9 mentions in the files: 1 story about someone stealing his watches, 1 matrix joke, 1 mention of 47 Ronin, the rest are duplicates of promotional material for an acting class listing him as a former student.
Phew, looks like he's clear.
this post was submitted on 04 Feb 2026
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Microblog Memes
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I was hoping if he was in there it was like Norman Finkelstein was, but this is okay too.
Really? Call me rape me?
Not exactly wholesome
If we could make a new political party, and just call it the American people's party, and make it a genuine party for genuine people, I feel like Keanu should be the parties nominee for president, followed by Jon Stewart
If you vote for the person you would want to be your boss, the country would be a lot better off.
Most people wouldn't want a vindictive, lying, cheating, could raping, fraud with no actual talent, skill, strategy, or empathy as a boss.
Keanu's Canadian, so.... You could become the 11th province?
(this is meant as light-hearted ribbing aimed at someone who clearly wants to see their country go in a better direction, I hope it's taken as such)
I would totally sign onto that if my taxes get me healthcare
Honestly, Minnesota, Wisconsin and Illinois are waaaaayyyy closer to joining Canada than you'd think
Fortunately or unfortunately, Canada isn't ready to accept them. It would require a major change to our Constitution, and opening that can of worms for major revisions isn't going to happen (history with Quebec, they never signed on the first time and were forced into it, two attempts to renegotiate failed, they had three referenda on separating from Canada...)
Take me too! (Washington)
What is this pro-Keanu propaganda?
I like the idea, but, join APP seems like maybe not the best acronym.
It's better than the American Socialist Society.
Join ASS!
It does have a ring to it.
Either join APP or have ASS! If they've aroused your curiosity, check their websites! Just google ASS site!
Instructions unclear.
Now I have a human centipede.
It does indeed have a ring
That mascot is taken
I've thought that too, but then again, in a near future where any opposition ideology may be persecuted, it would actually be an ideal acronym. It would be confusing for AI to parse when the usage is entirely context based. The false positives would ruin anything collected
lol I don’t think dystopic ai surveillance is going to meaningfully ruined by an acronym
Valid point.
…..ya, you know me…
And there's the chant
You down with A-P-P?
Yeah you know me!
Well, farmers want a city slicker.
There's probably quite a few famous people in the Epstien files who were just paid to make an appearance or speech or similar at an event before he was infamous...
Yeah, the guy had a real fetish for surrounding himself with smart people, especially considering he was (based on the evidence in the files that have been released so far) a remarkably dumb person.
It's as if a well-connected person knows/communicates with a lot people. Weird to call social networking a fetish.