this post was submitted on 25 May 2026
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"Yea, I picked the power to change reality at my will. I can literally do anything I want. Water is breathable now. Disease doesn't exist. I created a moon base by snapping my fingers and people can teleport to it. What did you pick?"
"Oh, uh... shapeshifting..."
So I don't risk fucking up thermodynamics next time I drop acid and making atoms stop being a thing.
I mean I’ve seen myself “functioning” when I’m a tiny bit high. No way I’m trusting myself with that much power. “Oops, instead of teleporting those guys on the surface, I halfway burried them”
Even shape shifting is dangerous but the worst thing I risk is getting blood everywhere when I flip you off turning my middle finger into a dick thicker than my hand
I would be fuckin impressed though, when that thing fthwamps on the table.
Can't hold game controllers without an erection not practical
I mean the dexterity would be literally fucked up, but imagine smashing your literal dick on a finishing move, while 1v1ing your homie
It would be my middle finger for flipping people off what would I even press with that
Triggers?
How simultaneously large and small are your hands
It ain't the size of the boat, it's the motion of the ocean 😉
I'm more concerned as to how upsetting this might be to modern understandings of physics
If your shapeshifting doesn't break thermodynamics, then you're not able to shapeshift into anything smaller or larger than yourself.
(Though, perhaps, you could stretch it a little by 'cheating' it -- become larger by shifting into a hollow shape filled with air, become smaller by shifting into a shape filled with very dense material. But there are limits to that -- too big, and you'll float away like a balloon; too small and the ground/floor beneath you won't be able to withstand the pressure, so you'll sink down into it -- and you'll never be able to change your overall weight/mass, which might compromise your disguise in some situations.)
Simple. When you shapeshift, your extra mass gets shunted into Z-space. When you need extra mass, mass is borrowed from other masses in Z-space.
Shapeshift into a black hole!
If you've read Watchmen you know what the downside of that power is. Godlike power leads to detachment from the human race. You lose the connection to everything you ever loved, to your humanity.
The worst that being a shapeshifter will do to you is getting you into some kinky sex.
Some versions of shape shifting have very real downsides. Remember Odo from Deep Space 9
Notice how his face looks like it was crudely sculpted out of clay? This is because in the story he's a shapeshifter. But this isn't shapeshifting like Animorphs, where you just have to imagine an image of an animal that you've absorbed the pattern of. That form of shapeshifting is like a menu. You mentally select a form to shift into, and the powers take care of all the pesky details.
But some forms of shapeshifting, like Odo's, don't work like that. You can't just mentally tell your powers "make me look like John." If you want to look like John, you instead would have to mentally picture every single minute detail of John's face and body. Imagine if you had to consciously recall and build up your entire form detail by detail every time you shifted.
This is why Odo looks so odd. His true form is a puddle. Him taking a form is like a painter painting a picture - every detail has to be consciously chosen. Maybe a true master painter could shape shift into a form with a realistic face, but most folks would end up looking like Odo.
It's been a while since I watched it, but wasn't Odo shitty at shapeshifting because he was raised away from his people (puddle)?
Sure. But if you're granted shape shifting powers today, will you have that level of expertise? No your skills would be far below Odo. Hell you'll probably have to spend a few decades as a puddle before you even figure out how to turn yourself into something as simple as a plain cube. I'm telling you, be careful with shape shifting. Depending on the malevolence of the genie or other entity granting you these powers, it's very easy for shape shifting to end up as a fate worse than death.
From what I recall, as the years go by, he gets better at it. In that one where they get stranded on that planet which sends them back in time he's essentially using his "real" face.
True Changelings can impersonate people flawlessly. IE Martok, Doctor Bashir and Chief O'Brien were done perfectly.
He does. And that's the problem. It took him decades just to learn the level of shape shifting given to him in the show. If you end up with Odo's version of shape shifting, it's going to take a similar another of time to master it. Hell, it took him years to figure out the most basic forms. It took him years just to figure out how to be anything other than a puddle.
What did I pick?
Russia.
Funny, I picked the power that makes me unaffected to anything involving other powers.
That house you're sitting in? Boom, now it's a catapult. Gravity is your new enemy.
Was it done by your powers? Then I guess it's a normal house 🙃
You can teleport wherever you want in the universe, but I'll be the snail walking towards you. I just need to find where you teleported from.
I had a stray thought about what it must feel like to be a fish and now suddenly the entire planet is an ocean. I'll try to fix it in a second, at the moment I'm trying to think about how not to drown.
Really, superpowers need a lot of caveats or it's just horrible. Even in comics / cartoons people don't have the knowledge and responsibility to use their powers properly. But, at least those people are given super-endurance and massive plot armour along with their powers.
If someone could change reality at your will, could their puny human brain manage such an enormous power? If someone could shapeshift, could their modified body put up with the stresses of that new shape? Does having the shape of a bird give you a bird's ability to fly -- not just the knowledge but the hollow bones, etc? If someone had super strength, would it follow that they have super skin that won't rip and tear if they punch a wall? If someone could fly, would they run out of oxygen at 10km height? Would they be able to fly up there without freezing?
I picked the ability to transcend physicality and now I'm in a warld of pure imagination, where my ass is even more of a dumpster fire than it already is, because all the air is fire in this warld. I do regret this decision.