this post was submitted on 06 May 2026
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Programmer Humor

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[–] dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world 15 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

Linux shell also has... a thing going on.

touch
top
mount
man
fsck
[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 11 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] hancock@retrolemmy.com 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] ptu@sopuli.xyz 2 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)
[–] Phantaloons@piefed.zip 10 points 6 days ago (2 children)
[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 6 days ago (1 children)

--verbose is for when you want dirty talk

[–] pewpew@feddit.it 4 points 5 days ago

That feeling when your code compiles after a long session of refactoring

[–] umbraroze@slrpnk.net 6 points 6 days ago

It goes WAY back.

The Apollo Guidance Computer software had a routine called KISSING. ...about LM-CM docking, of course.

You saw the opening scene of Apollo 13 and thought only the astronauts used horny references in regards to the docking? Think again! So did the programmers.

[–] Alvaro@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Keep It Stupid. Simple!

[–] ikidd@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] Hupf@feddit.org 3 points 5 days ago

Plug it, play it, burn it, rip it, drag it, drop it,...

[–] skuzz@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 6 days ago

cherry-pick the tip

git reset --hard HEAD

and on and on

[–] joe@lemmy.today 7 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Look, most of us are just kinda repressed and low-level horny at all times

[–] mirshafie@europe.pub 1 points 6 days ago

Some of us aren't repressed!

[–] IndustryStandard@lemmy.world 2 points 5 days ago
[–] fushuan@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 6 days ago

From those only pentest has kind of a sus name. But that's understandable, hackers are degenerates. Also there's a reason it's called pentest and not the full name lmao.

[–] mycodesucks@lemmy.world 1 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

We're good with technology, so we're VERY easily able to find our EXACT preferred porn for our EXACT fetishes. That snowballs.

Also, forget ALT-TAB. We Linux users LOVE having keyboard shortcuts for completely different desktops... for reasons.

[–] explodIng_lIme@lemmy.world 92 points 1 week ago (5 children)
[–] snooggums@piefed.world 30 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Kenny2999@lemmy.world 21 points 1 week ago (1 children)
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[–] SchmidtGenetics@lemmy.world 79 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

Construction is like this too.

Erection, nipples, rods, pipes, vibrators, lube, rope, caulk, penetrate, lay hardwood, and my all time favorite. “Hey Frank, come give me a reach around, I need an extra hand here”

Edit, nailing studs.

[–] DarthFreyr@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago

"Get me some oil so I can tap this tight hole. You're going to need to screw it hard, and then drop a double nut on it. Make sure to keep your bush clean, or you can try sticking your finger in and twisting it around, otherwise you'll never get this hard shaft into it. And remember: if it's walking funny when you drill, try putting the tip between a pair of nuts."

Maybe a bit more machining, but it's not even a stretch to make it sound absolutely terrible. Those are all even pretty reasonable statements in context (if you know zero slang), not just isolated words.

[–] Longmactoppedup@aussie.zone 2 points 6 days ago

Had any "Full penetration butt welds" lately?

[–] Denvil@piefed.world 34 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

I love telling people who aren't from Cincinnati that I had a threeway with some strangers in a parking lot

That is, I ate a 3-way (Cincinnati chili, cheese, and spaghetti) in a parking lot on lunch break with some random plumbers who were also taking their break there

[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 17 points 1 week ago (2 children)

how do you know someone's from Cincinnati?

Don't worry, they'll tell you

[–] Denvil@piefed.world 25 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I'll have you know that Cincinnati cuisine is the absolute greatest cuisine to EVER originate in Cincinnati

[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago

I cannot disagree. You guys need the tautology award for tautology award winners.

[–] nymnympseudonym@piefed.social 10 points 1 week ago

Some men are born great
Some men achieve greatness
... and some are from Ohio

Political slogan from the 1840's Presidential campaign ("Tippacanoe and Tyler too!")

[–] Dagnet@lemmy.world 61 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] palordrolap@fedia.io 51 points 1 week ago (2 children)

haha forking processes and killing children

wait

[–] isVeryLoud@lemmy.ca 16 points 6 days ago

Remove child from parent using fork

:)

[–] pressanykeynow@lemmy.world 6 points 6 days ago

Daemon spawning mmm

[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 36 points 1 week ago (2 children)

We used to finger our users too.

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[–] SethTaylor@lemmy.world 29 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Oh my god I'm sorry I compiled so fast. This never happens. You're just so pretty...

[–] cbazero@programming.dev 12 points 1 week ago

I dumped my core so fast ...

[–] vrek@programming.dev 21 points 1 week ago

Unzip. Finger. Fsck. Sleep.

[–] Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de 18 points 1 week ago

I think there are 4 reasons:

  1. Most people are very horny
  2. It people are very online
  3. A lot of it people are obsessive with it, consequently easily identifiable as such.
  4. Other professions aren't as identifiable, or online.
[–] Cevilia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 15 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Just wait until you learn about buttplug.io!

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[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Software, firmware, and hardware.

Today i realized, that firmware is just the between-step of soft and hardware.

[–] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 week ago

touch grass

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