Vladkar

Still better than Dragonball Evolution

Whenever I'm asked to fill out a survey, I always just copy and paste the entire text of Dante's Inferno from Project Gutenberg.

One is a goofy pop culture icon from the early 2000s with a reputation for kindness and professionalism, and the other is Ellen DeGeneres.

As a software engineer on the hunt for a new job, it seems like every company hiring right now is one of three things:

• Evil Distopian Nightmare Corporation
• Same, But Also Makes Weapons
• AI Startup Named "Jilquetoast"

Watch out, they might "prank" you by tormenting a homeless person or something

I long to be out there, with my brothers, waging war against the Empire

Oh hi Mark 1:15

A warrior's drink

How I look in the mirror ☝️

How I look in photos:

Nah, that's too realistic for The Onion. It needs to be something like, 'Pandemonium Ensues After Trump Utters First Coherent Sentence.'