to take care of my beautiful hair
The Onion staff on suicide watch
this post was submitted on 10 Apr 2025
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They have no work left to be done.
He signs an executive order to change things nationally when all he apparently needed was a plumber.
Unless I'm missing something, it was about flowrates in showers and sinks...
Nothing about showers, he's just rambling.
Thank God. Trump is saving America. This is like our #1 problem 💪🇺🇲🦅
Bros over at the guardian knew exactly what they were doing when they chose that picture.
What were they doing when they chose that picture? 🤷♀️
Its a golden shower. A billion years ago a spy paid by Republicans and the Clinton campaign claimed Donald Trump was comprised by Russia via recordings of himself being urinated on by underage Russian hookers. This sex act is frequently referred to as golden showers. A side note is that despite the allegation being children pissing on trump, many late night hosts wanted the pee tapes released to the public; proving yet again no one you see on tv is a good person now that Mr Rogers is dead.
I mean, sure, but that showerhead doesnt look gold at all—looks bronze. lol
I imagine if they were intending to induce a metaphor they would have chosen a more gold-looking showerhead.
the shower head is golden
Is he aware that this will not apply to golden showers?
It can with federally mandated kegel exercises.
His "hair" is so unnatural it's hydrophobic
Not The Onion.
"No need to think about the market manipulation guys I'm getting you more water pressure" - Trump
“It comes out drip, drip, drip. It’s ridiculous.”
He thinks too much about his little pp.
Is there really some issue with plumbing in US or is it all in his head?
I removed the flow regulator from my shower head as it gets clogged by my hard water.
You can put it in a glass of hot watter with couple of spoons of citric acid in it for 5 minutes and put it back, and it will be good again for a month or so
Yeah, i do this with my faucets.
Water regulations are all over the place when it comes to the different states. Sometime in the 90s ( I think it was then ) new regulations were put in place to reduce the maximum allowable water usage per flush of a toilet and the maximum allowed flow of gallons per minute for all plumbing fixtures.
They were put in place to reduce water waste but many people Trumps age disagree with the regulations due to the effect - like he mentioned - of most showers being limited to x gpm and the perceived change in the resultant shower quality.
Like most regulations manufacturers just make stuff that passes the most stringent requirments and sell them everywhere, so even if your state doesn't require a 1.5gpm shower head you might only be able to buy 1.5gpm shower heads.
I think this is what he's trying to change anyway.
Interesting. I live in a place that often has drought but the regulations focus more on agricultural use, swimming pools and public uses like beach showers, fountains and so on. No one is regulating toilets and shower heads. I think it's assumed that everyone gets the same water pressure and that's it, no need to regulated it on a toilet level.
The actual pressure is determined by the height of the water tower in which the water is stored. There are regulations as to the minimum water pressure for safety reasons. I'm my area the minimum pressure is 50psi. The government, at least to this point, had pretty good regulations regarding pathogens and stuff so these rules apply, as others have suggested, to the flow and capacities of various plumbing fixtures.
That's cute that anyone thinks he flushes after himself. He's the kind of dickhead that doesn't even sit down and sprays paste all over the seat and bowl then leaves it for someone else to deal with.
I honestly cannot believe this is real. It seems legit but...
It's so fucking frivolous.
Only if you're assuming benevolence on Trump's part. What if we assume malice? Undermining a country's water security is a big accomplishment.
I'm assuming levels of idiocy. Sure, he's a cruel idiot but this is another level of stupidly pointless. He isn't someone to insidiously undermine water security. He'd just try to deport the springwater.
If he needs to flush 10 to 15 times, he needs to eat more fiber. Maybe put the Mickie Ds down.
Plus water line pressure has absolutely nothing to do with toilet flushing in residential toilets lol. That's purely determined by the tank reservoir and outlet design.
In tonights news, "Authorities are left confused, as old man yells at, then attacks local windmills."
Hope he drowns in all that flow
a golden shower, you say?
Those are unregulated already. Maybe nobody told him?
This has to be a joke
How is it freedom being under high pressure.
This is one of those things I haven't considered thoroughly for other regions. Where I live in Utah there are no water towers and water pressure is practically a fact of life.
Water towers are simply outdated, in most of Europe you don't find any.
cries in the Benches
Lmao I can't even