents).
  • The US is less dense and therefore commute times are longer. Most people drive to work. A commute of around 20-30 km is considered average for most people. A commute of 40 km is not super uncommon, but 50 km and higher is rare.
[–] OwOarchist@pawb.social 18 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Most office workers have decent to excellent healthcare coverage provided by the employer

lol -- they have shitty healthcare coverage provided by the employer, and it's only "decent to excellent" compared to what most other Americans get, which varies between "absolutely terrible" and "just avoid going to the doctor at all".

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[–] W98BSoD@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 5 days ago (3 children)

Most office workers have decent to excellent healthcare coverage provided by the employer, and typically the employer pays for the majority of the cost. This ends up costing a few hundred dollars a month to the worker out of pocket for their family, typically.

Compared to what? Because I still have to pay to see the doctor. And for supplies. And a whole bunch of other stuff that isn’t covered.

And a few hundred a month? Yeah, good luck with that d-tier insurance.

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[–] Darkmuch@lemmy.world 15 points 5 days ago (4 children)

Definitely the most common. Though it is more for showing off how big of a number the salary is. Like the fabled “six figure salary” (100,000+) is a big goal post in many people’s mind. If it’s not salary, we tend to use hourly wage. Though that’s more often for lower amounts

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[–] neidu4@piefed.social 29 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

I actually offer a free tier for eligible corporations: 37.5 hours a week, and no extras. Just sign my ToS.

I will extract and sell your data. All your data.

[–] TheAristocrat@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Was your ToS 30 pages long, strictly legalese, and filled with confusing and questionable addendums?

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[–] solarvector@lemmy.dbzer0.com 61 points 5 days ago

*unlimited email plan will automatically reduce throughput to 1 email/hr when weekly count exceeds 500

[–] ElChinchilla@lemmy.world 16 points 4 days ago

This meme is pretty wildly accurate to my last pay negotiation. (Tried nicely for 1 year, ultimately had to quit for them to take me seriously, don't recommend doing this if you aren't ready and prepared financially.)

I had the 8 hour day package +1% bonus raise 9 hour 1.1% Until emails stop 2%

They opted for the cheapest. People are still confused months later why i stop responding at 3:01 PM.

[–] OwOarchist@pawb.social 48 points 5 days ago (1 children)

That's poop breaks per hour, mind you.

[–] diffaldo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)
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[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 34 points 4 days ago (1 children)

You joke, but you're just describing contractors

[–] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 15 points 4 days ago (3 children)

Kinda, but usually you're sorta expected to put in your best effort for every billed hour regardless.

Instead of laying things out like this, what you can do is bill more hours (within reason) per hour worked to customers who pay less per hour. Gotta be careful with that though.

[–] cRazi_man@europe.pub 15 points 4 days ago (1 children)

usually you're sorta expected to put in your best effort for every billed hour regardless

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[–] StupidBrotherInLaw@lemmy.world 10 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

I worked as a consultant for years and yeah, exactly this, and more! One thing knowledge-based consultants do is reuse old work but bill clients for a flat rate instead of hourly. It's less than paying for new work, but usually much more than the hourly cost if they were billed for just the time required to update the material.

I recycled old work constantly. For a well-paying, reasonable client, I'd sometimes only bill for the time required to update the work and comp the rest as a gift. Last minute, minor updates were free within reason.

Penny pinching, uncooperative clients paid full price and I'd bill the rush rate to the minute for last minute updates. On average, great clients paid less for work than the ones trying to strangle a deal out of me.

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[–] ignotum@lemmy.world 37 points 5 days ago (1 children)

"emails per week: unlimited"

Just forward every employees email to him, he'll handle them all

[–] notabot@piefed.social 15 points 5 days ago

He didn't say anything about dealing with them, that's an optional add-on.

[–] blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 30 points 5 days ago (6 children)

You shit more than three times a day?

[–] Signtist@bookwyr.me 87 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I don't, but my boss doesn't have to know that.

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 30 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Bingo! Poop breaks are code for “freedom time.”

[–] Oth@lemmy.zip 15 points 5 days ago (3 children)

Boss gets a dollar, I get a dime, that's why I poop on company time!

[–] Sausage_Mahoney@lemmy.world 17 points 5 days ago

You get a nickel, boss gets a buck. Steal the catalytic converter From the company truck

[–] W98BSoD@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

The boss makes a dollar
I make a dime
That was a poem
From a simpler time

Now his boss makes 1000
While I make a cent
And he's got employees
That can't make the rent

When the CEO makes a million
And we don't make jack
That's when we riot
To take it all back

Now Mr investor
If this seems extreme
I have to remind you
It beats guillotines

[–] floquant@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 5 days ago

Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime,
That was a poem for a simpler time.
Now boss gets a billion,
While workers get jack
That's why we strike
To get our lives back!

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 20 points 5 days ago (4 children)

You don’t?..

I need to go see a doctor.

[–] blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 5 days ago (2 children)

What if it's one really long shit? Like 24 hours

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 18 points 5 days ago (2 children)
[–] snooggums@piefed.world 15 points 5 days ago

No, that will make a mess!

Gotta sit down.

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[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 21 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (2 children)

I can’t find the artist looking on my phone, if someone knows, please share.

Edit: fixed with the help from @Darkna4231@piefed.blahaj.zone and @wander1236@sh.itjust.works

[–] Darkna4231@piefed.blahaj.zone 36 points 5 days ago (2 children)

It's from @mildnihilist on Instagram/X/Reddit back in like 2022-23? -- someone cropped out the artist's name (why are people like this) DtoCBCNp7LndS2S.png

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[–] wander1236@sh.itjust.works 20 points 5 days ago (1 children)
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Yeah no I'm not putting an SLA on my GI tract. It will break when it wants to

[–] veniasilente@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 5 days ago (2 children)

So, what happens if you do this in an interview, or attach subscription plan offerings to your resume?

Asking for a friend.

[–] bdonvr@thelemmy.club 11 points 5 days ago (1 children)

You get laughed at and told to get out.

Now, if you're an independent contractor you can start doing something like this but formatted a bit more official...

[–] veniasilente@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

So, if more of us start doing it, they'd have to either laugh a lot of people off (at the interview stage, so already pretty deep in nowadays) or eat it and swallow it.

[–] bdonvr@thelemmy.club 2 points 3 days ago

Hell yeah, unfortunately too many people will just accept it. Working class conciousness and solidarity is easier said than built.

[–] finalarbiter@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Generally speaking, there is a little negotiation you can do around salary and benefits when/if you reach that point in an interview. That said, many companies will give you an offer and you can either take it or leave it. Showing up with a 'package' offering like this will get you laughed out of the room.

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