Ask Lemmy

By dating her best friend, having argument with said best friend, SO was the intermediary. Realized SO was the better of the of the 2 anyway so took her on a date along with 4 other of her friends. By end of evening, SO and I were in love.

47. Didn't. Stopped looking. If they exist they're going to have to walk in to me physically and be very obvious because I'm not even looking for signs any more.

My cat: Shelter. He came right up on my lap purring, never did it again. Con artist.

My wife: art gallery

Met my wife at a dungeon. Shot my shot at two women at the same time and the fool who thought it was charming even managed to get tricked into marriage.

Met my best friends by answering an ad looking for other lesbians to play d&d during the pandemic. Those of us who showed up and stayed wound up forming extremely strong friendships.

I met my cat in a shelter. She was already an adult cat and very anxious/skiddish around people. When I said I wanted her I literally got looks from the staff that practically screamed "Her!? Really??"

Took well over a year, but eventually she became a silly mush that loves to be near me. Now its been over 10 years with her. She's all I have as far as a companion goes and probably all I'll ever have, but she's the best!

Joined my guild. Most expressive person I ever met, 10/10 over the top, so I dealt with that myself. Turns out I like very cheesy, took me years to get used though.

Met my now-wife on Omegle, and my dogs at the shelter. Which is just Omegle for dogs.

I met my wife on IRC. She was attracted to the fact that I could spell. That was 25 years ago.

Semi-blind date. We were setup by a friend of mine that worked with her.

At the time, I was not in a good place and really was not interested in dating. My plan was to meet her, go to dinner, go to a movie then disappear. Why didn't I just say "No" to the date? My friend is a former Navy SEAL and is not one to give up.... Ever. It was just easier for me to say "yes" to the date, go, then go back to my life.

Life had other plans. We met at Newport on the Levee, which is an entertainment/ Shopping complex located right on the Ohio river in Newport, KY. This was in 2004 and the complex was brand new and very popular. So when we exited the restaurant we discovered the line for the movie theater was literally out the door and that was on top of a back and forth line near the box office. So we decided to go to the Barnes and Nobles and get hot chocolate. Neither of us like coffee. We sat down and talked... For THREE hours. It was the best conversation I've ever had with another human being.

We've been together ever since and that was in 2004. We have two boys and live 400 miles away from the Cincinnati area now.

My cats walked up on my front porch and decided they were mine.

Pretty much the same for my SO lmao

She moved in next door. We were both recently divorced. Been 6 years since and I do not know what I'd do without her.

I slacked off in high school and went to community college.

Where I continued slacking off. I sat in the back of one of my history classes because it was near an outlet, so I could plug my laptop in, pretend to be taking notes or whatever, but in actuality was just goofing off for most of the class

Next to me sat another slacker, he was goofing off in much the same sort of way, and we hit it off.

He became, and still is, one of my best friends. Most of my friends I can actually trace back to him in some way or another. He's one of those people whose ability to meet and befriend people everywhere he goes borders on the magical.

One day we met up to go wander around a local flea market/farmers market. We ran into his best friend who also happened to choose that day to go wandering around the aisles of junk looking for hidden treasure.

And that friend brought his girlfriend with him. Years later she would become my wife.

It wasn't exactly love at first sight. We all wandered around together for a while chit-chatting, and eventually we ported ways. She didn't make much of an impression on me at the time, nor I on her, I actually don't think she even remembers this story.

Since we shared pretty much the same circle of friends, we would bump into each other occasionally at parties and such. For a few years I don't think either of us really thought much about the other, we were just friends of a friend who seemed cool enough.

Eventually, of course, the two of them broke up, as tends to happen. We all stayed in pretty much the same social circles, but she and I didn't have a whole lot of direct interaction.

One day, that friend from community college hits me up. He's heading over to the house that she was renting with a couple roommates, no real plans, just chill, have a few beers, watch movies, maybe get some food. So I tag along.

It was basically the three of us hanging out in her living room, and her roommates occasionally wandered in to grab a beer from us before disappearing back into their rooms.

We refer to that night as "The Accidental Nazi Night" because just picking random movies from Netflix, we ended up choosing Iron Sky (about Nazis on the moon,) Equilibrium (dystopian movie with an authoritarian state surprising free expression and such,) and Fire with Fire (where the main villain is a Neo-Nazi)

So that was my first time really spending any sort of quality time with her, just chilling in her living room, killing a case of beer, and watching movies of varying quality.

We became pretty good friends after that. The house she rented basically became the usual hangout place for everyone, so I spent a lot of time there. Funnily enough, she tended to hang out in her room away from all of the action while we were all making a ruckus downstairs.

And so things went for a few years. I'll be honest, I never really had her on my radar as someone I was interested in dating and was content to be friends.

Apparently she was very interested in me though, and was laying the flirting on pretty thick, and it all went over my head. Eventually she realized she would need to resort to more drastic measures, and one night as we happened to be leaving a friend's party at the same time, as we got to our cars she grabbed me and kissed me.

And I'll be honest, that broke my brain a little. From my perspective it kind of came out of nowhere. I kind of had to rethink everything about us and decided, "yeah, fuck it let's see where this goes"

And so here I am a decade or so later, married for 7 years, and pretty happy with how things all turned out.

Cats: went to the cat shelter and chose them.

Though to be fair, only one of my cats chose me. The other I just fell in love with and had to take him even though he was hissing and scared and shit. He’s since turned into a cuddle bug

After a big life upheaval, I decided I needed something fun to do, so I hopped on reddit and went to LFG to find an online game of D&D. Had great fun, but scheduling was difficult, so we kept losing players. The DM put out another LFG post and grabbed a few candidates that is remaining players went through.

And so we chose her. And it was great, we were a party again, full of shenanigans and having fun.

COVID hit and everyone and everything went back into upheaval. That DM ended up having to leave so I chose to pick up the reins for my own game. What a game it was. I've never had such high highs again as a DM.

Unfortunately through COVID and life itself, we had a lot of heavy things happening. But after a couple of years of knowing these people, we were kinda a found family, despite never having met. So sometimes we'd have calls at 3am when someone needed to talk. Sometimes we'd cancel DnD to do something less intense.

Throughout this, I had been going through my own really heavy things and She was there, treating me more kindly than I knew was possible. She would listen and validate me. She helped talk me down from a ledge or two. She was just endlessly patient and sweet.

So seven years on, we've both been through the ringer, been up and down and harder down. But we have grown so much and learned so much together and from one another. She was my best friend and as close as anyone in my life has ever gotten. She's still my best friend but on Christmas she kissed me, so we've been exploring a new angle of our relationship and learning how deeply one can truly love. It's kinda been a joke between us for a while, but I really think I'm going to marry her and spend the rest of my life trying to make her happy.

Tl;dr: online D&D created a family

We were at 6th form college together (UK 16-18). We began seeing each other when we were 18. That was 26 years ago.

Married 20 years almost

She lived in an entirely different city across the country (Europe, so like two hours of train ride).

She saw me on Facebook, based on photos from a goth festival in our city, so I got a message on Messanger from a profile without a profile picture and no mutual friends. We talked for a bit, I was single at the time, and we eventually decided to meet. I had no idea how she looks like, and I kind of found this idea of a blind date funny - either it works, or I'll get a good story out of it.

We decided to meet and go to a local goth scene hangout, and not only she was really pretty, she also brought two bottles of mead. We managed to drink both of them before even getting to the hangout, where it turned out that she was actually not only a classmate of my best friend (a long time ago), but also used to be part of the scene around 5 years ago (before I joined it), before she went no-contact and changed her nickname due to a relationship (that eventually turned out really terrible). So, she knew most of my friends.

That was 7 years ago. At the time she was living in a small flat, after just getting out of a 7 y.o terrible relationship that she couldn't leave due to having a mortgage, but she managed to save enough on a minimal wage to leave when she found out he was cheating. Her grandma was living with her in her small flat, and she was really a terrible person, even had her aunt with the most entitled child move in, and they were even worse. Always arguing, screaming, being rude, and just acting like dicks. She let them live with her, just because they had nowhere to go, even though she was earning a minimal wage. Them saying that "If we don't like it, we should move out", or that "I shouldn't argue, because I don't live here", while I was actually helping her with rent they weren't doing anything for was insane.

I kept visiting her almost daily, spending time in the one small 5x5m room she had for herself, even though it was two hour train ride. During covid, I was mostly staying at her place, and since she loved animals (her mother worked at a zoo, before cancer got her), we discussed what we want to get, and pet racoon was high on the list. And when she said that we will get a racoon once we live together, I immediately found a flat in my city, and we moved in together around 5 years ago. We stole the ashes of her mother and went no-contact with the people living at her old flat. They can burn in hell.

Unfortunately, racoons are not easily legal to own, but we got a lot of different animals instead. She also helped me with starting to make our own goth events, DJ, and help local promoters, and now we're responsible for more than half of goth events that happen in our city. She's now earning more that I do (and I work in IT), and I'm really happy how did everything turned out. We have no idea how did the rest of her familly end up, but we don't really care.

We are kind of planning a wedding, with only witnesses, but so far what's stopping is that I can't find my birth certificate, and that it looks like it's not possible for both of us to have both surnames (the options are one of us keeps theirs, and the other get's both, or we choose one only, and we both want to have both), so we kind of didn't want to bother with it for a while.

At a sex positive meeting 11 years ago. She was there with her fiance and I was there with my fiance. We both thought each other were cute at the time, but we were busy with other partners. A few years later, she randomly messaged me on fetlife asking me out on a date. We've been together ever since. We just got married a few months ago.

Friend of a friend. I ordered her a scotch. She downed it like it was a shot, then was so adorably embarrassed when I told her it wasn’t a shot- hung out the rest of the night laughing about that among other things…

That was over 18 years ago. ❤️

Dog 1 - followed me home while walking late at night with who I thought would be my forever person

Dog 2 - gifted by who I thought would be my forever person after talking about starting a family

Dog 3 - daughter to Dog 2...little rascal started his own family 

OK Cupid 10 years ago next week.

Installed a package from an opensource repo

I met my wife at a video game arcade in a dirt mall. I worked there and her friends were regulars

I remember the moment I first saw her, in 1995

we started dating in 1998 and have been together ever since

In the local pub. I was in my mid-30s. Now married with kids, mortgage and a dog. All I ever wanted tbh.

Say what you want about pubs and alcohol, but I'll take that encounter over a swipe on an app any day.

I was running a production line. There were different start times for the different parts of the line. The person who was supposed to be catching parts wasn't at his post, and I'd knew him well enough to know he would be hassling some poor random woman who was just trying to do her job. So I went to the department where you would normally find such people, and there he was talking to some cute blonde woman with expressive eyebrows, adorable nose, and striking green and blue eyes. I told him to get lost. I apologized to the woman for him, and she turned out to be very talkative and friendly toward me. I went back to my area and spent all day trying to forget about her. I went back at the end of the day and asked for her email address.

We have been together for 18 years, married for 16. We have a kid and a small farm. She is the most amazing and caring person I've ever personally known and she is married to me.

I asked her once what got her attention that first time I met her. She said that I was the first person who ever stood up for her, the first person who ever stood between her and someone else and said "stop".

She hired me.

I took a bus for 3 hours to visit a friend, they drove 9 hours to visit the same friend. I thought it was unfair for them to drive back on their own so I offered to share the drive.

I still don't know why they accepted. I also didn't have a plan to get home from their house. I guess it didn't matter because we're married now.

We met online some 25+ years ago. We met by accident, while we were discussing with other people about some topic. We then started chatting just the two of us, through email and phone and after a (short) while we decided to meet (just to have a drink and diner). We met and that went quite well. So, we met a few more times and one day, rather quickly to be honest, we decided it would be a lot simpler for both of us if we just started living together not planning on anything special or anything long-term, no commitment... 25+ years later, we still live together ;)

OkCupid back when it was good. I'd been on dating apps for years at that point, I was her second match. It's been 6yrs across two countries

Although we are not formally engaged, we've been in love for a long time. We met each other in middle school on the telegram group of a YouTuber. It's been 10 years now 

A Sailor Moon fan forum in the very late 90s. We were long distance for five years while we both finished school, then moved in together for uni. Very simple, really :)

(He recently surprise bought me the most gorgeous Eternal Sailor Moon figurine ❤️)

Met my husband at a church we used to go to (I've since denounced religion). He asked if I wanted to see A Quiet Place. Agreed. Ended up being a double date with another couple who didn't want to see A Quiet Place so we saw Rampage instead. Absolutely fucking horrible movie. But he and I never stopped texting after that and did a subsequent date a couple weeks later. 5th wedding anniversary is Sunday 🙂

Tinder back before it was shit. Really funny though, she was my number neighbor! Like when you have a phone number digit that is one sequence before the other.

I think that means that we had gotten our phone numbers in the same store or at least at the same time years before. It's our favorite joke

One summer my buddy and I were at his place and he was frequently looking at his phone and typing texts looking annoyed. He said "look, take this number. Get this chick off my back". In a nutshell... I took my new mission to heart