this post was submitted on 12 Apr 2026
206 points (98.6% liked)
Funny
14621 readers
576 users here now
General rules:
- Be kind.
- All posts must make an attempt to be funny.
- Obey the general sh.itjust.works instance rules.
- No politics or political figures. There are plenty of other politics communities to choose from.
- Don't post anything grotesque or potentially illegal. Examples include pornography, gore, animal cruelty, inappropriate jokes involving kids, etc.
Exceptions may be made at the discretion of the mods.
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
I like how everyone is just listing mental illnesses.
At least we're all in good company...
Transmissible spongiform encephalopathie
The ability to be tranquilized by coffee, durability, not having to eat much, and disease resistance.
Massive dong
The ability to fall asleep in 10 minutes flat.
Depression and beer.
ADHD
Insatiable appetite for whiskey, meat, and boobs.
Also shooting fire from his mouth, but I think he's already got that covered.
Procrastination
An endless fount of Star Trek knowledge.
Name every episode from memory. Bonus points if you know the exact length of each episode. (This is a joke, please don't actually do it, I would feel bad.)
class consiousness
Gender dysphoria :3
Choose your own adventure
mtf
Sad because she's very cute already.
ftm
Sad because he's so handsome already.
He can forget what someone is saying to them whilst they are still saying it, even if he is trying to pay attention.
"I'm sorry, I forgot the first part of your sentence before you finished the last part of your sentence. Could you please repeat that?"
He just starts questioning his choices and he is not even sure he should finish out the rest of the adventure
Procrastination.
Stole mine!
I'll add starting projects that never get finished.
PTSD
Diabetes
It depends on the day. If it’s a Ritalin day, he can do anything while feeling an unending and uncontrollable sense of doom. Aware of everything, processing it all, waiting for all those uncontrollable things to kill him.
If it’s a Ritalin-free day, he’s an oblivious himbo that just eats fast food and fucks around all day.
He becomes a "Sheldon" without any of the positive traits.
Depression and an unfortunate amount of knowledge on cults.
BPD. Kirby now has BPD.
Same :/
Speaking Esperanto.
ADHD
Anxiety
He can now hold his whiskey better than people twice his weight. Dont try to keep up with me.
IBS
Insomnia
Autism
Hummingbird phobia.
Ability to silent faster than others speak.