this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2026
432 points (96.2% liked)

Dad Jokes

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This is a community for sharing those cheesy “dad” jokes that invoke an eye roll or chuckle.

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[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 75 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] NaibofTabr@infosec.pub 21 points 1 day ago (3 children)
[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 46 points 1 day ago (1 children)

The last few posts like this that have been made, the comments were filled with people who didn't get it. I'm getting ahead of that 😤

[–] Zorque@lemmy.world 22 points 1 day ago

How dare you help provide context instead of mocking people who don't get it. This is the internet, non-gender-specific-sir.

[–] lettruthout@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

Just not a good one.

[–] dreadbeef@lemmy.dbzer0.com 42 points 1 day ago (5 children)
[–] Plastic_Ramses@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

I TRIED TO DO WHAT IT SHOWED IN THE PICTURE BROTHER BUT NOW IM IN THE HOSPITAL WITH A VICE GRIPS LATCHED ONTO MY SWIM SUIT AREA.

AUNT GRETA ISNT GOING TO LIKE THIS ONE

AROOOOOOO

[–] aldhissla@piefed.world 6 points 1 day ago

I CAN'T HEAR YOU, BROTHER! AROOOO!!!

[–] MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 day ago

I CRANKED MY HOG MULTIPLE TIMES TODAY BROTHER, BUT I STILL GOT MORE! ARRROOO

[–] Thunderwolf@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago
[–] kinkles@sh.itjust.works 35 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] MasterNerd@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 day ago

I tend to do that when I'm sad

[–] kmartburrito@lemmy.world 21 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] Pat_Riot@lemmy.today 4 points 1 day ago

Easy there, this is a family friendly comm.

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 1 points 18 hours ago

A ham press?

[–] rizzothesmall@sh.itjust.works 1 points 20 hours ago

Secure your gammon

[–] massive_bereavement@fedia.io 15 points 1 day ago

And you call them clamped hams despite the fact that they are obviously plated.

[–] SpiffyPotato@feddit.uk 16 points 1 day ago

Vice your gammon…?

[–] Mpatch@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world 1 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

... in a box. In a tote bag, filled with sauce!

DickoTown!

[–] lime@feddit.nu 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] Emptiness@lemmy.world 1 points 20 hours ago

Kan du va själv!

[–] gigastasio@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 day ago

If you’ll all excuse me I’m gonna go “clamp my ham” if you get what I’m sayin… winks knowingly

Pinch your polska

[–] Steve@startrek.website 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] Syltti@lemmy.world 13 points 1 day ago

"Clamp your hams" is my guess.

[–] Sibshops@feddit.cl 4 points 1 day ago

Squeezy your charcuterie

[–] farmgineer@nord.pub 2 points 1 day ago

ハムを治まる?

[–] Daze@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 day ago

Clasp your Ham

[–] sit@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 day ago

..put your clamped meat loaf slice on a plate with Mediterranean design.

[–] Vandals_handle@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago