this post was submitted on 10 Apr 2026
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LinkedinLunatics

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A place to post ridiculous posts from linkedIn.com

(Full transparency.. a mod for this sub happens to work there.. but that doesn't influence his moderation or laughter at a lot of posts.)

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[–] SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world 25 points 1 day ago (1 children)

What’s the point of having children if you are never home to spend time with them?

[–] Rooster326@programming.dev 12 points 1 day ago

Legacy my boy. Trust funds don't spend themselves

  • I’m proud of having no life to be a company stooge, and I’ll expect everyone else to surrender their soul to the grind.
[–] Nangijala@feddit.dk 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I have seen a few examples of people using linkedin to humble brag about their work ethic or whatever and all it ever does is tell me that they aren't actually happy with the thing they do.

I find it a lot more interesting to read or hear stories about projects people have been working on and them telling a little bit about the process. The excitement of them sharing what they have worked on is ten times more interesting than some randy bragging about how much they worked in one day.

Like omg congratulations. I work along hours too. I don't think it's anything to be proud of. Quite the contrary.

[–] paul@lemmy.org 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

People like that are in a constant battle to prove how exceptional they are while being completely unexceptional. They have no real success stories so they have to create some by painting this image in their heads that they are naturally superior to everyone else. Every one of them have Dunning-Kreuger syndrome.

[–] Nangijala@feddit.dk 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

You're probably right, but that is so sad, omg xD

All I can say is that working long hours is soul crushing. I went through an extreme case of that a few years ago, out of necessity.

Worked so much I have like three months from that year that are almost totally blank in my memory. No clue what happened during that time.

According to my boyfriend, at my worst, I worked between 90 and 120 hours a week.

All I know is that I didn't have a social life and didn't have hobbies or any free time. Didn't even have time to breath and have a check in with myself so I didn't know that I was on the brink of losing it before I almost did.

Still paying the mental and physical price for that sacrifice two years later and it wasn't fucking worth it, man. Like at all.

I've had to relearn what it means to have freetime and hobbies. It's going okay in that department! Have gotten my plant hobby back on track and am currently making fugly fridge magnets with stupid faces and googly eyes. Figured I needed something funny to look at when I'm not around a mirror.

We also went to the beach today and collected sea glass, which is basically like meditation, if you ask me!

[–] cabillaud@sh.itjust.works 79 points 2 days ago

1h lunch, that's a lot of time wasted that could have been used for conducting interviews. smh, ppl nowadays don't really know the meaning of commitment.

[–] Smeagol666@crazypeople.online 19 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

The place I worked at 3 years ago, someone forgot to drop their kid off and left them in the car in 90 degree heat (freedumb units). I assumed the guy was overworked as hell; that place did not give a fuck about work/life balance, just like most places I've worked here in the land of the slaves and home of the cowardly.

[–] Hadriscus@jlai.lu 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I can't remember what the conversion is so I'll just assume it's 90 celsius and the son cooked to a nice crisp outside, juicy tender inside

[–] Smeagol666@crazypeople.online 1 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 14 hours ago) (1 children)

90°F, that's outside. Inside a car, it got to over 120°F (probably). The kid died.

[–] Hadriscus@jlai.lu 1 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Well shit, I was hoping for a nice denouement

[–] Smeagol666@crazypeople.online 1 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

The lead forklift trainer tried to perform CPR, but the child was far too gone. I think she had to take a few days off.

[–] Hadriscus@jlai.lu 2 points 12 hours ago

Yea, I would have had to take those days off too. That's gotta be traumatizing

[–] KairuByte@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Did… did the kid survive?

No, they died.

[–] Rooster326@programming.dev 1 points 1 day ago

Some say he is still out there today

[–] CompactFlax@discuss.tchncs.de 37 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (3 children)

14:00-15:00 is the only non-meeting productive work time in the day. 9 hrs of doing interviews seems excessive, but what do I know

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 21 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (4 children)

Also a little odd that he did 6 interviews in 5 hours. How long are these interviews?

Also, as someone who regularly takes his son to daycare (and leaves him there! he needs to learn to hussle his way back home again, I can't be there to helicopter parent!), good luck getting them up, out the door, through traffic, and back to the office again inside 30 minutes.

This guy is doing what I used to get yelled at all the time when I was filling out a time card - block billing. "One task? 1 hr. One hard task? 1.5 hr. One easy task? 30 min."

Clients hate this shit. Real heads know to always randomize a number 1-9 to put in the last digit, so it looks like you actually put in time from a clock rather than rounding to the nearest mark.

[–] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 12 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Clients hate this shit. Real heads know to always randomize a number 1-9 to put in the last digit, so it looks like you actually put in time from a clock rather than rounding to the nearest mark.

My agreement with at least one of my client is that I round up to the next 15 minutes. They know to expect fairly round numbers.

[–] HarkMahlberg@kbin.earth 3 points 1 day ago

At my 9-5, our time keeping software doesn't even let you put in anything smaller than a quarter hour.

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[–] Gloomy@mander.xyz 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 16 hours ago)

I do the morning routine with the twins each morning and it takes me at least one hour, sometimes one and a half. And our daycare is like 5 minutes away by bike.

My guess is that this dudes wife gets the son ready and this guy drives him over. Which is by the way the only time during this day he sees his kid.

[–] andxz@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

It's bullshit from start to finish. Nobody really does hours like this. There'll always be unexpected stuff, it doesn't matter what the job is. You could be President (with an actual serious schedule) and there would still be odd minutes here and there.

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[–] MisterD@lemmy.ca 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)

FYI. LinkedIn is owned by Microsoft

[–] desertdruid@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 2 days ago

it's microslop now

[–] rem26_art@fedia.io 197 points 2 days ago (3 children)

treating the IRL daycare like the daycare in Pokemon. If you come back to the daycare years later, you'll have a lvl 100 kid

[–] webghost0101@sopuli.xyz 95 points 2 days ago (2 children)
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[–] crunchy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 2 days ago

And an egg that they swear they have no idea how it got there

[–] Mirshe@lemmy.world 10 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Cue "Cat's in the Cradle"...

[–] dejova281@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

“When you coming home dad?…”

[–] almost1337@lemmy.zip 33 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Also only walked the dog once

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 16 points 2 days ago (1 children)

22:00 - 22:30 Walked Dog

22:30 - 00:00 Cleaned up piss

00:00 - 2:00 Cleaned up piss

2:00 - 2:30 Cried

2:30 - 3:45 Cleaned up more piss

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[–] Etterra@discuss.online 16 points 2 days ago

I was gonna say, that poor, poor dog.

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[–] projektilski@lemmy.dbzer0.com 26 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I was thinking, where is your quality time with your child, but the comment is way better. :)

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[–] blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 37 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] blockheadjt@sh.itjust.works 28 points 2 days ago

Maybe he lost consciousness picking up his son from daycare and crashed into a bus, then got uploaded to a new body by the next item

[–] pixxelkick@lemmy.world 53 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I mean for what its worth, if the dude has a partner they couldve just picked the kid up, its not exactly unheard of for one partner to do drop off and the other do pick up... kind of a lukewarm take here.

[–] merc@sh.itjust.works 32 points 2 days ago (11 children)

And the partner did minor things like:

  • get his son dressed and feed him breakfast
  • give the dog its morning walk
  • go to work
  • come home from work
  • pick his son up from daycare
  • give the dog its afternoon / evening walk, bringing the toddler along to spend some quality time in the park
  • make and serve dinner for him / herself and the son
  • give the son a bath and get him ready for bed
  • read the son a bedtime story

But, I'm sure that everything there other than work would have taken what, 1-2 hours at most? Minor things.

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Just take the joke my god

[–] mech@feddit.org 16 points 2 days ago (3 children)

She forgot him due to brain fog, from only eating lunch and a snack every day.

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[–] HarkMahlberg@kbin.earth 20 points 2 days ago (10 children)

Funny, but hardly "escaping containment" when the screenshot was doctored to begin with.

The screenshot in the OP, realigning words to show that the font sizes are different from line to line.

[–] asqapro@reddthat.com 11 points 2 days ago (1 children)

The post is from this Threads account: https://www.threads.com/@finance.arman

I couldn't find the post because I don't have a Threads account myself and it limits how far back on someone's timeline you can go, but the UI and username matches. The original post wasn't in English, so it must have been translated using OCR, resulting in the weird artifacts. You've got a good eye to catch that difference.

[–] HarkMahlberg@kbin.earth 5 points 2 days ago

Ah, see that at least sounds plausible. I've used Google Translate to translate road signage with the camera, and it tries to position and resize text to fit the original sign. So if that kind of technology is happening here, that could make some sense.

...but then why wouldn't you just let the browser translate it for you, since it would normalize the same font size across the entire text? Oh, if they were in the Threads app they wouldn't have they available.

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