this post was submitted on 26 Mar 2026
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Don't be mean. I promise to do my best to judge that fairly.

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Parasite (lemmy.world)
submitted 2 weeks ago by The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world to c/curatedtumblr@sh.itjust.works
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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 57 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

i have a friend who was doing a twitch fundraiser, right? it was a fundraiser for a good cause. i DO fundraisers for a living. So i pop on, say hi, she doesn't recognize me, i drop in 50 bucks because fundraiser and i could afford to tighten the belt that month. like, this is a normal donation in the charity world. She Did Not Tell Me that she was eating a slice of lemon for every dollar that was donated. Oh My Gods i have never felt so guilty for doing a fundraiser i tried to stop her. I had no idea this was a huge donation for twitch.

honestly, i still feel kinda guilty and it's been years.

[–] The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world 51 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Paying your friend to eat 50 lemon slices in a row is a fantastic story at least. That's hilarious.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 44 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

accidentally paying your friend to eat 50 lemon slices in a row.

five whole lemons.

i really wish she'd told me. the lemons on my lemon tree are sweet, not sour. why did she use her own lemons

[–] DeltaWingDragon@sh.itjust.works 23 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

If she used sweet lemons, the whores would steal them

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 21 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

i have had exactly zero whores try to steal my lemons...

i am dressed pretty slutty.

am... am i the whore?

[–] ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

am… am i the whore?

Yes however we all enjoy your lemons 😉

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

here eat 50 slices

[–] Test_Tickles@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

No wait, you're doing it backwards. Whores are the financially responsible ones, they accept money, not give it.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

nothing could possibly go wrong eating 50 slices of lemon and then straight to bed how does that meme go

[–] MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works 23 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

So what was the plan if there was a $1,000 donation?

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 11 points 2 weeks ago

Honestly? I think they spent the money in their heads (she was also in the group she was fundraising for) before they ate the lemons in their heads

[–] Vile_port_aloo@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Clip it?

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

This was years ago and i have spent like a total of five hours watching twitch(they were all that stream to see if anyone else would make my mistake. She explained the rules better when people logged in)

[–] Eternal192@anarchist.nexus 52 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Twitch streamers, YouTubers, only fans, unrelated but scalpers probably belong here as well.

[–] panda_abyss@lemmy.ca 50 points 2 weeks ago (13 children)

Scalpers aren’t really living off the hospitality of others, they’re taking advantage of illiquidity to create arbitrage and fuck over regular people.

[–] Eternal192@anarchist.nexus 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Doesn't matter how they are taking advantage, they are still parasites.

[–] LwL@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

They're the only actual parasites in that list, the rest just provide a service people pay for. Which is closer to the parasitus class described in the OP.

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[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 33 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Roman society is immensely grim sounding

[–] atomicbocks@sh.itjust.works 35 points 2 weeks ago (6 children)

Roman society is pretty much the basis for the western world. The Romans are largely the reason for the rampant patriarchy we have today among other things, for instance.

[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago

I totally agree - didn't they invent the word?

But yeah, reading about the patriarchal structure in Roman society was like...

Because there's a clear cut path from what they set up back then to where we are today. Thanks, Romans.

[–] fossilesque@mander.xyz 2 points 2 weeks ago

Our modern state is built on its foundations and they've been fucking us ever since.

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[–] JayDee@lemmy.sdf.org 14 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

There's still examples of people being paid to live in peoples' homes as sex servants and whatnot, let's not act like this kind of thing just evolves out of existance. I think I even remember a reddit post of someone talking about how a married couple paid for their tuition in exchange for being a plaything for them while at college.

[–] cRazi_man@europe.pub 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

There are stories in British tabloids every few months about how young women in university are paying for their education by being available at the whim of wealthy sugar daddies.

[–] village604@adultswim.fan 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

If I had been able to do that as a man, I would have 100% been on board with it. I don't see any issue with the situation as long as both parties agree to it.

Although I guess I technically did it since the job that was fucking me had tuition reimbursement.

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Personally I think the sexual exploitation of the youth to pay for the job training to become wage slaves isn't something a society should be proud of.

[–] drmoose@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

You can also view it as independence and agency. Why shouldn't I capitalise on my resources?

Broadly speaking that's only an issue if the former is much more powerful than the latter and I don't think that"s the case in the UK. There are plenty of other ways of funding education that are very much accessible but selling booty is easier and more fun than flipping burgers why not?

The real pain point here is society's judgement towards sex work.

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 2 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Gonna be real bro, I think you should take that blood lubed orphan crushing machine you're defending and shove it where the sun don't shine, then sell the video because it's just society's attitude about exploiting the hope for a future keeping you down, maaaaan.

Or maybe you can just admit that there's a difference between taking up sex work because you like it, or at least don't mind it, and selling yourself to gross old perverts for tuition?

There's always going to be a power disparity built into people dangling your future on a string in front of you, it comes as a package deal with the capitalist cannibalism of its own youths.

[–] drmoose@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Genuinely confused what you're even talking about but it's my bad - didn't see I'm communicating with bible belt social. Have a good day tho

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 1 points 1 week ago

Lmao yeah bro we're all about Puritanism on this instance.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

my body looks weird. lots of scar tissue. i was a regular model at the art school and they loved me because i'm so fucking lumpy. my mother would be so ashamed to learn i had to take my clothes off for money to get through school, because i also had a full time and part time job and loans and that still wasn't enough to survive. she's a prude though, this was art. that one is a secret between my wife and i (who funny enough did it at one of those mormon schools, so she got to wear a swimsuit)

[–] ByteJunk@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

You guys are getting paid??

[–] Psythik@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

YouTuber since 2006, here: I have not received a single cent. They demonetized me (along with millions others when they changed their rules) shortly before I hit the $100 payout threshold and then kept the money.

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 1 points 2 weeks ago

You need to be able to put your ankles behind your head.

[–] IAmYouButYouDontKnowYet@reddthat.com 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

It's literally influencers and celebrities.

[–] N0t_5ure@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

Kato Kaelin comes to mind....

[–] BigBananaDealer@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

arent those called neets now

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