If a hypothetical girl really would be "turned off" by you enjoying being yourself, then you probably wouldn't be able to build a loving relationship with them anyways. Don't forget to give the Easter Bunny a copy as well!
this post was submitted on 08 Apr 2025
140 points (94.9% liked)
No Stupid Questions
39897 readers
1456 users here now
No such thing. Ask away!
!nostupidquestions is a community dedicated to being helpful and answering each others' questions on various topics.
The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:
Rules (interactive)
Rule 1- All posts must be legitimate questions. All post titles must include a question.
All posts must be legitimate questions, and all post titles must include a question. Questions that are joke or trolling questions, memes, song lyrics as title, etc. are not allowed here. See Rule 6 for all exceptions.
Rule 2- Your question subject cannot be illegal or NSFW material.
Your question subject cannot be illegal or NSFW material. You will be warned first, banned second.
Rule 3- Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here.
Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here. Breaking this rule will not get you or your post removed, but it will put you at risk, and possibly in danger.
Rule 4- No self promotion or upvote-farming of any kind.
That's it.
Rule 5- No baiting or sealioning or promoting an agenda.
Questions which, instead of being of an innocuous nature, are specifically intended (based on reports and in the opinion of our crack moderation team) to bait users into ideological wars on charged political topics will be removed and the authors warned - or banned - depending on severity.
Rule 6- Regarding META posts and joke questions.
Provided it is about the community itself, you may post non-question posts using the [META] tag on your post title.
On fridays, you are allowed to post meme and troll questions, on the condition that it's in text format only, and conforms with our other rules. These posts MUST include the [NSQ Friday] tag in their title.
If you post a serious question on friday and are looking only for legitimate answers, then please include the [Serious] tag on your post. Irrelevant replies will then be removed by moderators.
Rule 7- You can't intentionally annoy, mock, or harass other members.
If you intentionally annoy, mock, harass, or discriminate against any individual member, you will be removed.
Likewise, if you are a member, sympathiser or a resemblant of a movement that is known to largely hate, mock, discriminate against, and/or want to take lives of a group of people, and you were provably vocal about your hate, then you will be banned on sight.
Rule 8- All comments should try to stay relevant to their parent content.
Rule 9- Reposts from other platforms are not allowed.
Let everyone have their own content.
Rule 10- Majority of bots aren't allowed to participate here. This includes using AI responses and summaries.
Credits
Our breathtaking icon was bestowed upon us by @Cevilia!
The greatest banner of all time: by @TheOneWithTheHair!
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
This is the kind of thing I call a "loser filter". It stops the kind of people you don't want to deal with from entering your life in the first place.
It is immature and if you go around showing it to girls expecting a date you'll be disappointed.
Do it because it's funny, not because you could use it as an ice-breaker (you can't). If you really want to impress girls, doing it and not giving a fuck what your sister thinks is more likely the impress someone, girl or not- but it's not an ice-breaker.
Well he wants to put it on dating profiles.
I just want to do it as not an ice breaker but as something I can bring up on a date while talking about other stuff if it’s relevant.
We are mostly doing it for the lols but figured it being an icebreaker was an extra.
Dating website: probably way too soon to share, just looks cringe.
First date: too soon to share, painfully obvious ploy for attention/trying to stand out.
Second date: getting closer, almost there.
Third date: probably safe to share as something endearing and silly.
My suggestion is to do it for yourself because it is fun, because trying to use it as a token to stand out from other men will be seen as a desperate attempt to be funny/quirky, if you bring it out to early.
You don't use it to initially capture their attention, you use it to seal the deal.
I think this is the reason he shouldn't do it. If the whole reason to do it is to attract women, that is pretty unattractive. It would be funny if they just did it for the "fuck it, why not be silly?" aspect of it, but I feel like if the original reason is to attract women, then the jig is up and it is forced and weird.
"Let's be silly" is cool and attractive. "Let's be silly so we can attract women" is cringe and off-putting.
Precisely why I said that he should do it for himself because it is fun. It's also why I consider it third date material. Not something you bring up spontaneously, but more that they've come back to your apartment and see the photo hanging on your fridge. A casual introduction to it, not forced. It's hanging on your fridge because it's genuinely something you had fun doing, not because you wanted to use it to get women.
But, agreed, if the core of the reason for doing it is to attract women, it's going to backfire spectacularly.
oop my bad, I wrote out my comment and then deleted my main point. I think you hit the nail on the head, my only differing opinion is that I think at this point, it's really difficult to change the underlying reason that he's doing it. At least for me, I wouldnt be able to just "turn off" the original intent of attracting women.
If I went ahead with the plan trying to tell myself, "Well originally it was about getting dates and impressing women, but now its just about having fun," I feel like I'd still be subconsciously doing it for the female gaze. That's why I say the jig is up -- if I were him, I'd bag the idea and wait for next purely silly fun idea
Edit: Little anecdote to illustrate where I'm coming from. When I was in middle school and early high school, I really wanted to be that guy that played guitar. All the girls would love me. I started learning open chords and practicing simple songs, and I managed to learn a few over a couple months. I could never sing and play, just play a couple licks and tunes. But I soon lost interest because I wasn't becoming the guy that played guitar, and girls didnt care that I was the guy that was simply learning to play the guitar.
Fast forward to college/covid, I've lost interest in being the guy that plays guitar. That dude is cringe anyways. But it would be cool to learn how to sing and play guitar at the same time. That sounds like fun, to be able to really play some music. So I picked up a guitar and I was total shit. Couldn't do anything I used to be able to. Eh, whatever, the next time I pick it up, I'll be a tiny bit more comfortable. And I was. I'd accepted I would probably never be a good player. Who cares if I'm good? I just like the feeling of getting a little more fluid. Oh shit! I can play and sing! As long as I play super slowly. Sweet. I start to express myself bit by bit, a little more and a little more, adjusting the tempo, the volume, my vocal delivery. Ooo, that feels good. Huh, look at that! Barre chords are easy now. Hmm...I bet I could go back to that song I couldnt play a while ago and play it now. Oh shit! I can play it! Siiiick. Dang, that was a big bong rip...hmmm what should I do to enjoy this high... looks at the guitar on my wall oh fuck yeah....
And that's how I became the guy that played guitar, who I wanted to be when I was young. I mean I'm still not good. Definitely wouldn't play for an audience. But goddamn if its not the most valuable thing I ever learned to do. I can express myself in a whole new way. I look back and think, if I had approached it from the desire to be at the destination, I would've lost any motivation I had. It couldnt be about becoming good at guitar, or becoming a guitar player, or becoming a guy who played guitar. I needed to approach it from the pure desire to just fuck around on guitar. Try the thing today that I couldnt do yesterday. Oh shit! I can do it! Hell yeah. For me, I never want to do something if I don't enjoy doing it. Fortunately for me, I enjoy fucking up and figuring out why and then doing it better the next day. I like learning, and don't mind being shit at something. No one is good at something the first time.
So that's why I think OP shouldnt go do the photoshoot, because if it isnt for the pure enjoyment of the thing, if the intent is, I guess, polluted, by him wanting to seem like a certain type of person, he's more likely to have a bad time.
load more comments
(4 replies)
Dating website: probably way too soon to share, just looks cringe
You might be right in this case, but I also want to point out that most dating profile fucking suck, and it's not because they are too "cringe" or immature; it's because they are all the same generic pictures. Wedding, gym, hiking, dead-fish, bar, dog.
It's a completely fine idea, people will probably also find it funny as well. Please don't listen to these dinosaurs and enjoy life.
load more comments
(1 replies)
if you go around showing it to girls expecting a date you'll be disappointed.
i think filtering out the kinds of people who would be offended/icked by this (e.g. on a dating site profile) is probably a benefit. i can't fuck someone i can't laugh with.
Your sister sounds like a fucking buzzkill, no offense.
You only need to find one girl. Show this picture around, and most of them will skip out. Then you can focus on the ones that get your sense of humor.
Then you only have to filter for the ones that don't mind that you have a tiny dick.
It would be immature. I thought that was the joke, tho? 🤷🏻♂️
If someone is turned off by checks notes having a sense of humor, they're probably not worth your time anyway.
Yes, it's 100% immature, which is exactly why you should do it.
Any girl who can't appreciate that picture is not worth pursuing
Jesus Christ, stop asking people on the internet for their dumbass opinions on things and just do your shit.
Think something’s funny? Go and do it. Show it to your friends. If they have the same sense of humor, they’ll laugh. Show it to some girls, they’ll laugh if they’re into your shit. That’s how it works.
Socialization is rough, bro. It doesn’t always work out. You’ve got to try shit. Sometimes you get rejected, sometimes it’s a hit. That’s just how it flows. Experience real life, my man. Get off your phone and touch grass.
These communities are an absolute fucking joke. Moderation is non-existent, people are fucking assholes, and the content is grade F garbage shitposts.
a few points: 1) don't let your sister talk you out of fun. 2) your sister knows less about fashion than david alan grier. 3) the most immature thing you can do is worry about whether something is immature. 4) just do what you want. have fun.
Don't do it if you're trying to date your sister.
If a woman i wanted to date didn't find me funny when i do goofy shit, then she would quickly become a woman i dont want to date.
I can be immature without that being my whole personality. I am mature when it's appropriate and immature when it's appropriate.
Just be yourself. You dont want to lock it all away to be in a relationship with someone who can't laugh at a well-timed fart.
The least sexy thing in your post is how miserable your sister seems to be.
Humor is sexy. If a woman won't date you because you took that photo as a joke, you're dodging a bullet.
You and your friend seem to not take yourselves too serious, which is a nice trait.
Your sister seems a bit too uptight.
Do it.
Do it cause you enjoy having fun. Ladies will dig it for that reason. Some will think you're a dork. You don't want those ones anyway. Don't do it cause you're trying to set up a dating profile on some app. That's weird.
Actually I’ve done very well with girls who think I’m a dork, in an endearing way
load more comments
(1 replies)
Unless you’re causing harm, what others might think is rarely a good enough reason not to do something you genuinely want to do.
Will it be funny you think? Do it.
What kind of girl do you want to attract anyway? Do you want a full l girl that thinks that kind of stuff is funny or do you want a girl that finds it immature?
+1 for doing it. Have fun!
Don’t forget to bring giant lollipops and paint freckles on your faces!
i got a slide whistle and kazoo if you need one
Immature or not, that's your sense of humor. If a woman has an issue with the picture, there's a decent chance you won't get along anyway, so in that way it would actually be a good compatibility litmus test.
Do it. Who cares what girls think! But if you're trying to attract one then maybe wait a bit before showing her the dumb shit you like doing with your mates.
The world needs more silliness and whimsy. Don't be afraid to be cringe, you will be free.
You also have an obligation to share the image when you take it.
if I were to show a girl they would immediately be turned off.
I wouldn't use the photo as your opening gambit, but in an album of similar photos it's a positive, not a negative.
Immature? No. Fucking stupid? Totally. I'm a man and if a friend approached me with that idea, I'd be "fuck yeah, let's do it"
The picture itself will obviously pique anyone's curiosity, so I hope you have a better story behind it than "Oh, I just wanted an icebreaker", or that the taking of the picture generates a good story! 😆
If I acted in any besides just me being me, I wouldn't be married today. Never pretend to be someone you're not, any friends you make then won't be yours, they'll be that phantom persons.
So what if it's immature anyway? So are loads of things. And most of them are fun. You exist for your pleasure, not other people's.
Signed, a 52 year old skateboarder that still watches Arthur and farts on his kids.
Do it if it means you have a good time and you get a funny picture afterwards
Plus most girls I know would actually like a guy who's not afraid of not being "nonchalant". I think if a girl you show this picture to is turned off by it, it's a dodged bullet for a materialistic/superficial relationship anyways.
Your sister sounds immature.
our pictures taken with the Easter bunny while wearing overalls and a propeller hat. my sister says it’ll be immature
Is it a real question?
You have to get older, but you don't have to grow up. Do the fun shit in life that hurts nobody. This place hasn't been so that great over the last decade, so you got to find joys in this life.
I'm mid thirties and when the opportunity presents itself, I'll look a fool for my own and other's entertainment. Have a laugh, enjoy yourself, don't negatively affect others with your fun, and don't worry about what other people think of you.
Beware people who mistake fun and humor for immaturity.
Anyone who’s “immediately turned off” probably wouldn’t be much fun to be with, anyway. Your idea is a good one. The propeller hat makes it screamingly obvious that this is a fun joke. DO IT!
Edit: perhaps consider including one of those giant lollipops
When you're 75 you'll look back at it and grin. Enjoy life
It's totally immature.
If that's something you think you'll have fun doing, I fully recommend it!
Do it. Sounds hilarious.
Many would find it stupid, but those people don't share your sense of humor and you would never get along with them in the first place.
So go and put the picture, it will help weed out people you don't want to waste your time with. You'll only get those who either don't mind or who actually think it's funny too.
Who cares. Do it!
The Guardian does an occasional feature called Flashback, where a celebrity recreates a childhood photo. It's a bit of fun! You have my permission to go right ahead. A sense of humour is very attractive.
view more: next ›