this post was submitted on 23 Aug 2024
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I'm regularly surprised by how many people manage to shit themselves, and how it's common enough that people have a casual laugh over their "shat myself" stories. I feel left out. I laughed so hard I peed myself once when I was 5?
I have IBS, and while I've had many close calls I can proudly say that I've never shit myself. As someone that's basically a flight risk for accidental pooping, as well as having heard these stories before in-person, I often wonder if more people have stomach/bowel problems than they'd like to let on.
you've jynxed yourself and i kind of hope you shit yourself now just so i can say "shouldn't have shitposted about it" in response.
this might be my most elaborate shitpost yet.
i left work right after clocking in because a fart felt like pushing out more than just air. so embarassing
I sneezed and shat myself the other month, maybe you're young or maybe you've got a good bowel sytem.
I coughed, burped, and sharted simultaneously a while back. It was disorienting and I felt violated
If you time it right you can hit the ceiling with those
and how it’s common enough that people have a casual laugh over their “shat myself” stories
That's how we deal with the trauma.
Never trust a fart.
So say keto dieters
Clearly you're all blocked up. You should eat more fiber.
OP has a gaping asshole.
Drink way too much cheap liquor and you too can have the opportunity to shit yourself the next day.
I was almost at work when I sharted.
Thought, well, "oh shit" lol. But I was like "OK, get to work, immediately to toilet and alls good."
My desks in a corner and none of my team were in that day. Can't get rid of the smell totally but it won't be terrible and I'd be well away from everyone else.
Then I have to go upstairs and spend the day in the very small secure room. Obviously the super cute girl I have a crush on is also working in there that day.
That would have been a good time to go full commando.
I hate myself for wanting to know how the interview went
shitty
But did they get the job?
It's not the jeans that are cursed...
Dude accidentally bought the +2 Jeans of Cure Constipation
dont eat stuff that makes you fart to much or lets you have stomach aches. its stupid.
Is everyone in this comment section on a fiber only diet?
a curse upon my anoose
lmao
I get really upset stomach when I travel. And I have a 6 hour train journey just today. Is the universe trying to tell me something?
It's telling you, "bring an extra pair of pants."
Brown ones.
Drink peppermint tea.
Why is it always the shitting anonself greentexts that get me?
Consistent loss of bowel control is a medical emergency. Think nerve damage