this post was submitted on 25 Dec 2025
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[–] Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org 157 points 1 month ago (5 children)
[–] TypFaffke@feddit.org 29 points 1 month ago

Biblically accurate Jolene

[–] Velypso@sh.itjust.works 21 points 1 month ago

Jolene, jolene, jolene, joleeeene

Im begging of you please dont raze mankind

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 18 points 1 month ago

Appalachia'll make you understand. They got gods that terrified the paleozoic whispering in the trees over there.

[–] bulwark@lemmy.world 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Now I want a Slayer cover of this.

[–] grue@lemmy.world 40 points 1 month ago (3 children)
[–] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 14 points 1 month ago

Both. Both is good

[–] Mostly_Gristle@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I want Devo to do a cover of it.

[–] Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I want a system of down cover of it.

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I want a Tiny Tim cover of this.

[–] Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You will need a medium for his spirit to possess.

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 month ago

My body is ready.

[–] Pat_Riot@lemmy.today 2 points 1 month ago

Kinda. Kinda the same.

[–] Randomocity@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] drcobaltjedi@programming.dev 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] axexrx@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

Which then leads to this one

[–] ClownStatue@piefed.social 55 points 1 month ago (1 children)

No mater hot beautiful or hot he/she is, someone somewhere is sick & tired of their shit.

[–] 7U5K3N@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I saw a demoticational poster back in the day that said something similar.

Photo of a scantly clad model

Doesn't matter how hot she is... Someone some where is tired of fucking her.

[–] ClownStatue@piefed.social 10 points 1 month ago

Yeah, I’m pretty sure half the dorm rooms in college had that poster. Still, I like the gist of it. Works whether the “hottie” is male or female.

[–] hakase@lemmy.zip 43 points 1 month ago

"It cost a lot of money to look this cheap"

[–] hayvan@piefed.world 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Jolene is not necessarily hotter, it's about insecurity and self doubt.

[–] D_C@sh.itjust.works 22 points 1 month ago

And butt stuff. Dolly was all "no way, exit only" but Jolene was all "grab the butter, let's get messy!!"

[–] Delphia@lemmy.world 24 points 1 month ago

Butt stuff.

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago

If she can take away your man that easily, he wasn't worth your time.

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 17 points 1 month ago

Dolly wrote Jolene AND I Will Always Love You in the same evening. She called it a "million dollar night."

[–] Manjushri@piefed.social 14 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I'm assuming Dolly got the, um... Ahem, upgrade after the Joline incident.

[–] WhiteOakBayou@lemmy.world 48 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Those breasts are actually Jolene. She rendered her down and used the resulting slurry to fill the implants. No body, no crime...

[–] TownhouseGloryHole@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Found the Jolene sympathizer

[–] gothic_lemons@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Jesus now I'm imagining an anime villain that gets increasingly bigger titties from slaying her enemies

[–] criss_cross@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

I mean that’s kinda what happened with Nami and One Piece

[–] Pat_Riot@lemmy.today 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Dolly's tits were not only natural, but she got sick of toting them and got a reduction.

[–] Manjushri@piefed.social 13 points 1 month ago

Not only has she gotten implants she's been quite open about it. She's not ashamed of the work she's had done .

“A lot of what I have done is just cosmetic procedure, but it all comes under the heading of plastic surgery for a lot of people,” she continued. “But I'm not made out of plastic — though I had my boobs lifted when they started dragging on the floor. Who'd want to look at them if they were like that?”

She admitted that she’s had implants, but “only years” after she had lost weight and “had surgery done for the tissue that was left behind.”

“At that stage, in order for them to stand up like little soldiers, you put something in there to help them,” Parton said.

And while she did get a reduction at one point, it was because the implants were too big and causing her back pain.

With breasts that enter a room five minutes before the rest of her tiny frame, Dolly has made no secret of the fact that her 40DDs are man-made or that she’s a frequent visitor to the plastic surgery clinic.

She once famously quipped, "It costs a lot of money to look this cheap!" and noted, "If I see something saggin’, baggin’, or draggin’, I’m gonna have it nipped, tucked, or sucked!"

However, after 30 years of having her trademark assets, Dolly decided to go through a breast reduction a few years ago after suffering excruciating back pain.

[–] TheLeadenSea@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Content not viewable in your region (UK)

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

While Dolly was waiting for marriage, Jolene was putting out. With those dynamics, an enthusiastic 6 can beat an unattainable 9. Presentation will only take you so far, eventually a man wants to dig into the buffet.

[–] GladiusB@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

There's a difference between hard to get and impossible to get

[–] VinesNFluff@pawb.social 5 points 1 month ago

She was a stand user.

[–] HugeNerd@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Sometimes a more tomboyish masculine woman is more attractive.

[–] Dasus@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Sometimes yeah, true. And that might be somewhat true for the role... but not the actress.

For anyone who doesn't remember, her name is literally Jolene.

[–] Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago
[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Jolene wasn't exactly real. Dolly borrowed the name, with permission, from one of their servers who was a teenager at the time. Apparently, Dolly thought that she could easily write a song using that name.