Scolding hot coffee that melts off your labia with a side of nationwide slander.
this post was submitted on 12 Mar 2026
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melts off your labia
you're drinking it wrong.
An ad for a toy.
An ad for a toy that gives you 100 McGems for watching it and a button to buy 1000 McGems for $5.99 (toys cost 1200 McGems)
That math is too clean...
The ad gives 99 McGems, a toy costs 2000 McGems, and you get 750 McGems for $5.99, with 200 bonus McGems on you first purchase.
Now we're talking!
They’re both McDonalds, but one is served at the White House.
McDonald’s food
Homework
Gun
A tool. Generally a hammer, but an awl, hatchet, saw, or scribe will do as well. Maybe even a paint pen or novelty oversized permanent marker.
Sounds like someone has woodworking on their mind
Not really, I just can't expect an angry meal to come with a plasma torch, tannerite, or mag drill with carbide annular cutters, can I?
The contentment meal is a bag of jerky served on a knee mill
Wet socks
A Beanie Baby stuffed with hemorrhoids
Cold chips
A Stressball
Bees
Or dogs with bees in their mouth and when they bark, they shoot bees at you?
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The same toy, smashed.
Crumpled sauce packets that are oozing out.
Have you been to a restaurant lately? It's the bill, the bill makes it an angry meal. The free toy in your happy meal makes it cost more. The last thing we need at home is more plastic junk.
Loaded handgun, where my fellow americans at?
here
and empty fries container
A knife
Homework
An adorable little bag of Ricin.
A knife. Or maybe something really annoying, like a QR code that goes to videos of Mike Johnson talking
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Small bottle of whiskey.
They take a toy
A discount voucher for McTherapy.
A gun
A coupon good for $5 off your next purchase of 4 sticks of 16gb RAM.
Fox News
Small Chinese toys painted with "slightly" radioactive paint.
6-pack of Natty Ice
A shiv.
A harsh judgement.
Molotov cocktail. Or a can of spray paint.
MD 20/20
A loaded gun
The Bible!
A broken toy.
A Glock
a image of a middle finger
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