this post was submitted on 25 Dec 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] Asafum@feddit.nl 8 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I'll never understand that reaction. I completely understand seeing that and wanting to kill yourself, but I never thought the happy couple should die.

I see those kinds of couples and my only thoughts are usually some form of "lucky lucky. I'm such a worthless piece of shit." Lol

[–] LodeMike@lemmy.today 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Armchair psychology by your local dipshit:

Depression tends to be irrational, and thus thought processes around it tend to be irrational.

[–] shneancy@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (6 children)

"if i can't have it, nobody should have it"

also applies to everyone who opposes progress because they had it hard in life

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[–] Ragdoll_X@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

It probably depends on your personality, mainly agreeableness.

Agreeable people direct their anger and frustration at themselves, while those who are disagreeable direct it at others.

[–] kshade@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I'll never understand that reaction.

The experience probably felt painful (literally) for Anon so his lizard brain immediately wanted to strike back at what's causing the pain. Doesn't make much sense of course so he didn't actually do it, probably felt bad about it too.

[–] ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 year ago
[–] isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

after many years of depression, I have just given up on dating, it's not fun, it's not rewarding (for me) and my hobbies keep me happy and fulfilled enough. If something wants to happen, I'm ready to welcome it, if not, who cares

[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm sorry to hear you've had difficulty finding someone. If your hobbies keep you happy and fulfilled, just make sure those hobbies don't keep you home alone. Go to gatherings of other hobby enthusiasts, good chance that there you'll find someone that is your perfect fit

[–] Damage@slrpnk.net 1 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Interesting how this short story includes height

[–] NikkiDimes@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Dude, incels are obsessed with height

[–] ameancow@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

The act of rumination on a depressive episode involves your brain trying to find something about you, something immutable and deeply connected with who you are as a person, and it takes that thing and amplifies it through a wickedly destructive lens.

See, a lot of people don't know how their own brain works. They think they can think about something and their thoughts will reason out a solution, or that all their ideas are based on the brain's ability to connect logical elements.

Nothing could be further from the truth. Your brain is designed to write a story to explain how you feel. That's it. If you already feel bad, especially if you're not entirely sure why, your brain will scramble for a story, it will tie together every weird loose-end it can find, and assemble a batshit nonsense story for you, which you will believe wholeheartedly. You think your brain is you. You think your thoughts have to be true if they come from inside. Many people never consider that their own thinking is fundamentally wrong, and most of us are wrong about a number of things we feel wholly confident about.

Curbing depressive episodes and getting your life back involves learning to identify when you start ruminating and nipping it in the bud. For many insecure, lonely guys, memes/stories like this will be MAJOR trigger-points for rumination episodes, an act that becomes strangely addictive when you're suffering depression.

The difference between some sullen incel who hates life and hates you and hates women and hates themselves, but happens to be 5' 9", versus a really short dude who has a nice girlfriend and smiles a lot about their life and appreciates what he has, absolutely comes down to how their brains have learned to assemble stories for their world and how emotionally intelligent they are. Some dude is reading this post right now gnashing their teeth and formulating pushback and opposition because their brain is resisting this message because brains hate to be wrong. Even though they're very good at being wrong.

[–] scarilog@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

This is just... Wow, absolutely incredible explanation.

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You discribe both nightmares and anxiety realy well with your explanation IMO. And intrusive thoughts probably follow the same "brain has a target, and just fills in the details to fet there" too.

Those people vaning away because of a girl 6 inches shorter though, I mean it's just 15cm?? Even a shorty can find girls 15 cm shorter, right? Amazing.

[–] medgremlin@midwest.social 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's really unhealthy to categorize people by something as superficial as height though. I'm about 1 inch taller than my husband. The only consequence of that is the fact that it looks kinda silly if I wear really high heels. He's not self-conscious about it, I'm not self-conscious about it, and if either of us placed value on the woman in a heteronormative relationship needing to be shorter, I wouldn't have ended up with the love of my life.

Writing someone off because of one stat/measurement is absolutely insane and I think a lot of people would be happier if they quit or heavily limited their social media use to limit the torrent of self-criticism from comparison that come from social media.

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Yes exactly.

Especially things you cannot change, but I guess that's the thing making it even worse.

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago

Interesting how you chose to describe this story by its height

[–] Maalus@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think it sets up the scene, of her having to look up at his face a little bit

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

See a couple my age out in public. Its this guy who is 6 inches tall and is being held in the palm of the hand of his gf. "What?" He squeaks. She looks down at him relentlessly with a big closed smile. "I'm just glad I met you."

[–] moriquende@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

proceeds to squash him with her head

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)
[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago

"Gimme some forehead baby"

[–] BetaBlake@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (10 children)

4chan proving it's incel ground zero, those unfuckable virgins are a bane on society.

Maybe work on yourself and stop hating the world for your own problems.

[–] TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (6 children)

My qualm with "working on yourself" advise is that it is too broad and non-specific, which I think makes a person even more confused. There are so many little details that a person may miss in relation to themselves. It requires a lot of introspection. But even then, even if the person does a lot of thinking, the conclusion may be wrong. For example, the guy does work out and believes he will attract girls; but if he doesn't realise he's got bad breath and got turned down for it, it could lead to the wrong conclusion for him that women in general are just mean, or whatever other wrong conclusion that the guy could draw from.

I've seen guys struggle with dating, even good looking ones, but most of the time it is because they struggle to figure out the finer details. However, the problem is that it is hard to broach the topic because it may offend the person. Each individuals are unique and as much as we are all unique in our own good way, it also applies that we are all uniquely flawed. We have to figure out the latter and rectify it without putting ourselves down. But even the process of rectifying one's own self can be challenging, because introspection could lead to unhealthy conclusions and behaviours if not done in healthy manner.

I don't know if it makes sense, but that's just my two cents based from my personal experience and what I observed about others. I think many men are struggling because they don't get specific enough advise. There is no "one size fits all" advise for men in dating and relationships (if there is, unfortunately the broad "one size fits all advise" are easily used for exploitation by those who could influence, as we saw with Andrew Tate and others). But as I mentioned, providing specific advise to individuals is a hard thing to broach.

[–] conicalscientist@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Yep. "Work on yourself" sounds right but where's the rest? Nobody has an answer except the far right who use that as an opening to groom them into the incel politics/culture war army. Usually the answer from everyone else is "figure it out yourself". Because you're supposed to be a big man. And men just figure shit out.

That's a traditionalism that is still being upheld. Especially by left leaning. It's not very progressive to uphold traditional gender stereotypes is it. These are guys that need help. And you tell them "work on yourself" in other words just figure it out bro. Oh, they figure alright. Figure right into the very thing you all hate so much.

As you said these topics are hard to broach. Why then does "clean your room" and "take a shower" come so easily from a certain type of person.

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago

If the left wants to help men grow I’m all for that. Until then, I’ll enjoy my right wing friends who give a fuck about me, value growth, and encourage me to take on responsibility.

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[–] kshade@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

ITT: People who apparently never had an intrusive thought getting awfully judgy about someone's immediate feelings.

Decency is to not act on negative emotions and impulses, not never having them.

[–] ameancow@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

On the other hand, the act of sharing this response without also sharing a method of resolution and/or a framing or context that makes it a passing feeling and not a "harsh reality about current society" or whatever your brain will try to attach to, just provides miserable people yet another rumination topic to get lost down.

For healthy adults, you learn how to manage or avoid rumination. For people without social experience, without a healthy level of emotional intelligence, and especially without good, involved parenting, a young mind can take a post like this and just get absolutely lost down the rabbit-hole of negative validation. Seeing someone in the community you connect with sharing a feeling that your already depressed brain can latch onto is a recipe for depressive contagions.

Get your teenagers off the internet people.

[–] kshade@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

That is true, neither shaming people for how they might feel in the moment nor sharing it without context is great or helpful.

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