this post was submitted on 11 Jun 2026
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politics

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[–] shittydwarf@piefed.ca 77 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] defaultusername@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Or RFK-style brainworms from eating a raccoon dick.

[–] _stranger_@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

or cordyceps fungus slowly zombifying him. With any luck he'll be climbing the white house by the end of the week to bloom so a bird eats him.

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[–] nocturne@slrpnk.net 76 points 4 months ago (2 children)
[–] RaoulDook@lemmy.world 12 points 4 months ago

The evil fat orange man archetype.

Lynch really made the Harkonnens appropriately horrific, better than the new movies in this and some other aspects IMO.

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world 6 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Is that a young Gordon Ramsay in the back?

[–] kat_angstrom@lemmy.world 4 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Pretty sure that's a young Nathan Fillion

[–] Kyre@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

That would be a remarkably old looking 13 year old if that was the case. Fillion was born in 71 and this movie came out in 84.

Or it was sarcasm in which case I ate it.

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[–] Kirp123@lemmy.world 64 points 4 months ago (3 children)

If you look at the report they published Trump is listed as being 0.3 BMI points away from counting as obese which is hilariously convenient. On his blood analysis they even put his cholesterol levels as being normal when he's an obese 80 year old that barely exercises.

[–] ji59@hilariouschaos.com 8 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Barely exercises? He plays golf daily!

[–] ajoebyanyothername@lemmy.world 4 points 4 months ago

Driving that golf cart all the way onto the green surely burns many calories.

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 5 points 4 months ago

He's not obese, he's morbidly obese, even by US standards constantly being changed.

[–] ryathal@sh.itjust.works 4 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Cholesterol could be ok, it's about 90% genetic.

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[–] bw42@lemmy.world 54 points 4 months ago (2 children)

That seems like a completely normal amount of medical specialsts needed for a routine checkup.

/s btw

[–] billwashere@lemmy.world 12 points 4 months ago

Next time I go in for my physical I’m gonna ask where my other 21 physicians are.

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[–] Wytch@lemmy.zip 31 points 4 months ago (11 children)

Let's see here, I got the list... Dr. Lao, Dr. West, Dr. Caligari, Dr. Kimble, Dr. Venkman, Dr. Moreau, Dr. Lecter, Dr. Jeckyl, Dr. Zhivago, Dr. Zaius, Dr. Feelgood, Dr. Giggles, Doctor Sleep, Doctor Who, Doctor Strange, Dr. Pepper, Dr. Dre, Dr. Zoidberg, Doc Holiday, Doc Savage, Dr. No, aaaaannnnd... Dr. Evil.

Seems legit. I think he's probably fine.

[–] ThePantser@sh.itjust.works 16 points 4 months ago

He needs to see Dr. Kevorkian, too bad he died.

[–] Hayduke@lemmy.world 11 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Dr Nick Riviera. “…the red thing’s connected to my - wristwatch. Uh oh”

[–] homesweethomeMrL@lemmy.world 4 points 4 months ago

HI DR. NICK!

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[–] Sunschein@piefed.social 6 points 4 months ago

I'm pretty sure it was just Dr. Pepper, but one of the flavors couldn't make it.

[–] Dultas@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago
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[–] mgrecca2026@lemmy.zip 29 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] santa@sh.itjust.works 13 points 4 months ago (2 children)
[–] partofthevoice@lemmy.zip 7 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

That ear is in pinnacle condition though. Must be what they’re referring to when they talk about his health. Not a blemish in sight.

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[–] daannii@lemmy.world 7 points 4 months ago

Weekend at bernies

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 17 points 4 months ago

Whatever he's got, I hope it's really painful.

[–] tenchiken@anarchist.nexus 16 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] thesohoriots@lemmy.world 7 points 4 months ago (2 children)
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[–] TryingToBeGood@reddthat.com 15 points 4 months ago (2 children)
[–] jumjummy@lemmy.world 18 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Try not to get any more doctors on the way to the parking lot!

[–] aceshigh@lemmy.world 3 points 4 months ago

Hey you get back here!

[–] panda_abyss@lemmy.ca 8 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] eddanja@lemmy.world 9 points 4 months ago

They're doing studies to see how he's able to be so healthy.

[–] reddig33@lemmy.world 15 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

22 specialists just for checkups. It must be nice to get that kind of medical care in America. Especially for free.

[–] Zaktor@sopuli.xyz 4 points 4 months ago

Even if it was free to us plebs, having 22 specialists look at you for a "regular checkup" wouldn't primarily be an indication of how great the medical system was.

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[–] tamal3@lemmy.world 13 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

I thought it said "Trump assassinated... "

[–] daannii@lemmy.world 3 points 4 months ago

Wishful thinking 😉

[–] Furbag@pawb.social 12 points 4 months ago

Nobody wants their name and medical career attached to this bloated walking corpse.

[–] homesweethomeMrL@lemmy.world 12 points 4 months ago
[–] dizzle18@lemmy.zip 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Seems a bit excessive to have that many doctors present just to tell you you're dead within a year. Maybe they're all there to take bets on what finally takes him out. Will it be his heart? A stroke? Choking on a Big Mac? All of the above?

[–] BeardededSquidward@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Definitely going to suffer a massive coronary event in the next 2-3 months I bet. He's actually stressing out because so many hate him, even amongst his former base, he thought a war with Iran would be easy, his own party and base are starting to realize this isn't good. Add in what we've seen and heard of his medical issues, his ticket is about to explode.

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[–] bigbangdangler@reddthat.com 9 points 4 months ago (1 children)

More doctors than anyone! Everyone is saying it. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

[–] Zaktor@sopuli.xyz 4 points 4 months ago

More doctors at checkups, more dementia tests, and more medical visits than anyone. He truly is the healthiest person there is.

[–] OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world 8 points 4 months ago

I hope he dies soon.

[–] MartianRecon@lemmus.org 5 points 4 months ago (3 children)

'We're in the Endgame now.'

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[–] green_goglin@thelemmy.club 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

That’s a lot of gynecologists.

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 6 points 4 months ago

Need some for the neckgina.

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