"I can't believe Jackson skipped Tom Bombadil! None of this makes sense now."
Sorry, I think misunderstood. She's supposed to say silly, controversial or wrong things, no spit facts.
Seems like they introduced Faramir as a poor reaction to the fans reaction to killing off Boromir. Honestly it should have been the other way around.
"The dragon was the best part of the original trilogy. I can't wait to see the dragons they come up with for the sequels." and when they imply that the story is not so dragon-heavy, pretend you don't believe them and keep talking about how awesome the dragons are going to be.
If they try to explain what a trilogy is, explain to them that "trilogy" is the first part of a story.
If you're still together by the end of Return of the King, state that is was the worst Dungeons and Dragons movie you've ever seen on account of the lack of dragons.
Well, the Balrog is indeed a cheap copy of Smaug
At the beginning:
I’m excited to see how they develop Radagast, he’s one of my favorite characters.
In Moria:
Another dwarven mine? Talk about a plot rehash. Is there going to be a big bad in this one too?
Why doesn’t Frodo just use the ring most of the time to hide like Bilbo did?
When they introduce Legolas:
He was in the prequels, I really liked his romantic story arc.
Near the End of the Two Towers:
This one felt long in the tooth. Did they really have to keep all of that character building?
Near the end of ROTK:
How long was this journey? It took Bilbo decades to be seduced by the ring. You’re telling me it overpowered Frodo in just a few weeks? Why didn’t they just give the ring to Sam? He seems better equipped to handle it. I’ll tell you why. Nepotism.
When they encounter the giant spiders - they had these in the prequel too.
You’re telling me all this time it’s a ghost army that wins this war?
"Why didn't they just get the Eagles to take the ring to Mt. Doom?"
"Tolkien was really bad at subtlety and metaphor. Depicting Sauron as a literal flaming eye is such a dumb literary choice."
"Why does the Balrog have wings when it can't fly?"
"I can see why Martin Freeman turned this role down, they totally sidelined Bilbo."
"Glad to see Daniel Radcliffe finally went back to doing fantasy stuff."
"The CGI in this is way more impressive, you can tell it's come a long way since the original trilogy." use this one to mollify them if they seem too close to violence
Today in our lesseon on how to start a war: the lotr fandom
Refer to the hobbits as Vulcans and Gandalf as Magneto or "Picard's friend." Keep asking which scenes were directed by Ralph Bakshi.
'So when do they get to Hogwarts?"
"Ah, I see the animation frames on that cave troll, this must be the Bakshi scene!"
"Why didn't they just use the eagles"