No Stupid Questions

I recommend a cockapoo or cavapoo.

Ours is 5. She loves to snuggle. She loves to play. She's particularly good with our 2 year old nephew who was afraid of dogs, she is very gentle and patient with him (obviously we need to sit poised and ready to intervene as he can be a bit clumsy).

They also make amazing proximity alarms. If anyone so much as dares walk by the house she's up at the window barking her little head off (mainly because she sees a friend she hasn't met yet).

Anecdotal evidence being what it is, trends have smaller dogs being more prone to biting -- small dog syndrome. Bigger dogs can be dicks if they're raised poorly, but are less prone to bite.

Go voltuneer at a shelter and walk dogs for them first. I don't think you've considered how much work is involved in a dog, are you prepared to adopt a small child?

If you get a small dog, do not use the small size as a justification for not training your dog. That is absolutely my biggest pet peeve with small dog owners.

Having a dog is a magnet for other dogs on walks. They often want to say hi to each other, sometimes they're dicks about it.

I have a small dog and it's a bunch of work. He barks when left alone for too long, needs a walk twice a day. Food, water, vet, meds and I'll eventually have to get him put down. I like my dog, I'm happy to give him a good life, I'm not planning on getting another.

Don't assume smaller means safer. When I was volunteering at a shelter regularly, everyone there agreed that small dogs were more likely to attack than big ones.

You aren't over thinking it. For the reason(s) you stated, I would recommend against getting a dog right now until the underlying concerns are addressed.

Hopefully you will never have to experience a traumatic situation involving a larger dog, but if you do and you aren't prepared, then you are at much higher risk of putting yourself or your companion animal in harm's way or even making the situation worse than it would have been.

I'm a small dog owner. More than once I've had to kick or punch an out of control dog to keep my small dog safe. Running to safety is not always an option, and you cannot outrun a crazed monster singularly focused on murder when you've got to grab your dog first and/or carry it while running.

Honestly, a lot of pet owners are just plain terrible. The fact that you're at least putting thought into this puts you orders of magnitude higher than sooooo many other potential pet owners. Unfortunately, those shitty owners seem to be everywhere.

Dog are like kids but better and more clingy. If you want a dog you need to be ready to educate it

If I were you. I'd just not get a dog. Maybe its me being lazy, but don't need to put so much effort into that. Including the therapy, u less its really affecting you regularly.

No. You want something that is convenient... dogs are not convenient. They are a responsibility, and they do not have a 'good personalities' or 'bad personalities' that is something the dog learns from you.

Way too many people adopt dogs without adopting the responsibility of being a good dog owner and the work involved in owning a dog. And when issues happen, they refuse to resolve them or confront them.

I will give you my experience since it reminds of yours.

When I was about 4yrs old I was at the park with my father and sister. Someone let their pit-bull off their leash and it ran through the park. It found me. My dad had my sister on his shoulders at the time, playing, so he didn’t have much leeway during the event. The dog chased me in circles multiple times around my dad until the owners finally came. The dog never bit me, but the trauma was set. I could not be on the same sidewalk as any dog. I would force my parents to cross the street. I lived in a city, so you can imagine how annoying that was.

Fast forward a few years. My aunt was visiting in town and dropped off a surprise. A brand new puppy (in hindsight them accepting this dog was probably a gamble, but maybe they were banking on me not being afraid of a puppy). It was some kind of labrador mix that stayed really small. The dog terrified me at first, but it was a puppy and it needing us really helped me with my trauma and anxiety. I had two more dogs later in life, a shih tsu and a beagle mix. All three were great dogs. The last one came from a shelter. One thing to keep in mind is that dogs have personalities. If you are getting a dog from a shelter you’ll need to feel out who matches you.

I still have massive anxiety around large dogs, especially pit bulls or any of the Police favorite breeds. Only you will really know if you are ready, but this is just me telling you it is possible to not be afraid of smaller dogs and own one, while still being afraid of larger ones. In terms of being a dog magnet, just cross the street if you can while walking the dog.

When you go to a shelter there will absolutely be large dogs and small dogs of all temperaments, some in kennels and some free-range if they have the space. That being said, as someone else commented, perhaps try volunteering at a shelter! You can do good work and get lots of exposure to all types of dogs, and learn from experienced people how to get a read on dogs and how to handle different situations. Also, shelter dogs tend to act a little differently when they finally get a nice home environment — their personalities really come through when they get some love and stability.

I see others have mentioned it, but I'm also thinking you should have more dog exposure before committing to one. Stop by a shelter or pet store (don't buy from a pet store) and just go look at the dogs. If you see one that seems chill, ask to take it out and hold it/play with it for a bit. If it's too overwhelming, just give it back, go back to looking from a safe distance, and try again when you feel ready.

I suppose I'm afraid that having a dog myself would be like a magnet for other dogs while on walks that I might be uncomfortable with or that my being nervous could make a normal meet and greet go poorly.

Yes. Also, your dog will pick up on your nervousness and either get nervous themselves or become defensive, neither of which are ideal and could make for a bad situation if you're ever at a park or out for a walk. Dogs are little copycats when it comes to mirroring their owner's anxieties and behaviors, and even if you deal with your anxiety, the dog may have adopted it in the mean time and you'd have to work to repair that damage.

Basically, you're smart to be asking these questions before taking on the responsibility of adoption. I'd recommend waiting until you've worked out your issues before potentially passing them on to your four-legged friend.

I find smaller dogs are much less chill, but why adopt a dog in the first place?

I'd hold off until you actually feel comfortable handling a dog. You can volunteer at shelters or babysit a friend's dog or something, but you'll need to train your dog, and being afraid will make that a lot harder.

Training a dog is one part training yourself. Your dog will look to you for guidance, so it's helpful for a professional trainer to show you how to communicate with your dog. There are private trainers, but the most affordable method is in a group with various other untrained dogs.

I agree with what everyone else said. I wanted to add that socialization is very important for dogs. You can have a happy dog without socializing, but they can become dog aggressive or generally scared of other dogs. That can be a huge inconvenience if you ever need to board them, do group training, or have them around dogs belonging to friends or family. The vet can be even more stressful, and you're more likely to have issues while walking if your dog is reactive to other dogs.