this post was submitted on 29 Mar 2025
288 points (96.8% liked)

Science Memes

14479 readers
2640 users here now

Welcome to c/science_memes @ Mander.xyz!

A place for majestic STEMLORD peacocking, as well as memes about the realities of working in a lab.



Rules

  1. Don't throw mud. Behave like an intellectual and remember the human.
  2. Keep it rooted (on topic).
  3. No spam.
  4. Infographics welcome, get schooled.

This is a science community. We use the Dawkins definition of meme.



Research Committee

Other Mander Communities

Science and Research

Biology and Life Sciences

Physical Sciences

Humanities and Social Sciences

Practical and Applied Sciences

Memes

Miscellaneous

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 92 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I used to date a lady that would, during foreplay, comment that I really needed to ejaculate bad. Not the exact wording used, but it was still a little weird. Not weird enough to break my stride, because it was true enough, and with her working the pieces parts that would lead up such an event, it could have been extremely weird, and I would have been okay with it.

This goes on for months before she finally said, "I don't know how it fills up so fast, we just did it an hour ago.", during a rather busy weekend that included a great deal of ejaculation. I asked her what was filling up so fast. She said "your balls, they just get so big when they're full."

This lovely, wonderful lady had made it into her early thirties under the impression that all of the semen was produced and stored in the testicles, filling them up continuously. She was also under the impression that testicles would rupture if not drained regularly.

She attributed this to something she had overhead someone say in jr high, and had apparently never figured out otherwise.

It kinda makes sense. Why would the sack be so big and stretchy if it didn't need to hold balls that would expand. And why would guys have different sized ones if some of them weren't draining them more often than others.

The ensuing conversation was a difficult one. Partially because it stopped the previous activity, partially because she had a lot of questions, and partially because it wasn't clear if the frequency with which she wanted to prevent my testicles from exploding would decrease.

Luckily, the conversation went very well, and they did eventually explode in the usual way, which was much more entertaining for her than before, she said. It also led to a lot of fun as she developed an almost fetish about feeling the event happen whenever activity would make that possible.

[–] [email protected] 63 points 1 month ago (3 children)

There's a line of perv guys that tell girls that if they don't ejaculate it will be painful and it may cause health issues, mostly as a way of coercing for sex.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

my balls hurt if i go too long without emptying them, yes

is that... not normal?

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Yes but it's the coercion that's the problem.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

yeah like… jerk off then?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

thats fair.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Sure, that's normal

It's calles epididymal hypertension. Aka blue balls.

The blood flow combined with the tension of the tissues caused during the preparation for sexual activity causes the part of the testicles that stores spermatzoa to experience discomfort.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

If you jerk off and don't finish maybe but even that goes away after a bit. Otherwise not really... I've gone weeks and it didn't hurt.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

There are manipulative people, of both sexes, who lie for sex.

That being said, Epididymal Hypertension (aka blue balls) is a real thing and not an urban legend only used to manipulate people.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

As I would say: Buddy, there's your hand and there's the bathroom and if you need it, here's the wifi password.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Sure, it doesn't entitle anyone to sex.

I was just pointing out that it's just not as simple as "That's just a thing people say to guilt trip others into sex."

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago

Wholesome sex story.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

This totally made my day. Thank you!

[–] [email protected] 54 points 1 month ago (3 children)

When two people kiss, they form a long tube from one anus to another.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 month ago (2 children)

While two people, sitting on toilets interconnected by sewer pipes, form a long tube from one mouth to another.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I'm not sure you're supposed to form an air-tight seal around the toilet bowl, but if your farts are that bad then thank you for your consideration

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

sewer systems aren’t air tight either - they need to let gasses escape, so i think even without an airtight seal if we consider a sewer in general a pipe system of this category it’s fair to consider the connection between butt and toilet also part of this system

many people have a special wireless connection, which explains the sewage that spews from their mouth

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (2 children)

if you have more than one toilet you can start a LAN party

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 38 points 1 month ago (1 children)

From Robin Williams describing the reproductive system ....

"What was god thinking when he designed humans? .... let's put the waste disposal system next to the entertainment system!"

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Don't even get me started on breathing and eating through the same set of tubes

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I'm convinced this is how I'll die, I regularly get it down the wrong hatch and some day that piece of chicken or whatever will just be a bit too big to get it out/in again... Now that I think about it, it hasn't happened in a while, maybe just so I let my guard down...

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago (12 children)

Meanwhile, there have been very rare instances of women getting pregnant from getting fucked in the ass.

Hey, some people have subtle deformities allowing fluids and such to travel where they usually don't..

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago

Transanal-transvaginal fistulae. That was a bad day to have eyes, or the ability to read. Ah well.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

No more poophole-loophole :(

load more comments (10 replies)
[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (2 children)

And that, is why it feels good to fart.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago

The poor man’s orgasm

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago

It wasn't random, it was intentional 🙃

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

A comma can be used to improve readability, but it can also indicate a pause while talking. I feel a pause after "and that" is as common as no pause. That said, I cannot know if that was the poster's intent; it's only my interpretation of the usage.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I honestly would've thought that an orifice to release waste products came first, but I'm not an evo-devo-nist.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Yeah, the first thing the embryo of vertebrates folds into is a torus whose hole will become the digestive system. Reproductive organs come way later.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

So very early in our development we’re just an asshole. Some people apparently never make it past this stage.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah it feels like a weird way to say that humans still have vestigial signs of a cloaca. It's understood that evolutionary ancestors did, so humans' ancestors would need to have separated the functions during their evolution... I guess the news is that there is still genetic evidence even today.

Alternatively, creationists can take this as a sign a creator considers butt stuff to be natural sex also 👍

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (3 children)

i think the creationist response is that humans were always exactly like this and any evidence pointing to the contrary is put there by god to test us

… but also worth a try - it’s not like they actually think about things

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (2 children)

God doesn't make mistakes 😇🙏 that's why butt stuff 🍑🤛💦 feels so good 🥴😩💯

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

I really commend the creativity and dedication to detail the graphic artist took on this spectacularly breathtaking image.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (2 children)

WHO ARE ALL THE PEOPLE ASKING THIS QUESTION???

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

The anus may have evolved from a hole originally used to release sperm

But whose sperm are we talking about here?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

What is it with vertebrates and combining reproductive organs with the out-end of the digestive system? Don't they get it's gross?

load more comments
view more: next ›