this post was submitted on 22 Dec 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] ouRKaoS@lemmy.today 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

How many dicks do I have to suck to prove I'm not gay!?

[–] Shortstack@reddthat.com 1 points 2 years ago

In my case, at least one

[–] Skanky@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago (2 children)

In before someone posts the green text story of a friendship of two straight dudes just being straight dudes having a good time blowing each other

[–] Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 years ago

That doesn't narrow it down as much as you'd think

[–] NikkiDimes@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago
[–] hanrahan@slrpnk.net 1 points 2 years ago
[–] rockerface@lemm.ee 1 points 2 years ago

Real and bi

[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 0 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

Fake: anon has a friend

Gay: literally gay

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Fake because Brad didn't get gay with Tim and anon

[–] festnt@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 years ago

fake because tim is marrying a girl

[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Tim is getting married at ~22?

[–] weker01@sh.itjust.works 0 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Is that strange where you are from?

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Indeed. Here most people are still either getting their education or just starting with work.

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I got married while in school and just before starting my internship. Going through school married is awesome.

[–] fibojoly@sh.itjust.works -1 points 2 years ago

The time in life where you're most likely to experience sexuality and get laid. And instead you spend it exploring sexuality with a loved one. I mean... it could have been worse.

[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee -2 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Yeah, I'd say so. At 22 the human brain isn't even fully developed. Tim and his wife are children acting out some theatrics inculcated by their (almost always) religious community. Then again, I live in an American state that embraces education and critical thinking, so my assumption is ol Tim is from Utah, or some other regressive theocratic place where they'd rather nip autonomy in the bud and tether young people to a prescribed way of life that hasn't otherwise existed outside of these antideluvian pockets for the last 70 years.

But I'm probably reading too much into it.

[–] relic_@lemm.ee 1 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

This reads like a 16 year old posting a pseudo intellectual argument so they can feel smart.

[–] i_love_FFT@jlai.lu 1 points 2 years ago

"Brain is only mature when it is no longer developing, that is, when it is stagnant and decaying"

[–] jawa21@lemmy.sdf.org 0 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

Is it weird that the most unrelatable thing here for me is that SongeBob existed when anon was in high school?

Edit: a word

[–] TheSlad@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I'm over 30, SpongeBob existed when I was in middle school.

[–] jawa21@lemmy.sdf.org 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Yeah, I'm over 40. SpongeBob didn't exist when I was in high school.

[–] meep_launcher@lemm.ee 2 points 2 years ago

Hmmm with this we can deduce that SpongeBob was created sometime after 40 year olds went to highschool but before 30 year olds went to highschool 🤔

[–] buddascrayon@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

This is where I remind you that 4chan has existed for over 21 years. Meaning that a kid born the day it started operation is now old enough to legally drink in the United States.