this post was submitted on 31 Jan 2025
527 points (98.2% liked)

Programmer Humor

27882 readers
1970 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
Feyter@programming.dev
anzo@programming.dev
BurningTurtle@programming.dev
pylapp@programming.dev
527
We Are Against Animal Testing (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 10 months ago by cm0002@lemmy.world to c/programmer_humor@programming.dev
20 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 
all 22 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 26 points 10 months ago (2 children)

I'd argue the end-users are animals. Primitive at that

[–] logging_strict@programming.dev 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Hmmm ... Thought it was agreed to not to say the quiet part out loud eh?

No one likes being insulted ESPECIALLY when it's true.

This is why we praise them and spin every statement in a positive light.

[–] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 10 months ago (2 children)

This is why we praise them and spin every statement in a positive light

"I admire your creativity, but no we do not currently allow emojis in usernames"

[–] logging_strict@programming.dev 5 points 10 months ago

"I admire your creativity. Will talk with our team, get their feedback, and timeline. See when can add support for emojis in usernames"

[–] logging_strict@programming.dev 3 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Just got back from talking with our team. The senior coder in charge of emojis in usernames is currently upgrading the windmills in the uk, having been able to enhance efficiency by 0.001%. Wow! Thats 14 Mega tons of CO2 removed from the atmosphere every year!

Will take the weekend to get commercial Fusion energy rolled out and right after that will address your issue. Which i'm sure many other users will be thankful you brought to our attention. And luckily had the right man for the job on staff. He's amazing, capable, enthusiastic, and eager to help.

[–] mkwt@lemmy.world 24 points 10 months ago

Medical device programmers:

[–] F04118F@feddit.nl 16 points 10 months ago

Animals are individuals, servers are cattle!

The Vegan GitOps lifestyle

[–] somegeek@programming.dev 10 points 10 months ago (1 children)

We test on humans

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 10 months ago

You work at Unit 731? I did, for a while, but the employee break lounge was always out of coffee. Not that I drink coffee, but I still thought that was disrespectful to the torture staff.

It's called dark humor, leave me alone.

[–] EABOD25@lemm.ee 9 points 10 months ago (3 children)

I too oppose animals testing computers. They have no clue what they're doing

[–] introvertcatto@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 10 months ago

Idk, I love when rabbit beat me in Call of Duty

[–] logging_strict@programming.dev 2 points 10 months ago

i'm opposed to Grandma asking for IT support

Grandma gets a smartphone

[–] logging_strict@programming.dev 1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

They live along with us.

  • a bulldog gets onto a treadmill

  • a dog is trained to press buttons on the floor to express their desires

  • AI is used to decipher an animals language meaning and speech recognition

  • Koko the gorilla using celebrities to do marketing and guarantee TV time and our attention.

All these things are animals using tech.

[–] EABOD25@lemm.ee 0 points 10 months ago

I said computers

[–] bandwidthcrisis@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

But is the software written by developers with access to the outside and daylight? Even if they prefer to shun it and choose blackout curtains.

[–] milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 3 points 10 months ago

Get your code from free range developers. The ethical way.