"And why was God a swan?"
this post was submitted on 31 Jul 2026
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“I baked you a pie, Mary”
Your underage wife
Not just the ass, but the oxen and sheep, too!
Joseph. The most in-denial man in history.
The O.G. cuck.
* The OMG cuck
Hey man don't kinkshame
Fun fact, the Nicine Creed exists because this question was a legitimate crisis of Christianity. The council of Nicaea determined that Jesus was not created by God but rather "begotten", meaning he was equivalent to God but not the same as God, and has existed for all eternity as part of God
JK Rowling level of world building
Yeesh,what an illustration of the goofy bullshit people make up to avoid fixing what's actually wrong with their belief systems...
Oh, sure. Mock Christianity. But no one bats an eye when Tolkien retcons half of The Hobbit and gives an excuse like "well the book is written by Bilbo and he lied at first".
What's the retcon in the hobbit?
The ring was just a magic ring. And other stuff.
I don't remember anyone telling me that bilbo was the son of God, so I think we can hold different yardsticks here.
Well of course not. Samwise was the incarnation of all that is good, loyal, and holy. Bilbo was just a prophet.
The difference is that, afaik, Christianity has people that believes that Bible is NOT fiction, while nobody thinks that The Hobbit is a historical book.
while nobody thinks that The Hobbit is a historical book.
...yet
Well, I give you that point...
BUT I HAVE A BETTER ONE: •
He also does say it's fiction, no?
Most stories are fiction until some fool believes it hard enough.
I dont think so. The hobbit+lord of the rings are "Tolkien's translation of the red book written by Bilbo and Frodo into English" (not a direct quote). Middle earth is our earth and our history.
I don't think he said "its real bro trust me" like the book of Mormon, but "its real in a fictional real world"
I mean, The Hobbit was primarily written to be a children’s bedtime story. The fact that adults latched onto it was sort of an accident. Tolkien was primarily a linguist, not a writer. He developed several fake languages, and wanted an excuse to use them. So he did a ton of world building, just to have a reason to write song lyrics in elvish and dwarven.
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Once you've fucked the Holy Ghost you know where the magic happens. Definitely not with the village carpenter.
Sorry Joseph I have to cuck you with your virgin wife. I swear this isn't some fantasy of mine
When you cuckslurp after god you get certain powers and also sainthood
cuckslurp
I would have happily gone a few more days without ever having heard this expression.
Then you will probably feel the same about the related term “manbrosia”
Please do not elaborate.
Joseph is a saint?
As an atheist from what I picked up over the years: yes.
Well shit, I sure fuckin hope so. Better be some dopeass fuckin primo certain powers, too, right up there with the motherfuckin seraphim and shit. None of that “shooting spaghetti out of my fingertips” horseshit. If you’re being rude, I can shoot a laser out of my cock.
Well maybe he couldn't the way he does it.
Consistency? Nah! Kind of like Christianity is actually three belief systems in s trenchcoat.
With some sprinkles of other religions traditions to convert everyone easly
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