this post was submitted on 20 Nov 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] Schal330@lemmy.world 34 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago) (1 children)

Be me at party having a great time

See fat sweaty guy creeping on a girl and making her uncomfortable

Approach and tell him he's creeping her out

Reach out to pull him away from her

He kicks me in the balls

He says I tried to sucker punch him

He's kicked out of the party

Recover and enjoy the rest of the party

[–] fibojoly@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 hours ago

You didn't get a balls massage afterwards?

[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 11 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago) (1 children)
Be me 

At a party with my gf

Having a great time, enjoying that new beer I brought over

Suddenly I notice my gf across the room, giving me looks to help her

I walk over, some dweeb taking about his latest hentai obsession it some weird shit 

Being a couple drinks in, I try to let him know that he's making my gf uncomfortable with his behavior

Fuck it, maybe he's cool, I offer him one of my beers, let's get to know each other

Out of nowhere here kicks me in the balls. Wtf.

Host apologized to me and kicks the guy out. Shouting about not being a coward. Wtf
[–] rumschlumpel@feddit.org 5 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

That's a really stupid way to format a comment.

[–] fushuan@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago) (1 children)

I mean, it was lemmy's decision to give it code highlighting when no language was specified in the code block. Which highlighting is it even choosing? Python?

[–] vithigar@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 hour ago

It's highlighting "me" as a keyword. The only language I can think of that uses that is Visual Basic.

[–] snoons@lemmy.ca 82 points 7 hours ago

Fake: Anon is at a party, talking to a girl

Gay: Touches some guys balls

[–] MyBrainHurts@piefed.ca 33 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

I love the texts that are clearly just anon's personal fantasy.

[–] Denjin@feddit.uk 15 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

I know! I'd love someone to kick me in the balls...

[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 1 hour ago

Anything planned this weekend?

[–] Nomorereddit@lemmy.today 2 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago)

History is a set of lies agreed upon.