this post was submitted on 07 Apr 2025
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Microblog Memes

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[–] [email protected] 163 points 6 days ago (3 children)

Time zones? What, like I step over a line on the ground and I'm in the future? Pfffft.

[–] [email protected] 118 points 6 days ago (2 children)

It's so much worse than that. The people in the GMT +13 time zone had 19 hours to warn us about 9/11 in 2001, and they did nothing!

[–] [email protected] 18 points 5 days ago (2 children)

New Zealand... We demand you tell us what the future is like.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago

You joke, but if the US had done that for COVID, things would have been a lot better. Sure, it's the right answer for the wrong reasons, but it wouldn't be a change for the worse compared to the current methods.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago

I'm sorry for the bad news, but it's terrible in the future. Just like every other day

[–] [email protected] 18 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Well yeah, they're all old and forgetful. They could come West and be younger but they don't care. They're old.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 days ago (1 children)

If you go to the North pole and run around in circles you can easily get years into the past.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 days ago (3 children)

That's a common misconception. Magnetic north declination from geographic north increases to its maximum as one approaches the geographic north pole (by definition). Yes, technically, your geographic time may reverse by years, but the increase in magnetic time, being equal and opposite, will effectively cancel out that effect.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Sure but you forgot one thing. Gravity.

Gravity pulls down, so when you go towards the North Pole you are actually getting further from gravity and that lesser force still pushes the entire effect into the positive. If you tried this in the south pole you would actually get older!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 days ago (1 children)

It would if the earth were a perfect sphere, but in reality, it's an oblate sphereoid. This means that an observer actually gets closer to the center of gravity as one approaches a pole.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 days ago

Maybe. But everyone knows gravity pulls "down" and not "towards the center of the oblate spheroid" (nonsense word made up by """mathematicians""" to make us look like fools)

[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 days ago (1 children)

This kind of troll science is the caliber that makes actual conspiracies form when stupid people read it.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago

Thank you. I'm sorry.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Sir, you have a dizzying intellect.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago

Thanks! I just thought it was from drinking.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Wouldn't they get younger more quickly if they moved east across the much-shorter distance to the international date line?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Some say that if you go to the international date line and climb over the map's edge, you'll find the secret fifth Carmel Tunnel that will take you straight to Big Math HQ. They won't let you go there easily.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Have you considered starting a cult? I feel like you might do well.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I just need to look up a few Bible quotes out of context, make up a few math equations, put up a not at all suspicious link and an oddly specific location in the middle of nowhere, and then I'm all set.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Well, I'm sold. Just give me the details. Have you decided on a title for yourself?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Just got the Bible verses of 1:6 and 1:7 for a source of one, I also just drew a map. Big Math Co. is in there somewhere.

I have not decided on a title for myself yet, although I'm sure I can just take a name from the Bible again. Now I just need to get all those people...

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

How about "shepherd?" That'll also help you wrangle some followers

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

Sounds like a nice name, Thanks!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 days ago (1 children)

This is far too technical. Are you one of those "scientists" I hear about? :)

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago

I did done a science or two in my time, but I ain't no scientist.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago

“The Island of the Day Before” vibes