this post was submitted on 09 Apr 2026
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Parenting
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I'm not the relevant authority, but I'll answer your question with another:
How often in life do you have to accept something (a "no", perhaps) for reasons that you don't agree with, or find unsatisfactory?
A LOT.
But how would a child understand? Is there no cheat code for this?
One shouldn't have to understand something to accept something. I don't understand furries, but I still accept their validity.
Learning that early will make it easier when one's older. I dated a guy who wouldn't accept anything unless he personally understood it, and it made me feel like I had to defend myself whenever I shared an experience that he couldn't comprehend. One time he wanted to wear a costume that was too small on him and highlighted his junk very prominently... when we were going to a Halloween event at a home for abused girls. Apparently the idea that showing off his junk might be inappropriate in that situation was incomprehensible to him, and after fruitless arguing, I did something I never thought I'd have to do - I told my partner what he wasn't allowed to wear. I just put my foot down, said he's not going dressed like that, and he finally relented.
There are a lot of things any given human will never understand. The important lesson is that even if we don't like and don't understand something, that doesn't mean it's wrong or worth disregarding.
If parenting were easy and there were cheat codes, there wouldn't be so many assholes in the world. Since the primary source of assholes is bad parenting.
Convincing someone of something using reason and logic requires that someone to understand how reasoning and logic work. Children have underdeveloped brains, so it's very hard to convince them with reasons and logic every time.
I'm not a parent, so I can't assure you this. But probably each kid needs a different approach, and you probably have to try a lot of different approaches until (hopefully) one of them sticks. That's what I try to do when encountering someone that don't know how to use logic and reason.
Same.
I don't think there are any cheatcodes for these kinds of things which is why we all end up having to learn them later in life whether alone or in therapy.