this post was submitted on 03 Jan 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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all 43 comments
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[–] TheBloodFarts@lemmy.ca 160 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Don't knock on poop's door and be mad when poop's home

[–] AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip 112 points 11 months ago (5 children)

Bro squirting is also just piss. Stop sugarcoating that shit.

[–] naught@sh.itjust.works 55 points 11 months ago (2 children)

A lil piss never hurt nobody nohow

[–] NoForwardslashS@sopuli.xyz 29 points 11 months ago

Calm down Bear Grylls

[–] AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip 23 points 11 months ago

I never said its a bad thing. Hear me out. I just think people think piss is taboo so they invented "piss but not taboo".

[–] Pacattack57@lemmy.world 16 points 11 months ago (3 children)

My thing is why is it never dark yellow like pee is sometimes? When I make my girl squirt is she always well hydrated?

[–] dion_starfire@lemm.ee 101 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Researchers have done sonograms of women before and after arousal, with them having used the restroom immediately at the start of the process to control for initial urine levels. The bladder of a squirter fills rapidly with liquid prior to squirting, significantly faster than it does in similar non-arousal conditions. When you pee, you never void all of the urine in the bladder, so there is definitely pee in squirt, but the urea content was significantly lower than in the pre-arousal urine. IIRC, the researchers determined that the added liquid is mostly just water.

So, squirt is pee, but if she's gone to the bathroom recently, it's very diluted pee.

[–] steal_your_face@lemmy.ml 93 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Damn we got a squirt scholar over here

[–] Juvyn00b@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago

A squolar, if you will

[–] Duranie@leminal.space 3 points 11 months ago

It's not supposed to be dark yellow, so I'm guessing better hydrated.

[–] Tetsuo@jlai.lu 7 points 11 months ago

Don't lie to people it's impossible to sugarcoat it, especially midair.

[–] Default_Defect@midwest.social 1 points 11 months ago

I've been pissed on?!

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 97 points 11 months ago (3 children)

You’re gonna take a girl home and fuck her in the ass and then get mad when you find poop?? This is an occupational risk of ass fucking. Do you not have access to a shower and washing machine?

[–] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 26 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Since the guy is comparing it to squirting, I think his partner had diarrhea.

Not necessarily even related to anal sex, but they might have been trying to hold it but there was no stopping the high pressure leak

[–] CaptnNMorgan@lemmy.world 16 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Holding in a shit before, during or probably even after anal sex can't be a smart idea

[–] OneWomanCreamTeam@sh.itjust.works 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I mean, there's nothing to necessarily imply it was anal sex. trying to hold a shit during any sex is still a kinda risky move.

[–] CaptnNMorgan@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

"there's nothing to necessarily imply it was anal sex." Except for the comment I was replying to said anal sex and the post these comments are under is about anal sex. I definitely think holding a shit in during anal sex is incredibly more dangerous than during normal hetero sex

[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

You keep your washing machine in the shower? That seems risky

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I wouldn't mind a washer machine for people. Circular cylinder with jets on all sides that spray soap and water like a car wash. I'm sure it wouldn't do as well scrubbing but when you need a quick 2 min shower and have had a long day.. sure would beat trying to reach the middle of my back. Stupid stick loofa...

[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 5 points 11 months ago

"Meet George Jetson"

[–] qarbone@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Where did it say he did butt stuff?

[–] tfw_no_toiletpaper@lemmy.world 56 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Bro forgot the sex blanket

[–] Kit@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] jdeath@lemm.ee 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

don’t forget to bring a towel!

[–] Peter1986C@lemmings.world 2 points 11 months ago

Just make sure it's not addicted to crack.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 33 points 11 months ago (1 children)

IDK why, but my ass is self-lubricating. Mucous production just be cray when I'm horny, I guess. 🤷🏻‍♂️

[–] photonic_sorcerer@lemmy.dbzer0.com 41 points 11 months ago

Are you uh.... free tomorrow night? Asking for a friend

[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 31 points 11 months ago

That depends... did you like it?

It's whatever makes you feel better about yourself.

[–] BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world 19 points 11 months ago

What a terrible day to have eyes.

[–] HootinNHollerin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Gotta take er to the vet to get those anal glands exercised 😳

[–] Glitterbomb@lemmy.world 16 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] CitizenKong@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago

Can confirm, I'm wet.

[–] kubica@fedia.io 9 points 11 months ago

Assquirting?

[–] udon@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

How did he do that with his one inch weenie?

[–] abolishredditnaw@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago

Its not about the wand, its about the wizard