this post was submitted on 25 Feb 2026
512 points (97.8% liked)

Not The Onion

21966 readers
1220 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, ableist, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
 

YouTube thumbnail

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] kescusay@lemmy.world 28 points 4 months ago (1 children)

In the future, please link directly to the article or video as the main link.

[–] isVeryLoud@lemmy.ca 12 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Noted, thank you.

Edit: I flipped them around

[–] kescusay@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago
[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 122 points 4 months ago (3 children)
[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 28 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I am no true king.

You do the math. ;)

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 21 points 4 months ago

Right. You're a potato.

[–] ech@lemmy.ca 18 points 4 months ago (1 children)

A huge piece of shit in almost every respect, but the character had his moments of poignancy.

[–] ToxicWaste@lemmy.cafe 5 points 4 months ago

a POS, but a good politician and he had his principles. not many lanisters could claim that much...

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] FarraigePlaisteach@lemmy.world 93 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

His staff are on record as saying they call him "the cunt" when he's not around. I forget which interview that was but it was a former staff member on a TV interview.

[–] CreativeCider@feddit.org 7 points 4 months ago

Seen it, I think it was an interview with one of the security staff

[–] finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world 58 points 4 months ago (1 children)

"Yes, sir. Flagon of ale for the child rapist, sir. And absolutely nobody has done anything untoward in it, sir".

[–] Akh@lemmy.world 52 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Why does this fucker get royal staff?

[–] ViatorOmnium@piefed.social 36 points 4 months ago

He's still uber rich. Between being mummy's favourite and being the literal shaddy deal's man for the British government for a while, he probably has more money than he would be able to spend.

[–] ApeNo1@lemmy.world 40 points 4 months ago

Here is your beer “Sir” …

[–] brynden_rivers_esq@lemmy.ca 35 points 4 months ago (3 children)

I think we really should stick to calling him “Prince Andrew.” If we don’t we’re letting the monarchy separate itself from him…but that’s bullshit; he has the privilege of being a prince and his status as prince is not just what gave him the liberty to be a monster, but I think we can assume it’s what actually made him a monster.

[–] OCATMBBL@lemmy.world 16 points 4 months ago

The Andrew formerly known as a prince.

[–] gramie@lemmy.ca 6 points 4 months ago (9 children)

I heard a very interesting argument that if the Royal family can remove Andrew from the line of succession, then the line itself can be manipulated, and anyone else could be added. In that case, what is the point of having a royal family?

[–] brynden_rivers_esq@lemmy.ca 5 points 4 months ago

I’m not sure what the point is in any case. Whatever about how the monarch is chosen…having a monarch is bad! And this monarchy is particularly bad!

load more comments (8 replies)
[–] KairuByte@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 4 months ago (17 children)

Eh… I have mixed feelings on that.

Firstly, I don’t think his position made him a monster. I absolutely think it made it easier to become one, but there are plenty of opportunistic pedophiles who aren’t princes. In fact I don’t think it’s a far stretch to say the vast majority aren’t princes

Secondly, correct me if I’m wrong but hasn’t the majority of his privilege been stripped from him? Yeah, he can still visit royal places and such, but doesn’t he have about the same “power” as an in law or something?

There’s also the question of if the monarchy enabled his actions. Though, again I admit they may not have done enough after learning of his actions.

As a Canadian who never really paid attention to British royalty, this feels a lot like blaming a family for one member committing a mass murder. But that could just be a lack of understanding on my part.

[–] Ikon@sh.itjust.works 9 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Well when the family has a long history of mass murder....

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (16 replies)
[–] quick_snail@feddit.nl 24 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Don't post pictures of headlines. Link to the article

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Ash@piefed.social 18 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I'd literally tell him to "fuck off I'll call you Nonce Andrew, and if you threaten me I'll go to the press and tell them even more shit that will get you in prison, you fucking nonce. Now get on your knees and apologise. And then I'd film it, and send it to the press"

[–] NihilsineNefas@slrpnk.net 12 points 4 months ago (7 children)
[–] 100_kg_90_de_belin@feddit.it 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Racist fucks doing racist fuckery

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (6 replies)
[–] ruuster13@lemmy.zip 18 points 4 months ago (3 children)

It stands for "Sweat Isn't Real"

[–] hector@lemmy.today 7 points 4 months ago (2 children)

What a bizarre claim to make, that he can't sweat was it? Obviously not true, he was in the military I think, even as a helicopter pilot he wouldn't be able to serve if he couldn't sweat. You wouldn't be able to live without sweating first time you get some exercize you would get brain damage, or first trip to the subtropics, from the heat. Your balls would get fried too.

Guy obviously can sweat if he couldn't he would be like a bubble boy.

[–] Schmuppes@lemmy.today 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

The helicopter pilot was his nephew, Harry. I believe Andrew served in the Navy during the Falklands war.

[–] hector@lemmy.today 4 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Ah thanks I always avoided learning anything about the royal family but someone recently said he was also a helicopter pilot in the falklands, I remember Harry in afghanistan because of those comments he made that got leaked using a slur and whatever else.

Any which way, you can't serve in the armed forces in about any capacity if you can't sweat. They won't event take flat feet.

It's just such an outlandish lie, like that is the best he could come up with? And it doesn't absolve him either if I recall.

[–] Schmuppes@lemmy.today 7 points 4 months ago

The interview where he made those claims backfired so spectacularly for him, it's worth a watch. I think I'm going to watch it again tonight.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QtBS8COhhhM

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Regrettable_incident@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago (2 children)

The really incredible thing is that he thought everyone was dumb enough to fall for all the bullshit in that interview. "I have a tendency to be too honourable." FFS.

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] mEEGal@lemmy.world 17 points 4 months ago

My first impulse was to comment this :

But then...

[–] Mulligrubs@lemmy.world 13 points 4 months ago

No matter what they are forced to call you, you'll always see the contempt in their eyes; not one person smiling to see you walk into the room, ever.

[–] Gork@sopuli.xyz 13 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

You're just a Mr. Mountbatten-Windsor to me.

[–] csolisr@hub.azkware.net 13 points 4 months ago

Wait until they downgrade him from Mountbatten to just Hill

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 12 points 4 months ago

Sir Pedophile

[–] HubertManne@piefed.social 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

People are very negative but they don't understand the house of windsor and how tradional it is. What else is traditional. The stockades.

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 11 points 4 months ago (4 children)

I think it's particularly hilarious that for all the talk of tradition, the house of "Windsor" was a name chosen during WWI, barely more than a century ago. The original name was "Saxe-Coburg and Gotha", but somewhat awkwardly German bombers built by Gothaer Waggonfabrik and popularly known as "Gothas" happened to be dropping explosives on London.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

lol ok sure, Andrew formerly known as Prince

[–] DigitalAudio@sopuli.xyz 4 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

The thing about "prince" is that it's halfway to "nonce"

[–] SnarkoPolo@lemmy.world 8 points 4 months ago

Where is he interacting with royal staff these days?

[–] Gammelfisch@lemmy.world 7 points 4 months ago

The pedophile traitor deserves a single finger salute and tell him to fetch his own beer.

[–] sirico@feddit.uk 7 points 4 months ago

Should be calling him by a number

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 7 points 4 months ago (3 children)

This Saxon Royalist shit heap deserves to be buried in an unmarked grave. Ideally without building a parking lot over his insipid pedophilic corpse so as to deny him even identification after centuries of disgraced death.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] Madison420@lemmy.world 7 points 4 months ago (2 children)

They can't call him sir, that's an honorific in England that has meaning and he lost all formal titles, legally he isn't a sir anymore he's a Mr.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] IAmYouButYouDontKnowYet@reddthat.com 6 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

No son of royalty or riches is a real boy!

Mainstream or street.

[–] Spesknight@lemmy.world 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Ser Fucked (read it in Spanish)

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Redvenom@retrolemmy.com 5 points 4 months ago

Fuck you Andy

[–] WoodScientist@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

The only good royal is dead royal.

Being a monarch or nobility of any kind is a crime against humanity. And yes, this applies to all, no exceptions. I don't care how "constitutional" a monarch is. No one should have inheritable legal status or power. Inherited wealth is bad enough. Every king or noble should have to give up their title or give up their head.

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›