this post was submitted on 09 Mar 2026
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[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 79 points 1 week ago (5 children)

Sorry, that’s a v1.18.345 hamster so your sacrifice won’t work as your router only accepts v1.2.829 or higher.

[–] jellyfishhunter@lemmy.world 35 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Stupid router. v1.18.345 is the higher one. The hamster must have introduced breaking changes if they're incompatible.

[–] helpImTrappedOnline@lemmy.world 29 points 1 week ago (1 children)

No, v1.2 is the higher version. The full name is "hamster gen 3 maxpro v1.2"

v1.18 was the final version of "hamster gen 3 maxpro first edition."

[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I was gonna say that the hamster is too new and the router can’t parse minor versions with two digits in it, but I like your answer better.

The actual solution is to flash it with OpenWRT

[–] four@lemmy.zip 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)

How do you flash OpenWRT on a hamster? Asking for a friend

[–] defaultusername@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] helpImTrappedOnline@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago

Thank you, this solution worked perfectly.

[–] Maxxie@piefed.blahaj.zone 21 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Hello I accidentally sacrificed Hamster Pro Max to my regular Pro router. There weren't any warnings or errors it just took its soul, and now when I turn it on the light flashes red 3 times and for a few seconds I can see the eighth circle of hell where Diviners are forced to walk backwards blinded by their own tears.

What I want to ask is, can I extend the timer to at least a minute? This super cute witch winked at me, but when I try to ask her out all I hear are screams of the damned and then the connection goes down please help me.

[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Fediverse threads are not a valid support inquiry channel. Please write your question in blood and burn it under the full moon to submit a support request.

[–] Maxxie@piefed.blahaj.zone 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I can't do full moon, is there an option for lycanthropycally-challenged?

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 8 points 1 week ago

As an alternative, please download and print out a picture of a full moon and fax your blood to us in a PDF

[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

For valued customers like you we have an accessible support system. Just submit your blood-written note on the 29th of February.

Notice: server upgrades are scheduled 2/28 and will be competed 2/30. The accessible support system will be unavailable during this time, please use the regular support system. We apologize for the inconvenience.

[–] einkorn@feddit.org 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

But v1.18.x is higher than v1.2.x? 🤨

The 18th update of version 1 vs the 2nd update of version 1.

[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Please search before asking questions.

Either this is the Hamster pro max v1.2 v18.345 which is different from the Hamster Max v1.0 or the router can’t parse two digit minor versions because it’s too old.

[–] einkorn@feddit.org 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

But I demand instant answers to my question regardless of the quality of my writing skills and in total disregard of time of the day?!

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[–] python@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

ugh didn't you hear about the CVE affecting v1.2.823-1.2.967 though? Those hamsters had missing input validation which could be exploited to overflow the buffer size and execute remote inputs. Your router is basically toast at that point.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

Is that a Qualcomm chipset? Sorry bud, you're gonna have to wait 8-12 business decades for that firmware to be supported.

[–] stupidcasey@lemmy.world 37 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

You guys, WiFi isn't magic it's science so you must sacrifice a Scientist.

[–] Zorque@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)
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Does it have to be a good one or will one that's shilling for fossil fuel interests do?

#TwoBirds #Efficiency

[–] Hupf@feddit.org 3 points 1 week ago

So the hamster is magic?

[–] saltesc@lemmy.world 30 points 1 week ago (4 children)

I dunno when it became the norm to say the WiFi's down when it's actually totally fine and unrelated to the internet connection being down.

People at my work have said this even though they're using docks plugged with Cat 5.

[–] florge@feddit.uk 14 points 1 week ago

Probably because ISPs like to fob you off with suggestions of poor wifi rather than address the actual internet issue you contact them about.

[–] tiramichu@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Non-technical people don't have any idea what a LAN is, and can't imagine any reason for WiFi to exist other than to get their device on the Internet.

So WiFi becomes a synonym for "Internet connection", perfectly interchangeably.

[–] veroxii@aussie.zone 2 points 1 week ago

And in most operating systems the wifi icon turns into some other error icon if there's no internet. So I can see the confusion.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Cat5? Not even Cat5e? You sure the problem isn't just that their connection is 10Mbps or worse and we sites aren't just taking a couple minutes to load?

[–] saltesc@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yeah, e. Just didn't bother with the variance. Though, could even be Cat6 for all I know, never looked.

Almost just said Cat but figured that may confuse people. Our engineers keeping the network purring like a kitty.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Probably should have just said "Ethernet"

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[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 19 points 1 week ago

Is the Wi-Fi down, or is Internet access down? Because you're probably gonna need a gerbil instead of that hamster

[–] Asfalttikyntaja@sopuli.xyz 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Have you tried to turn it off and on again?

[–] ekZepp@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 7 points 1 week ago

Oh, the machine god is down again.

[–] pedz@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Wifi being down is just a minor inconvenience for tech oriented people. Spare some lives and just contact your local geek/nerd.

[–] vithigar@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Or just learn how the god damned devices you use work.

I do not understand how it became so normalized to just not bother with knowing how anything works. It's not like this is a new thing either. So many old jokes surrounding people's VCR clocks not being set.

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[–] purplemonkeymad@programming.dev 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Internet down? That's ok I have stuff on my jellyfin.

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[–] Bytemeister@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

Your wifi probably isn't even down. Most of the time its your ISP and you just don't know the difference between WiFi and internet.

[–] damnthefilibuster@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Rogers is down right now and I’m this close to grabbing the neighbor’s cat to do this.

[–] IrateAnteater@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 week ago (2 children)

First of all, fuck Rogers with a rusty statue of a cactus, and second, fuck them again.

I don't understand how a company that big can be that bad at uptime. I moved to Teksavvy years ago and haven't had any outages since. I refuse to do direct business with any of the big three.

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[–] homes@piefed.world 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

If you it’s your neighborhood cat, then it’s probably only cat 1 or cat 2, so it won’t be of much use to you unless you wanna play Zork on your local community college’s mainframe. That might work.

Back in the day, the fuzzy ones had to sacrifice bandwidth for cuteness.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[–] ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one 5 points 1 week ago (2 children)

You must appease the Machine Spirits.

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[–] TheObviousSolution@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 week ago
[–] chefdano3@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 week ago

Most importantly is the timing of the bell tolls. Once before drawing the circle and placing the candles, Twice as you are placing the sacrifice, and thrice while singing praise to the tech God.

[–] MehBlah@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

Don't worry. The magic 'may' return.

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