this post was submitted on 24 Apr 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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[–] gigastasio@sh.itjust.works 194 points 20 hours ago (2 children)
[–] Zkuld@lemmy.world 89 points 20 hours ago (6 children)

Same way we decide which animals to eat and which to pet I guess

[–] Prathas@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago) (1 children)

Pet/food decisions are mostly based on carnivore/herbivore type. Eating carnivorous animals poisons us over time, among other issues. Video about it: Why Predator Meat is Literally Poison (It's Not What You Think)

[–] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 1 points 58 minutes ago

How on Earth is it poison...

[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 2 points 6 hours ago

Just depends on how hungry you are.

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 66 points 20 hours ago (4 children)

No no no. I would eat a cow. But I would also pet a cow.

I guess it depends if it's alive or dead.

[–] FatVegan@leminal.space 2 points 4 hours ago

They were all alive at some point

[–] X@piefed.world 3 points 5 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago) (1 children)

Living cow: i pets moo cow

Freshly dead cow: no pets 4 u cow

[–] Asfalttikyntaja@sopuli.xyz 2 points 5 hours ago

A living cow: pet pet -

With my axe!

Then dead cow: yummy looking beef steak.

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 45 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Pet the bovine cadaver coward.

[–] rob_t_firefly@lemmy.world 8 points 18 hours ago

Mmm, beef patty.

[–] applebusch@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 15 hours ago

oh hey a cute living cow pat pat

dissociates

oh hey a yummy looking dead cow

[–] Janx@piefed.social 6 points 19 hours ago

First one, then the other! The order is important...

[–] j_z@feddit.nu 2 points 18 hours ago
[–] Eat_Your_Paisley@lemmy.world 2 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

There are no animals I wouldn't eat or pet

[–] moakley@lemmy.world 6 points 20 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Warl0k3@lemmy.world 13 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

They're really unpleasant to eat - much like a tarantula they're basically all exoskeleton and that makes them a bit like chewing a big mouth full of fried peanut shells. But flavor-wise the meat is actually pretty tasty!

[–] toxicbubble@lemmy.world 1 points 18 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Warl0k3@lemmy.world 8 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago) (1 children)

It's 2026, doesn't everyone eat ass?

[–] X@piefed.world 1 points 5 hours ago

I’d pet them if they aren’t angry but I can’t say I’ve thought of eating donkeys. Necessity of survival, perhaps?

[–] sik0fewl@piefed.ca 2 points 13 hours ago

^ my joke but better