your house no longer allows you inside. you are the source of mess
this post was submitted on 03 Sep 2024
2 points (100.0% liked)
The Monkey's Paw
767 readers
1 users here now
Want to make a wish? Just ask the Monkey’s Paw! No strings attached.*
Just create a post that starts with “I wish ___”. Other users will then grant you the wish, and probably not how you intended.
^(*)^ ^Strings^ ^definitely^ ^attached.^ ^Satisfaction^ ^not^ ^guaranteed.^ ^Wish^ ^will^ ^likely^ ^backfire.^
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
Your house let's you in, however it notices that you are full of dirty bacteria that need cleaning. Now how to reach those nasty bacteria in your gut?
This sounds like something that would happen in the show "Eureka."
Granted. You are now half an inch tall and live inside a human being who showers daily.
Ms Frizzle forgot me on that school trip.
Granted. Your house grows arms from the walls, floor and ceiling and cleans itself. The arms don't go away, and they're seriously creepy.
It grows a tongue and cleans itself like a cat.
Ever see that Soviet adaptation of There Will Come Soft Rains?
The house now excretes all rubbish out the back, which needs to be shoveled into bags.
It will need regular trips to the vet.
Granted. Being truly clean will of course demand sterilization. As part of a daily cleaning cycle the house seals itself and becomes an autoclave. The building becomes pressurized and the temperature is raised to 270 degrees fahrenheit for 20 minutes. You'll probably wanna be gone when it happens.
It will always miss a spot. Different each time so you don't always know where to find it.