this post was submitted on 03 Mar 2026
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The -ard is basically "fucking" + nominaliser (if necessary):
The "nominaliser" part is an artefact of the borrowing, the suffix is from French. Romance languages often use adjectives as if they were nouns, but that doesn't quite roll in English. In turn French borrowed it from Frankish, it's apparently cognate of English "hard".
The etymology of "mustard" is disputed. The first part is likely from Latin "mustum" must; it used to be prepared with young wine. The -ard is typically explained as ardens (fiery, hot). So basically "mustum ardens" hot must. ...Capsicum peppers are from the Americas, black pepper and long pepper were expensive, European mediaevalards didn't really have a lot of spicy flavours to work with, so... I guess mustard was spicy for them?
Interestingly now a "queutard" in french slang is someone who uses his queue (=tail, slang for dick) a lot, or wants to at least.
I'm going to turn "wizard" back into an insult. Some smart-aleck tries to act bougie: "fuck off, wizard"
Pronounce it
/ˈwaɪzɝd/for added effect! Don't go overboard, though, or you may be called a custard.