this post was submitted on 30 Jan 2025
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[–] [email protected] 45 points 2 months ago (1 children)

How many donuts could a baby eat in one year? Not that many. Five?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago

They can't know whether the baby actually eats them. The baby could be buying them for their parents, after all.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Hurray for childhood obesity!

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Since nobody seems to have read the article:

Following the unusual birth, Krispy Kreme has offered Dallas, and, more pertinently, his family free doughnuts for a year and will throw Dallas a birthday party every year until he’s an adult.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Das gonna be a fat baby

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Put those donuts in a blender, pop the results in a bottle, and the baby will have a full belly. And probably diabetes by the age of 1. But I get the feeling that's not too uncommon in Alabama.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

My good grandma yelled at my mother for putting Coca-Cola in a sippy cup for me.

This is a common quaint anecdote for most people raised in Alabama.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

And before you ask, yes, I do have an evil grandmother. Fortunately, she's dead.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

Just a year?

Fucking cheapskate!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

...starting in a future year, right?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

It’s 2025. Every year is a future year these days

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago (2 children)

What does the FDA consider a year supply when it comes to doughnuts? Or similar group.

I’m thinking if we wanted to be scientific and we’re stocking up a bunker, and wanted to make sure our doughnut supply was appropriate for Alabama standards.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

When it comes to these things of free X for a year/life, it's like 1 free thing, per month. So more than likely, this is 1 dozen doughnuts for free; but you can't get the whole dozen all at once. You get 1 doughnut per month for 12 months.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

I would expect this to be a donut a day, or equivalent.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

2000 calories worth of donuts x 365

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

Hasn't the baby suffered enough?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

It's still the healthiest child in Alabama

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

But......for the next year that number of consumed donuts should be 0.

Wow. I remember when I was a kid, and the NES came out, and I was amazed. Then the SNES came out, and everything improved. Then the N64 came out and my jaw hit the floor.

I said "Wow! Can you IMAGINE what life will be like when I'm old???"

Well. Old me checking in. The future is dumb. I hate it. Please take me back to the late 80s right now.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

If you want it to feel like early Nintendo again, the place to look is VR now. Over the last 10 years, it has been an exciting growth pace to watch. And co-incidentally, some of my favorite stuff to do in VR is play Nintendo games in 3D.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

Starting them young.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

You okay, Gulf Coast?

[–] [email protected] -2 points 2 months ago

KK about to be glazed