If you're immortal and can't get your hands on a castle or 2 then what are you doing with your infinite time?
this post was submitted on 04 Nov 2025
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“I had a castle, then I got ruined in the S&L collapse in the 80s. I did eat a few of those bankers, though.”
Pretty much what we do in the shadows
I would describe the house they lived in on the tv show as a mansion, which is basically a New World Castle, that basement alone seemed endless
I heard it's ending (or has ended?) with the new season, I am so sad.
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This is what the sensitivity training was about. You can be immortal but still only like 37.
Speaking only for myself, within a year of being turned into a vampire if I want a castle I'm getting a castle.
yhea, because being immortal makes you immune to global financial crisis.
you vamphobic twat.
pursuing the perfect cup of tea
What is this...? Blood?? Again?
Excuse me I asked for a cup of b negative and got oolong how much tea did this dude drink
Oh
If you’re immortal
Yeah can't find any stories that don't have him alive for hundreds of years before the castle.
You know, there's probably a movie in that somewhere...
Dracula beginnings.
Wife dies, leads him to learning dark arts, accidentally turns himself into a vampire instead of reanimating his wife, he works his way up through the aristocracy as an assassin, slowly grows tired of humanity, perhaps a little evil, and slowly kills/controls his way into the aristocracy.
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It’s a skill issue by the 2nd or 3rd generation you live through, honestly.
Vampires are anti-nobility allegories! Dracula is a vampire because he is a count.
At a generalisation, vampire fiction is left-wing (bloodsucking elites preying on humanity), zombie fiction is right-wing (“the peasants are revolting!”)
that is not zombie fiction. what zombie fiction is depicting it like that?
the george romero stuff were about consumerism and brainless shoppers mindlessly spending on crap. the dead rising series (spoilers here) literally has the bad guy be a corporation and the us government and military are complacent in it (the corporation even has an actual cure for zombies but that doesnt make them money like their once a day doses)
also zombies are basically what humans are to animals. seemingly never getting tired and always slowly catching up to you
Vampire fiction being leftwing tracks, but zombie fiction being rightwing doesn't seem as clear-cut. There's definitely a "finally I get to be a real man doing survival-stuff and justifiably kill humanoid beings with personal weapons" aspect to it that feels rightwing, but there's also all the anti-consumerist and anti-corporation themes that are common to zombie fiction.
you forget the queer side of vampire left wing stories. which focus on horny lesbians rather than class issues.
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That's one reading. Another reading is that vampires are bloodsucking foreigners using their exotic charms to tempt and corrupt innocent women into sinful acts. And if a foreign noble is a vampire, then it's justified for ~~America~~ the heroes to depose them. Plus, they found a novel way to weaponise Christianity.
What does that make Frankenstein?
A doctor, didn’t you read the book?
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That's right. Doctor Frankenstein was his father and creator.
It would be rude to refer to the good doctor without the honorific, so it stands to reason if someone mentions "Frankenstien," they are talking about the monster.
Good doctor? No, he was evil, he was the real monster. His creature is the victim
He never got a PhD. Neurotypical screeching.
He wasn't a doctor in the book.
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No, he wasn't. He dropped out. Didn't you read the book?
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Deontology in engineering and applied sciences fiction
Antinatalist maybe? The monster didn’t ask to be born into a world that hates him because they find him ugly, his creator denies him what he views as his only chance at happiness by refusing to make a wife for him, he ultimately kills a bunch of people and then himself because he’s angry at humanity… oh god, is the monster the original incel???
I feel like I've seen a few zombie movies that are critiques of consumerism and unthinking conformist politics, which are not typically conservative themes.
But it's not my preferred genre so I haven't seen many.
I have never ever heard of anyone interpreting zombie fiction as right wing. Like, just look at Night of the Living Dead. Actually, is any zombie movie even marginally right-wing? Zombieland?
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This sounds like something that was made up post-hoc because it sounds good. I have yet to run into a zombie story where they talk about how great traditional gender roles are, or a vampire story where they talk about taking control of the means of production. They are just stories. There is no reason that they need to be inherently political - much less to run along the particular political lines we have in society today.
We could even make the case that the opposite is true - the most common trope I know of in vampire stories is feeling sympathy for the vampire when they have their monologue about how hard vampiring is. And the most common trope in Zombie movies is that the people need to work together, be honest, and sacrifice for each other in order to overcome the hoard.
in order to overcome the hoard.
Those are dragon movies. It’s dragons that hoard things.
Any dragon who would hoard zombies has got to have their self-esteem in the shitter.
At least they last longer than peasants as toys for the brood, and the peasants wind up smelling the same in the end anyway
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I’m pretty sure it was something like “Dracula doesn’t have a castle because he’s a vampire. He has a castle because he’s a Count.”
If this is annoying and pedantic, I apologize. For whatever reason, the original post isn’t displaying for me.
Vampires are classically allegories about scary foreigners spreading diseases and sexual immorality. See Stoker’s Dracula and Le Fanu’s Carmilla for the Ur-examples. There is, however, a really good modern reading of Dracula as healthy queer polyamory vs toxic polygamy. And Carmella is the inspiration for many of the canonical works of lesbian literature.
Eh. It's true that Dracula was a scary foreigner, but he was also nobility, and most subsequent vampire works definitely lean into the nobility aspect instead of the foreigner aspect. Debaucherous nobility is a common theme in works that deal with non-monstrous aristocrats, too.
This is something The Elder Scrolls got right. Vampires could be anyone. The Mayor of a city, the homeless guy in the cave outside of town. You won't know until they find you wandering around at night.
Most fiction that has a society of vampires portrays it this way. It wouldn't make sense for every single one of them to be a count who lives in their own castle.
And just because they're a count, don't assume they have a castle.
Count Notfaroutoe | Discworld Wiki | Fandom https://share.google/wiH9PiHcXPlg9LJLs
Vampires don’t sparkle. Ed just had a weird thing about glitter. Racist.
dracula became a vampire because he impaled too many people when he was count
Vampires still out there working 9-5 to pay for their room in their shared flat
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