this post was submitted on 15 Dec 2025
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Science Memes

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top 33 comments
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[–] panda_abyss@lemmy.ca 77 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Nanook@lemmy.zip 8 points 2 weeks ago

But I kept reading anyway. This is HQSP

[–] muhyb@programming.dev 56 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] nova_ad_vitum@lemmy.ca 12 points 2 weeks ago

Related question: where can I voluntarily get a lobotomy?

[–] bhamlin@lemmy.world 50 points 2 weeks ago

Am doctor, can confirm: you should not be reproducing.

[–] abrake@lemmy.world 44 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

This is only scratching the surface of the weirdness of semen retention advocates. Throwback to the Canadian political candidate who advocated for this a few years ago:

"Every time you're tempted to ejaculate, every time you're tempted to go watch porn... You are essentially in the fight for your life. You're fighting for your very lifeforce. Nature's forgiving, and because of nature's merciful nature, we've taken advantage of that nature and now we're depleting," argues Nakula. "Right now the world needs men. Men with full balls," said the PPC candidate in a YouTube video.

Source: https://thepostmillennial.com/ppc-candidate-calls-himself-a-semen-retention-soldier-claims-he-can-breathe-through-his-testicles

“Breathe deeply into your balls," he wrote on Instagram. "Imagine your testicles expanding like lungs. When you exhale, imagine your testicles deflating like your lungs would". “Most men never breathe into their balls consciously,” he added.

Source: https://www.dailystar.co.uk/news/world-news/politician-says-men-should-breathe-25021657

[–] theneverfox@pawb.social 54 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Learning to read was a mistake

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 24 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Experts are divided between those who think we never should have left the trees, and those who think we never should have left the oceans.

As an armchair scientist myself, I think we screwed up leaving the singularity of the big bang. Inflation and baryogenesis were a mistake.

[–] Railcar8095@lemmy.world 26 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move.

Why half of the best quotes on the internet are either Adams or Pratchett's ?

[–] fossilesque@mander.xyz 3 points 2 weeks ago

Pretty positive thats Adams.

[–] AwesomeLowlander@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I think the mistake was in teaching these particular people to write

[–] P1k1e@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Naw man, this is great!!!

[–] shittydwarf@piefed.social 22 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Well in his defence, most men do never breathe into their balls consciously..

that's why blowjobs are so important

[–] militaryintelligence@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] psud@aussie.zone 1 points 1 week ago

Some people have a very strong opinion that wanking is bad, probably a sin too. They'll make up whatever they need to, especially now as they need to fight the advice that regular ejaculations protect against prostate cancer

[–] Soup@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

Of course he was PPC lol

[–] lath@lemmy.world 36 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Semen gets internally recycled to keep it fresh.

[–] TranscendentalEmpire@lemmy.today 44 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Yep, and if you don't use them the body will break down the sperm and absorb it. So op is basically advocating young men to absorb fat loads into their bodies.

[–] some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

The male body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down

[–] guy@piefed.social 11 points 2 weeks ago

Judging by the state of the world, a little too recycled these last decades

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 24 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] nova_ad_vitum@lemmy.ca 5 points 2 weeks ago

The one thing they could have made Shepard read that would make him invite the reapers invasion.

[–] P1k1e@lemmy.world 22 points 2 weeks ago

Pee is stored in the ballz

[–] Tja@programming.dev 20 points 2 weeks ago
[–] Sibshops@lemmy.myserv.one 15 points 2 weeks ago

As one of of the wasted semen, I can confirm.

[–] answersplease77@lemmy.world 13 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

does his balls have secondary storage where sperm is stored seperately for 72 days until it's mature? or does he have to wait 72 days without nutting for his sperm to become mature? how does his body not ejaculate during wet dreams for 72 days? at what age would your body stop having wet dreams and not ejaculate for 72 days?

[–] fossilesque@mander.xyz 11 points 2 weeks ago

It's called a sperm cellar and it's classy.

[–] caradenada@feddit.cl 5 points 1 week ago

That's why you have two balls, duh.

[–] ryathal@sh.itjust.works 13 points 2 weeks ago

This is clearly wrong. It only takes 36 days, since the boy and girl nut alternate their maturity cycles.

[–] quediuspayu@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Wholey shit! I had no idea.

[–] vrek@programming.dev 12 points 2 weeks ago

Wholey shit only occurs if you do anal

[–] fossilesque@mander.xyz 1 points 2 weeks ago