Platypus

Half of the time I look forward to my death, it doesn't scare me since I don't see the real point of my life, what scares me is if my agony would be slow and painful.

But then what? I just stop existing and it's like I fell asleep? Do I see light? Darkness? Nothing? What is nothing?

Now I want a tuna 🥪

It's the new "just get to the gym". For many it won't do jackshit plus outside USA this isn't even a thing in some places. Even worse if you're an immigrant, hell, immigrants go sick to their jobs and do extra days just to not get fired, do you think any of them care about "MeNtAl HEalTh"?

Shit, you would probably get mocked for being "weak" NOBODY I know has taken therapy, and I know alcoholics, divorced, cheaters... That's how my world is.

Sometimes alcohol and adult videos, that's my therapy, and I don't see that changing and can't do anything about it.

I've been playing games for almost 3 decades and I've owned almost every Xbox, so the online factor is there and overall easily accessible but I just never got this community feel I read in some places, my most played games are probably WWE 2k14 and Tekken 7 and 8, yet I've never interacted with anyone, I don't have a headset and I don't wanna hear voice or chat while playing though, it just distracts me and I despise losing, but apparently the people connect, make friends and a few even found love while playing their favourite game.

I envy them.

Is like the only hobby I have and tbh it isolated me even more from getting any type of affection or contact.

Some people mention discord but that awful app is terrible plus people act weird there, is like the game is very secondary there and just post cringe stuff instead.

I'm going to be 35 and nothing changes my life has been a boring slow downward spiral. Sometimes I welcome death to take me but unless it's a heart attack I don't see that happening anytime soon. And I don't feel like ending myself.

Still sexless, loveless with literary no friends and with a temp job that I dislike. I just drift in this world, I guess I could be worse, living under a bridge, but I still live with my mother and uncle, sleeping in a minuscule room shared with my uncle (he's another "loser" like me in his late 40s non married living with his sister, my mom). I'm sure y'all heard this before, life is unfair, and it's true, and I'm sure some other people out there are doing worse than me and are better "fighters" in life. But I'm not them, I'll never be them, it's not in me being that type of person.

Btw I'm not saying this just to get a response from you and I don't need a "happy birthday" reply... If anything that would piss me off more due being insincere, you are not my family and you don't care about me in the slightest (and rightfully so). But I just needed to say this to ease my pain.

Now maybe you can understand why I welcome the reaper, maybe you can tell me if you're in a similar situation.

... I just wanna sleep

The reverse of that post I've made a week ago...

Rules: pick one movie or series and explain why you actually enjoyed it despite the criticism.

For me: The JJ Abrams Star Trek movies, by far the best ST stuff ever made, I couldn't take seriously the original universe with the dated effects and stiff acting, same goes for NG... These movies did ST actually great looking and much more believable, not just the effects.

At work, sometimes I take a bathroom break just to escape. Don't use the bathroom, I just wanna stop looking people I don't care about around me and the noise. I'm not physically tired, since the job isn't demanding that way, but mentally I can't stand it. That's the main problem, it's a warehouse so it's inevitable. In a perfect world I would be almost completely alone and the job would be a 15 minutes from my home at walking speed...

Both of it aren't a reality.

AKA how are you surviving it?

Mom and her partner are going to a reunion with some neighbours, get drunk and whatever and invited me but i won't go. I know how those parties are and I hate being surrounded by alcoholic ignorant people and people I don't know... My little bro (16 yrs old) goes out with his friends. My other bro that is 5 years younger than me (he's 29 years old) Will pass the NYE with her fiance and her family in their families restaurant.

So I'll stay in my room alone again. There's no reason to go outside. The stupid fireworks won't let me sleep anyways so I'll play Xbox and watch some p*rn maybe. I know it can be seen as pathetic for some, but that's my reality and I can't do anything about it.

Rules: explain why

Ready player one.

That has to be one of the cringiest movies I've seen, is tries so hard, too hard with it's "WE LOVE YOU NERD, YOU'RE SO COOL FOR PLAYING GAMES AND GETTING THIS 80S REFERENCE" message and the whole "corporation bad, the people good" narrative seems written for toddlers... The fan service feels cheap and adds nothing to the story.

Finally, they trying to make the people believe that very attractive girl with a barely visible red tint spot on her face is "ugly"... Like wtf?

Yet it received decent reviews plus being one of the most successful movies of that year.

I didn't went anywhere and stood in my room 24, 25 and 26 as usual... Why can't I just never wake up... I don't wanna go to work, I hate the people there but I need money and I most likely get fired at January

Fuck life. Honestly

The fact there's nothing I can't do to hurt him or his reputation in any way pisses me off.