this post was submitted on 06 Feb 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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top 24 comments
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[–] merari42@lemmy.world 29 points 10 months ago (2 children)

It's disgusting. Is it? Honey comes from a bee's behind. Milk comes from a COW'S behind. And have you ever used toothpaste?

[–] SamboT@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago

Who's behind does that come from?

[–] Sonotsugipaa@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I vaguely know that you're quoting Futurama, but what about toothpaste? I don't think they're made with animal body fluids

[–] Spiderwort@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 points 10 months ago (2 children)

That feeling when you wake up Christmas morning to find your chimney all gaped-out and smeared with lube.

[–] assassinatedbyCIA@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago

A terrible day to be literate

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

My father died from a lubed up chimney.

He slipped and broke his neck and we didn’t find him for days until he started to stink.

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 11 points 10 months ago

It's kind of in disorder isn't it?

[–] GeeDubHayduke@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 10 months ago

Wimmy wam wam wazzle! Ho!

[–] Spiderwort@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

It makes a lot of sense actually.

[–] I_Miss_Daniel@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

With that face I could imagine it being a large foreskin instead.

[–] Pika@sh.itjust.works 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Well this could use a nsfw tag lmao creepy af

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.

(sorry, I had to)

[–] synae@lemmy.sdf.org 6 points 10 months ago

Dune 3 gonna be lit

[–] qyron@sopuli.xyz 3 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

'kay, hear me out...

You are a very dangerous individual. And whoever came up with the concept in comic is on an entire level of evil, all on their own. This comic is a crime. Under which category, it is still to be defined.

Do you know hiw many years it took me to work myself around the concept of the Alien Matriarch? Too many. Getting rid of the notion of an old dude going from chimney to chimney dispensing gifts was easy. Old fat men don't crawl down chimneys.

This forces me to revisit two concepts I never considered possible to overlap.

Now I want to go and find one of those guns the Space Marines used to engage the xenomorphs in Alien II. And a big effing cargo loading exoskeleton.

I'm not sleeping tonigh. Or ever. And this December I'm going to set traps on the roof.

[–] DickFiasco@lemm.ee 3 points 10 months ago

Lol, this is like "All Through the House" from Love, Death, and Robots.

[–] jenny_ball@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

lol this is great

[–] daggermoon@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

Santa mutated by the T-Virus.

[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

So he's eating all the milk and cookies up his prehensile cloaca?

[–] thermal_shock@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

He likes the ones that make their own gravy.

[–] MITM0@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

You've given me nightmares, thanks

[–] guaraguaito@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 10 months ago
[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 10 months ago

Can you not? At least wait until December...

[–] werefreeatlast@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago

TIL: Santa's little helper is actually his own prolapsed anus.