this post was submitted on 10 Feb 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] mdd@lemm.ee 142 points 1 year ago (2 children)

EU citizenship with no hassle?

Hell yes!

[–] ripcord@lemmy.world 57 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yes, sign me up. I'm ready. Right now. Seriously. Do they want money?

[–] nomy@lemmy.zip 43 points 1 year ago

This would be the biggest mass migration to California since the last one.

[–] darklamer@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 points 1 year ago (3 children)

No hassle? I think you severely underestimate the effort required to learn Danish.

[–] Droggelbecher@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Wouldn't be the first bilingual EU country.

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[–] nobody158@sh.itjust.works 115 points 1 year ago (14 children)

Can they buy oregon and Washington too?

[–] TallonMetroid@lemmy.world 30 points 1 year ago

As a Cali expat in Washington I approve of this.

[–] MegaUltraChicken@lemmy.world 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Don't forget Colorado, we have lots of drugs!

[–] toiletobserver@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago

I support this sale.

[–] ChillPenguin@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I volunteer Minnesota as well.

[–] Limonene@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Wisconsinite here. I'm hoping the great lakes area is occupied by Canada after we lose WW3.

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[–] Takeshidude@lemmy.world 47 points 1 year ago

Don't threaten me with a good time

[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 35 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yes! California native here. We accept.

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 13 points 1 year ago

$1 is a pretty good deal.

They should have charged, honestly.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 34 points 1 year ago (1 children)

California accepts denmark's bid. Please.

[–] supersquirrel@sopuli.xyz 9 points 1 year ago

Honestly Washington State is the one I'd buy, but given the weird conservative obsession with beating up on California you can probably get a better deal.

[–] tunetardis@lemmy.ca 26 points 1 year ago (6 children)

Darn, I was kind of hoping for a viking raid of Mar-a-Lago followed by some pillaging up and down the gulf coast. Get some pirates back in the Caribbean and rename the Gulf to something even more obnoxious.

[–] BillTongg@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Well, the vikings reached the east coast of what is now Canada in around the year 1,000, but they were Norwegians, not Danes. They never got any further than New Brunswick, but who knows, if they visited Florida perhaps they would have stayed...

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[–] inv3r5ion@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 1 year ago

Gulf of calypso (from pirates of the Caribbean)

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[–] Bluefalcon@discuss.tchncs.de 26 points 1 year ago

Lets go Danes!

[–] baggachipz@sh.itjust.works 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I would kill for some hygge right now

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's not very hygge of you.

[–] baggachipz@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 year ago (3 children)
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[–] meowmeowbeanz@sh.itjust.works 22 points 1 year ago (2 children)

The sheer absurdity of this "news" piece perfectly encapsulates the late-stage capitalism circus we’re trapped in. A real estate fire sale of cultural landmarks? Only in a world where oligarchs treat nations like Monopoly properties and influencers mistake clickbait for journalism. Hollywood’s already a hollowed-out shell of corporate algorithms—selling it to Denmark would at least spare us another superhero reboot.

Propaganda outlets peddling geopolitical fanfiction while actual democracies crumble? Classic misdirection. Meanwhile, the same clowns who’d auction Yellowstone to Saudi princes for a tax break are now cosplaying as statesmen. It’s not satire anymore—it’s a diagnostic manual for civilizational collapse.

Social media’s algorithmic abyss keeps amplifying this narcissistic delirium until reality itself becomes a glitchy deepfake. Unplug the servers before someone Tweets Greenland into the ocean.

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[–] iltoroargento@lemmy.sdf.org 22 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

"I, for one, welcome our new Viking overlords."

edit: "

[–] adarza@lemmy.ca 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

still ain't gonna win a super bowl.

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[–] sundrei@lemmy.sdf.org 21 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Yes please. If you could finalize the deal before April 15 that would be very helpful.

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[–] glimse@lemmy.world 20 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Ok so the Danes get the west, Canada gets the north, Mexico gets as much of the south as they want, and the rest can be The United States Of Trump until it gets destroyed

[–] Deceptichum@quokk.au 16 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Can you give some back to the First Nations people?

[–] Peppycito@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 year ago

Sorry, we're still only breaking treaties.

[–] glimse@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

I wish. Unfortunately none of the governments staking claims give a shit about them.

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[–] FoolishSage@lemmy.world 18 points 1 year ago

I hope they change the name to Hyggewood

This just in population of California grows by approx. 277 million people.

[–] ieatpwns@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

What’s hygge

Edit: that warm cozy feeling

[–] BastingChemina@slrpnk.net 11 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Maybe France would be interested to buy back Louisiana as well.

This is the "Louisiana" they sold: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/57/Louisiana_Purchase.png/1600px-Louisiana_Purchase.png

The Louisiana refund

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[–] gonzo-rand19@moist.catsweat.com 11 points 1 year ago

Can I offer you some hygge in these trying times?

[–] littlewonder@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

I like how this underscores what a joke they think Trump is.

[–] _cryptagion@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 year ago

Friendly reminder that there are quite a few red states that literally would not survive without the tax revenue from California propping them up.

[–] SiblingNoah@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

Please! Please do it!

[–] Noite_Etion@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

Please let this happen.

[–] synae@lemmy.sdf.org 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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[–] ZMonster@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

The pitch is a bitter response to President Trump's plan to purchase Greenland, which Denmark currently owns.

Jesus titty fucking christ how obliviously ignorant do you have to be to not realize the satirical nature-...

the-sun.com

Oh, nvm when will the boomers fucking die already

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