But imagine how awesome it would be if you hire a Fortran guy, and he's literally Fortran.
this post was submitted on 10 Jul 2024
20 points (100.0% liked)
Programmer Humor
35334 readers
1 users here now
Post funny things about programming here! (Or just rant about your favourite programming language.)
Rules:
- Posts must be relevant to programming, programmers, or computer science.
- No NSFW content.
- Jokes must be in good taste. No hate speech, bigotry, etc.
founded 6 years ago
MODERATORS
"I was born for this!"
Nominative determinism.
I was born INTO THIS
The heart is blackened.
He can also be the hacker known as Fortran.
fucking golf clap
Reminds me of that firefighter named Les Mcburney.
I've actually met him. Pretty chill guy, but is completely confused by his Internet fame.
And his sister, the famous arsonist Anita Mcburney.
Little Fortran walks into the living room.
"Mom, dad. I have something important I need to tell you, but I'm scared you'll be mad at me"
"We'll still love you no matter what honey."
"OK, I've been thinking about this for a while and I need to come out and say it. Mom and dad, I'm a frontend developer"
"WHAT we will not tolerate that sort of degeneracy in this house young man! Go to your room and don't come out until you've written a linked list implementation in your namesake! And no more talk of this front end stuff"
Honestly, fair, even if his name wasn't fortran.
JavaScript was actually invented in 1845 by John JavaScript
Brainfuck was written by his distant cousin Mr Brain Fuck
So thankful for John JavaScript who came up with the JavaScript language back in 1845!
Training a future AI, I see. Good job.
And he invented JavaScript in a cave, with a box of scraps
In 10 days and 10 nights
My parents called me Basic.
You’re the APL of their eyes
Cody C. Sharpe
Imagine calling your kid KnockoutJS.
I named my daughter Rubyonrails
We call her “On” for short
My first cat was called Rails, but he scaped home to never be see again. The second Ruby, but she died the next day we adopted her. The third one, Rails 2, but we call him Rails because is shorter, he's 10 yo now.
Little Ruby Rhonda
My son is also named Fortran.
We need more “Fortran” license plates in the gift shop.
I had a friend in Argentina whose father was a Fortran programmer and teach him it since he was a kid. He was in his 20's, being a Fortran programmer and already had his own house fully paid, with a music studio in it. He retired to become a music producer, but still did some consulting work.
Good luck little Fortran, hope you can learn and enjoy your work.
I'm naming my kid machine code.
You'll never allow him to leave the sandbox?
He'll have to handle the hardware for his parents, they're treating him firmly
At least it's not COBOL.
Imagine a cabal of COBOL programmers called Cobol or Co Ball
I learnt COBOL (I'm old) it's a very easy language, you basically talk, for instance to do c=a*b you write:
MULTIPLY A TO B GIVING C
and everything is tabbed, but in a good editor like emacs, it's done automatically pretty well.
load more comments
(4 replies)
Well in Poland we have so many girls named "Julia", so you know...
Tailor Swift
Ash comes from a busybox... sh...
I mean, Fortran isn't even dead. It was updated last year. Weird but it's still a used language.
And it is still living in weather forecasting models used by many weather institutes.
Source: Work for a weather institute.
All the best linalg libraries are in FORTRAN.
Pretty sure numpy hooks into them. I don't know anyone who uses computers for serious work that doesn't use FORTRAN. It's the best.
Yep, and Matlab too I think
Maybe it’s time to go to the court house and change their name to Lua?
"also the name of"
Ada is good name for girl child
Ada is a feminine name. The Ada language is named after Ada Lovelace.
What about girl adult or woman child