Microblog Memes

It's not shoplifting, its an employee discount.

It is 1866. Stores are making record profits while complaining.
It is 1940. Stores are making record profits while complaining.
It is 2026. You get the picture.

i dont even steal from these, i just prefer less interaction and faster checkout 🤷

The complaining is an important part of the theatrics.

I’m gonna be so real, I prefer self-checkout whenever possible. The “employee discount” is just an occasional bonus

Self-checkout or not, minimum wage is not even remotely enough to expect cashiers to be anti-theft enforcement.

They've been experimenting with self-checkouts for decades. When I was a kid, I remember being in a store with my grandma, waiting in line to pay, and an employee kept trying to entice those in the line to come over and try the self-checkouts.

She asked my grandma a few times before my grandma, a proud union supporter, snapped "I want a person to ring me up. I'm trying to save your JOB, young lady!"

And the young woman stopped asking my grandma.

You can only complain about being stolen from if you didn't make record profits.

This is bananas, and this is also bananas... It's odd that all this produce is bananas. Oh well, I'm not trained to tell the difference.

One time, i scanned all of my items and had to wait for someone to check id because it included alcohol. After they unlocked the machine, I paid and left. Turned out that none of the scans registered after the first alcohol item, so i got a bunch of freebies. I'd normally give a shit, but this is how well they trained me and how well their system worked.

The process is perfectly designed to give you the results you got.
-Demming, or someone like him

How do you expect me to tell the difference between organic lionsmane mushroom and a banana?

I don't get why anybody complains about self checkout. I think we've had them for a decade in Poland. Everything works and is much faster than a normal checkout. At this point I'm actually avoiding the few stores that don't have them yet.

Then keep people around to do that job and you won't have these problems you greedy fucking assholes.

I have an issue with telling fancy mushrooms from the cheap brown mushrooms that are coincidentally 1/5 of the price. Its a known problem and it should probably disqualify me from a job checking out produce. Oh well, I guess I'll just do my best.

Dear Walmart, You owe me 4 weeks Vacation pay, and my annual raise. And where is my staff discount???

Sincerely, Customer

I am not paid, i dont do the work.

Also, if the cashier makes a mistake, it is their peoblem. If you make it, they call you thief. Fuck them, i aint no cashier.

Zero training and zero pay. Hmm I wonder if anything could possibly go wrong…

Yeah, "scanning errors", like when it's charging me full price instead of the discount that it was supposed to be on, which would not be as obvious if a cashier scanned it?

I still don't get why you wouldn't get a discount for checking yourself out. No wonder all those high-falutin' CEO's think consumers are a bunch of dumb schmucks. The real heroes are the clerks who "miss" scanning something from time to time.

I know some people think that self-checkout is making the customer do the cashier work for free, but honestly, having experienced it both ways, I'd much rather do it myself. It's not like I am doing anything else at the time, and shopping already involves something very similar, regardless.

I imagine that if grocery stores had started with each person having a personal shopper who picked things off the shelves and pushed the cart around, then if some stores started making people push their carts around themselves, you'd hear the same complaints.

But I am already picking up each item, one by one, when I put them into the cart. To me, it's really not that different to pick up the items one by one, scan them, and put them into the bag.

A bunch of smaller places around me just totally shut down the self checkout. It's actually incredibly frustrating because there will be a line and I could just do it myself and be done. But no, everyone has to wait for a single cashier now because people were stealing. Just make up your mind. Get rid of it entirely or use it.

Zero training and a decent reason not to call any produce organic

I predicted this would happen when our manager brought these in.

It's not that it makes shoplifting easier. It just makes it easier to pass it off as an honest mistake if caught. Sure enough shrinkage went through the roof and their solution was to one way the doors, a divider between them so you are forced to walk through the cash registers on the other side of the store to get out. I'm glad I don't work there anymore.