this post was submitted on 12 Oct 2026
929 points (99.0% liked)

Programmer Humor

33796 readers
1853 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 35 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] slazer2au@lemmy.world 66 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Of cause its magic. We are pumping electricity into rocks to make them think.

[–] Beartotem@sh.itjust.works 42 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You forgot to mention the tiny intricate runes we cover the slice of rock with.

[–] flilare@lemmy.zip 18 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] nilloc@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 week ago

Then we harness lightning to bring them to life.

[–] copacetic@discuss.tchncs.de 57 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Programming is the closest thing to magic we have. Incant the right words and you can do nearly anything.

It doesn't stop being magic just because you know how it works. -Terry Pratchett

[–] Malgas@beehaw.org 19 points 1 week ago

++????++ Out of Cheese Error. Redo From Start.

-Terry Pratchett

[–] heartSagan5@lemmy.zip 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)

“Anything sufficiently advanced technology can be mistaken as magic.” -Isaac Asimov (paraphrased, not precise quote)

[–] Malgas@beehaw.org 5 points 1 week ago
[–] mcv@lemmy.zip 5 points 1 week ago

Of course that also means that any technology that's distinguishable from magic is insufficiently advanced.

[–] goatinspace@feddit.org 51 points 1 week ago
[–] kibiz0r@midwest.social 28 points 1 week ago

“Definitely not occult magick. Just gotta use cat to trace lines for my headless daemon and track down this zombie orphaned child. Maybe there’s something in the journal about what it bound to before the memory pool told it to sleep. … Why are you looking at me like that?”

[–] JcbAzPx@lemmy.world 19 points 1 week ago

It's called sufficiently advanced technology.

[–] Sonotsugipaa@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 1 week ago (3 children)

"Nonsense, there's an entire field of science behind computers"
"

"

[–] MoffKalast@lemmy.world 24 points 1 week ago

Least ugly cpp exception

[–] Miaou@jlai.lu 7 points 1 week ago

I could tell what it was before zooming in. Only surprised it's not boost

[–] mrchampion@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Is this the Minecraft font?

[–] Sonotsugipaa@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 week ago

I don't think so, but now that I think about it, it's quite similar...

[–] Sunshine@piefed.ca 17 points 1 week ago

Technology is indistinguishable from magic

[–] heartSagan5@lemmy.zip 16 points 1 week ago (2 children)

It’s just math. The programmers just like playing wizards.

[–] lauha@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago

"it's just math"

Anyone who claims modern smart phone isn't a cursed item is just kidding themselves.

Completely off topic tangent: the people that started the KKK also really wanted to play as wizards. If LARPing and/or D&D were a thing at the time they might not have become a thing

[–] cryowatt@lemmy.zip 13 points 1 week ago
[–] thesdev@feddit.org 12 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Curses is a Python standard library module (for those who like me have never had anything to do with Python).

[–] brotundspiele@sh.itjust.works 25 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Actually, curses is much older than Python. It's a generic library to allow standardized output on non-standardized text terminals. If you see text based user interfaces on Posix systems, you can be 99% sure that it's based on curses (or its successor ncurses).

Developed for C in the late 1970s, it now has bindings for dozens of languages from Ada to Zig

[–] esc@piefed.social 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Do people still use original curses and not ncurses (which is a bit newer than python)?

[–] brotundspiele@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I'm not too deep into the history of curses, but as far as I read, ncurses was just a rebranding of pcurses when a new maintainer took over. And pcurses is an open source clone of curses from 1983.

So whether python or ncurses is newer depends on if you consider the renaming as the birth of ncurses, or the date when its first line of code was written.

[–] Malgas@beehaw.org 5 points 1 week ago

Not just Python. It's a terminal control library for Unix-like systems (originally BSD, but widely ported).

[–] Venator@lemmy.nz 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] brotundspiele@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 week ago

It's a console tool for image manipulation. Basically Photoshop with a command line interface. It's working in the background of a lot of other software for image editing. Though it had problems with an unstable CLI interface in the past, so if you plan to use it in scripts, you might want to look at graphicsmagick which is a fork aiming for a more stable API.

There is also magic smoke if some hardware dies hard enough. :)

!witchymemes@lemmy.world

I like how there's a daemon on my phone thanks to Pegasus II that tells the Pentagon when I am playing with my penis. This is a significant upgrade to the Garden of Eden and I think we should continue on this path as a global community.

[–] saltesc@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Don't forget Suuuupeeer Intelligence by Vibe

Mere mortals exceed these planes!

Yes, exceed... Such is this magic.

[–] glitches_brew@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

Don't forget to use Elixir

import curses

It can hear me? No wonder my code doesn't proc.