Mental Health

This is ragebait.

So, what, men should work on themselves instead? Bingo. Perhaps if men weren’t so beholden to ridiculous masculine archetypes and developed a toolkit for processing their emotions, some of this discrepancy would disappear.

[...] You shouldn’t need to rely on women to shoulder the burden of your emotional constipation.

It's no surprise they don't show an author for this. This is someone actively trying to piss men off for engagement.

The link to the researcher's content, which isn't a study or anything doesn't seem to suggest women are giving up dating because of this, and certainly doesn't support that argument above. It explains:

Although men’s loneliness hurts men, their struggles can become a burden for women as well. Ferrara argues that men’s loneliness, a problem thought to be individual, is in fact structural.

"Loneliness tends to negatively impact partners lives too" is fair game for a psychology grad student's thesis (which is what this appears to be), but it's not a surprise. But they clearly point out this isn't an individual problem.

And don't even get me started on their link to the Pew research.It's actually a good read, and explores a lot of very real issues about dating and politics, personal risk, and societal influence... but it absolutely doesn't support any of this article's bullshit. At all.

This is ragebait. Shame on you, OP. Don't share ragebait.

"Articles" like this bs always paint the woman as some emotionally superior creature and the men are just a burden on them, but I've met far more emotionally draining and tedious women who don't have their shit together than men. I say this as a gay man who isn't interested in sleeping with women so I don't have a horse in the race with respect to that.

Can't we just accept that we are all human beings and likely are all flawed in some way and that even if you don't see it, your partner is likely sacrificing and having to put up with your shit just like you have to put up with theirs.

So long as you aren't hurting each other or cheating, you're probably trying to convince yourself if you have to write some kind of dumb fanfic conversation like this to make you feel better about your lack of relationship.

this is slop

Idgi, in every relationship I've been in I was expected to be the emotional support for the woman, but eat my own feelings. Have I had it backwards this whole time? Are you guys getting emotional support while telling them you don't wanna hear about their problems?

I'll have to remember that line, "it's not my job to carry your entire emotional burden." Next time someone who is supposed to be able to love and trust me needs a shoulder to cry on. Like damn woman, we all have problems, find a therapist! Right? I mean I'm over here dealing with my own shit ffs. I'll make sure to tell her I'm not here to womankeep, and that I shouldn't be forced by society to engage in the emotional labor of being there for her.

(Actually I'll just continue being there for those I love even if they aren't there for me as I always have, but this is just the most ridiculous concept I couldn't help but be sarcastic. "Oh boo hoo men want us to be there for them" yeah dummy that's what love is supposed to be, you're supposed to be there for your partner just as they are for you.)

If you need to emotionally dump on your partner all the time just to get by, you should consider therapy. And I'm not saying that needing support is a bad thing and i absolutely encourage it. But there is definitely a difference. And if your first instinct when hearing you should consider therapy is to feel personally attacked, you should probably rethink what you know about therapy. Otherwise you are just going to continue to use women as your therapist instead of actually working on long term solutions with a professional. The purpose of therapy is literally to make your life better. There's this ethos around masculinity where you don't need anyone's help and you should be able to solve all your own problems, but that's just straight up bullshit. The only reason there is a stigma around dudes going to therapy is because of other dudes talking down to each other instead of lifting each other up. And like, 90% of the people you meet in your life will never give two shits about how manly you are and there is no need to cater to the 10% that have a problem with it. And the vast majority of those that have a problem with your masculinity are going to be other dudes.

Edit: Added more details.

This is hilarious. Not only do these poor victimized women expect her potential partner to be over 6 ft tall, earn a minimum of 100k, pay for all dates, listen to their problems, cook, clean, care for the kids, take out the trash, mow the lawn, repair everything, including the multtiple car crashes they inflict, fold the laundry the right way, and take them on multiple international vacations per year, but they also want us to shut the fuck up and keep our problems to ourselves.

And if we don't satisfy all those requirements while avoiding doing something 'ick', they get to divorce us and take half of everything we worked hard to build while being paid over a thousand dollars per month until our children are 25 - often while those kids only get to see dad a couple of days per month.

Yeah. We clearly need to man up... Oh wait, they're also bashing MIGTOW, and lamenting that men aren't approaching them or taking their hints. What's wrong with men, they cry on TikTok!

Why is that? It couldn't be the continuous compaints about creeps approaching them in public or the gotchya tiktok videos of innocent men who happen to be near them in public, could it? It couldn't be the destruction of men's lives by false accusations broadcast all over the internet, could it? It couldn't be the clarion rallies of kill all men or I choose the bear could it?

Wow, these men are so over sensitive!

They need to work on themselves - just don't go your own way! Keep letting the women insult you while begging them to date you. It builds character.

Man, the chutzpah!

Has there ever been a generation of men who wanted to open up emotionally to their friends?

This could be cross posted to !mensliberation@lemmy.ca

Though the article is a bit light on detail