this post was submitted on 28 Jun 2026
392 points (98.5% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

40562 readers
3918 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 7 points 15 hours ago

is that a rock?

[–] DoubleDongle@lemmy.world 19 points 19 hours ago (2 children)

As a queer liberal millennial and a professional carpenter who may present very clearly either way depending on context, I would like to point out that the cops also do this but the other way around. You win some, you lose some.

[–] JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca 3 points 14 hours ago

Dude, I love "good ole boy" camo. When I'm working I drive a big F350 filled with shovels and rakes and implements of destruction, wear boots and work pants, and generally blend into the blue collar landscape of semi rural Maine. And it's so fun to watch somebody's face change when they realize I don't hate trans people or Mexicans or libruls, and even better when it dawns on them that I in fact, think they're the disgusting ones.

[–] Archimedes@sh.itjust.works 2 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

You're checking a lot of intersections there, I bet you get massive burritos.

[–] DoubleDongle@lemmy.world 1 points 15 hours ago

If I play my cards right, I can get the big burrito AND get let off with a warning. I just can't wear cute shorts while committing acts of mischief, and washing up before hitting the taco shack may be advised.

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 1 points 15 hours ago

How do you think they got the name double dongle? 😏

[–] socsa@piefed.social 6 points 15 hours ago

The burrito artist took pity on your fat ass.

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 9 points 18 hours ago

care to explain?

Yeah. You should eat it.

[–] EvilBit@lemmy.world 162 points 1 day ago (3 children)

I can explain. The kid ordered everything on theirs, the parent ordered nothing but meat, rice, sour cream, cheese, and extra victim complex.

[–] operationalHazard@lemmy.zip 52 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Ratlimit is a notorious ragebaiter, the posts are actually quite good IMO when you know they're bait

[–] EvilBit@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

Noted , thanks!

[–] iocase@lemmy.zip 32 points 1 day ago (2 children)
[–] ayyy@sh.itjust.works 3 points 16 hours ago

The constipation-inator.

[–] EvilBit@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Wh… where can I get one of those?

[–] iocase@lemmy.zip 6 points 1 day ago

Yeah I felt the same way. My puzzle senses tingled when I first saw it

[–] emeralddawn45@lemmy.dbzer0.com 28 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Toppings and complex flavor profiles are a gateway to other forms of complexity, like complex thought and self-awareness. Dad doesn't want that kind of liberal propaganda being fed to him.

[–] Vespair@lemmy.zip 14 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I know we're joking but like I swear there's at least a little actual true to this

[–] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 4 points 15 hours ago

There's a lot of truth to it. I have a brother who won't eat anything that looks too "foreign."

Unless it course it's one of those things that someone's actually convinced him to try and he liked, so it forever achieves "one of the good ones" status...

[–] i_stole_ur_taco@lemmy.ca 175 points 1 day ago (1 children)

If he’s so liberal, how come his burrito is on the right, hmm?

[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 26 points 1 day ago

Turning point burritos...

...tacos Al pastor?

I know this is a shitpost, but here's the explanation: you can't force people to like you.

You may get off on power trips going to businesses where people aren't allowed to deny you service or return bad attitude in kind, but everywhere else you're a $1000/hour with a forty hour minimum payment in advance work starts after the check clears kind of guy.

[–] lime@feddit.nu 90 points 1 day ago (4 children)

"visibly liberal" == no hat?

[–] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 78 points 1 day ago (2 children)
[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 64 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] ouRKaoS@lemmy.today 34 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I'd like to throw my entry into the ring

Pride Punisher

[–] noli@lemmy.zip 14 points 1 day ago

That shirt goes hard

[–] TowardsTheFuture@lemmy.zip 4 points 1 day ago

Well I’m too lazy to find it for a picture but there’s also this JER shirt I’ll throw in to the ring.

[–] DickFiasco@sh.itjust.works 26 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I dunno man, I see a lot of conservative Republicans out there that also love cock.

[–] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 26 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Yes yes but they campaign cock=bad in public, but do cock=good in private

[–] LuminousLuddite@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Grindr crashes during every GOP convention apparently.

[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 19 points 1 day ago (1 children)

This is just baseless slander.

Gay people are way better at IT than that. Maybe it crashed the first time. But I'm sure their capacity management team are more than ready to take huge loads now.

[–] jmill@lemmy.zip 6 points 1 day ago

I know you kid, but I saw news stories about it crashing during multiple events, and I halfway think they decided not to reinforce the network to prevent it, lol.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] lyralycan@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 day ago

Probably a woman

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 73 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That's a burrito? From the opened bit, I thought it was a big russet potato.

[–] toynbee@piefed.social 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That's a particular kind of wrap. Or at least particularly prepared.

If you get a burrito in that wrap you know you're in for a good time followed by at least several hours of groaning and hating yourself. Then wanting another.

[–] absGeekNZ@lemmy.nz 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

followed by at least several hours of groaning and hating yourself

What the hell are they putting in their food?

[–] toynbee@piefed.social 6 points 1 day ago

Not a lot of self control, I can tell you that.

[–] fonix232@fedia.io 39 points 1 day ago

Clearly Chipotle thought your liberal son can handle more meat than you.

[–] some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world 19 points 1 day ago (1 children)

"Visibly liberal", AKA: younger, healthier weight, healthier skin, doesn't look like a leather bag that was forgotten in the sun?

[–] echodot@feddit.uk 2 points 16 hours ago

I think if you don't immediately start shooting into the air when you walk in that's a big giveaway

[–] kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world 14 points 1 day ago* (last edited 19 hours ago) (1 children)

Went to Chipotle with my wife a few years back (I dont really care for it, pretty bland) and this is the same sort of disparity between mine (left) and hers (right). Also I'm considerably more left than she is, for what that is worth.

[–] Hasherm0n@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

Thank you!

I have friends that absolutely love Chipotle. I can't understand it. It's so over rated and just... bland, like you said. I'm glad I'm not the only one.

[–] ramenshaman@lemmy.world 12 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Damn I want a burrito now

Edit: unexpectedly delightful news. Costco now has low-carb burritos (regular burritos mess up my diabeetus) that are actually pretty decent. Mission accomplished.

[–] Archimedes@sh.itjust.works 1 points 17 hours ago

Be sure to dress visibly liberal!

[–] ThePantser@sh.itjust.works 19 points 1 day ago

Explained: Fascist is a lower class.

[–] expatriado@lemmy.world 15 points 1 day ago

if i knew purple hair meant bigger burrito, i would had dyed already

[–] user1234@fedinsfw.app 14 points 1 day ago (6 children)

Those look more like potatoes than burritos

load more comments (6 replies)
[–] whereitsat@lemmy.zip -2 points 15 hours ago* (last edited 15 hours ago) (1 children)

this post highlights how the tortilla and the baked potato are similar in that they're just empty vessels waiting to be filled by fixins; in less ideal restaurants this expression of culinary freedom is known as a 'a bar,' but this is based on hearsay since i'd never set foot in a place like that.

i think this is a profound statement on culture and class that will, no doubt, go over the heads of many reading this.

we all love sour cream no matter what race we are, what culture we belong to, and i think that's absolutely insane if you think about it, that we are capable of liking the same things despite differences that seem important if you think beyond sour cream. how can such a simple food bind us together?

i never actually thought about why it's called sour cream before it was dolloped on a traditional taco bought in a border town in mexico when i was visiting to purchase an inexpensive crown--this is when the sour stood tall against the savory blend of spices, yet despite this feud they complimented each other, and this nearly broke me because my sheltered palette had never known such flavors--what an astonishing blend of mysterious ethnic spices you'll never find in a packet.

but my smile is a little crooked and they fixed that up for a budget price. it always bothered me to work in a professional environment and not have a perfect smile, i could feel the judgement in zoom meetings although nobody ever said anything. they made really good burritos in _____ , and i'll never forget that just like i'll never forget my perfect smile courtesy of mexico. no more chipotle for me, only food trucks, and i tip my gardener an extra 20%.

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 5 points 15 hours ago

the tortilla and the baked potato are similar in that they're just empty vessels waiting to be filled

Just like me fr fr

load more comments
view more: next ›