CREATE VIEW NiceList AS
 SELECT * FROM Children
  WHERE behavior = 'nice' 
   AND parent.income > 40000; 
CREATE VIEW NaughtyList AS
 SELECT * FROM Children
  WHERE behavior = 'naughty';

[–] NullPointerException@lemmy.ca 66 points 2 weeks ago

The income is a nice touch.

[–] criss_cross@lemmy.world 30 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The poor kids can’t even afford coal and fall through the cracks.

[–] laurelraven@lemmy.zip 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Only the nice ones, the naughty poor children get free coal

[–] naeap@sopuli.xyz 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

But not the poor nice ones

[–] RustyShackleford@programming.dev 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The poor nice ones get beaten by the naughty rich ones.

[–] ulterno@programming.dev -1 points 2 weeks ago

... and by the "nice" rich ones.

[–] KairuByte@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Why are we using magic strings for behavior?

[–] joyjoy@lemmy.zip 28 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Feel free to fork my comment.

[–] Tja@programming.dev 11 points 2 weeks ago

Does Santa accept PRs?

[–] uranibaba@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

CREATE VIEW NiceList AS
 SELECT * FROM Children
  WHERE behavior > 2000
   AND parent.income > 40000; 
CREATE VIEW NaughtyList AS
 SELECT * FROM Children
  WHERE behavior <= 2000;

[–] TheOctonaut@mander.xyz 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

It's an ENUM and other people have to read this fucking codebase too, Brian!

[–] Olap@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I've a DBA who would insist on this being in a dimension table and using a foreign key constraint instead of just a fucking string

[–] luciferofastora@feddit.org 5 points 2 weeks ago

I like your DBA!

Users probably don't.

[–] djmikeale@feddit.dk 10 points 2 weeks ago

He used to have an is_nice bool but consultants convinced Santa it isn't future proof enough to capture the nuances of kids behaviour in today's world, such as "nice but always is really smug about it". But the consultants kept making PowerPoints instead of updating the backend, so now Santa also has added a new value to behaviour: "consultant-like"

[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

You forgot the join smh

[–] joyjoy@lemmy.zip 5 points 2 weeks ago

Omitted for brevity.

[–] Willy@sh.itjust.works 5 points 2 weeks ago

stop static “variables”! use COL. congress should do the same for setting minimum wage. eg parent.income > COL

[–] menas@lemmy.wtf 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

which default currency shall santa use ? Dollar have no sense, if presents are free. However Yuan may ease things with providers.

[–] joyjoy@lemmy.zip 8 points 2 weeks ago

He's in the north pole, so probably Canadian dollars, Russian rubles, or Danish krone (Greenland)