this post was submitted on 28 Dec 2025
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I remember when I was moderating a Reddit subcommunity about NSFW all-women clips, and somebody left a rude comment on a butch lady’s submission because of her appearance. She tried to be diplomatic by telling him(?) that “it’s not for everyone”, and I joined in with “Have you ever heard of the expression ‘If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all’?”, but this guy wasn’t having it.

While I think that the rude commenter was a guy, I’ve seen this sentiment from other types as well. When I lurked the nauseatingly toxic L Chat forum, there were anonymous users dissing butch women by calling them cliché or unattractive, saying “I want my women to look like women”, and so on.

Let me be clear: if the femme aesthetic is your personal favorite, then cool. I tend to prefer femme looks myself. But being elitist about your preferences and dissing butch women — as if they all had an obligation to look “perfect” for you — is as utterly unnecessary as it is unpleasant. This may be surprising to read, but not every single woman needs to turn you on! You can appreciate them for reasons other than their appearance! And you can keep your unsolicited feedback on their appearance to yourself! It’s so easy that even I can do it!

I know that I should have let these memories go, but maybe expressing how I feel about them would help with that. That concludes my rant.

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[–] Sivecano@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 18 hours ago

I don't even know why, but it seems to me that there's way too many people out there who seem to think that being into women means you gotta be into all of them. And that the women they don't like are somehow lesser as women.

This is also a frequent talking point made against the legitimacy of trans women.

And I mean, it's pretty clear how a somewhat egocentric and more essentialist worldview with a strong belief in traditional gender dynamics would lead you there.

All women are valid (and valued) regardless of how attractive they are (or aren't) to some incel on Reddit.

not every single woman needs to turn you on!

Right! Do these guys not have mothers, sisters, aunts, nieces... it's a given they mostly don't have girlfriends (and thus daughters) but they should still have plenty of women and girls in their lives they value for something other than sexual attraction.

[–] SharkWeek@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 1 day ago

Muy wife is súper butch, and I think she's the most beautiful woman on the planet.

Especially in summer when she's got her head shaved and rocking the vest / bball shorts look.

In fact, sod commenting on the internet. I think I'll go distract her from playing games and see if I can coax her to the bedroom ...

[–] purplerabbit@piefed.blahaj.zone 14 points 1 day ago* (last edited 20 hours ago) (1 children)

Butch women are rad as hell. And I would like to add another note to that and say that butch trans women are incredibly powerful.

[–] Lobanova@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Butch women are red

Is that a typo?

[–] purplerabbit@piefed.blahaj.zone 2 points 20 hours ago

Yep, fixed it. I use dictation a lot and it messed up. For what it's worth though, butch women make me red. 😳