The Monkey's Paw

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Want to make a wish? Just ask the Monkey’s Paw! No strings attached.*

Just create a post that starts with “I wish ___”. Other users will then grant you the wish, and probably not how you intended.

^(*)^ ^Strings^ ^definitely^ ^attached.^ ^Satisfaction^ ^not^ ^guaranteed.^ ^Wish^ ^will^ ^likely^ ^backfire.^

founded 2 years ago

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I wish my own hands could grant wishes (lemmy.radio)

submitted 1 week ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

11 comments fedilink

Humans are members of the great ape family, and apes are a specific type of monkey, making our hands literal monkey paws.

I wish the Moon had a moon. (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

10 comments fedilink

I just think it'd be really neat to look up and see a smaller moon orbiting the Moon. Optionally, I'd also like the Moon to start rotating at a rate of one rotation per day so we can see more than just one side of it.

I wish I could be rid of my allergies (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

8 comments fedilink

I wish I had the super strength of Superman, with my entire body being able to safely deal with the increased forces (programming.dev)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

7 comments fedilink

I wish the thing causing my hiccups would manifest as a physical object so I could beat the everloving shit out of it with a hammer and finally go to sleep. (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

31 comments fedilink

I wish all declawed cats got their claws returned to normal (programming.dev)

submitted 2 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

3 comments fedilink

I wish for two of the best Belgian beers ever made. (infosec.pub)

submitted 3 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

10 comments fedilink

Would really hit the spot right about now.

I wish I could have peace and quiet for a few hours (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 4 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

6 comments fedilink

I wish my hippos were less hungry hungry (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 4 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

11 comments fedilink

I wish the magic hadn't gone away in Star vs The forces of evil. (lemmy.ml)

submitted 5 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

7 comments fedilink

I wish for a bowl of extra spicy chicken curry. (infosec.pub)

submitted 5 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

11 comments fedilink

Would hit the spot right about now.

I wish to no longer receive text messages from various numbers about Ohio politics (lemmy.keychat.org)

submitted 6 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

11 comments fedilink

I wish my new water bottle contained an infinite supply of ice cold drinking water. (infosec.pub)

submitted 7 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

5 comments fedilink

I wish my house cleaned itself (programming.dev)

submitted 7 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

11 comments fedilink

I wish for servers at restaurants to always bring my tea or water with lemon already included, without me having to ask for it separately. (infosec.pub)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

3 comments fedilink

Save a few words. Make life easier. How can this possibly go wrong?

I wish cows were the size of cats so we could have them as pets (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

4 comments fedilink

I wish I could freeze and unfreeze time at will and explore this time-frozen world with my bestie (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 9 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

2 comments fedilink

I wish that every website that works only in Chrome also has to be compatible with Firefox. (infosec.pub)

submitted 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

0 comments fedilink

I wouldn't have Chrome installed if it weren't for those crappy school and government websites that refuse to work on anything else but Chrome.

I wish my body to be in peak human shape no matter what I do (lemmy.keychat.org)

submitted 11 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

3 comments fedilink

I wish my dog could walk himself. (infosec.pub)

submitted 11 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

2 comments fedilink

It would be so much more convenient for the both of us, and then he could go outside, anywhere, whenever he likes.

I wish for Linux to have a respectable marketshare of 20% (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 11 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

7 comments fedilink

I wish I was good enough at football to play professionally (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]