girlthing

I mostly wish I could dream even bigger. If I could truly imagine a life better than this one - if I could see how it's possible to get there - then I'd have a lot more purpose in my life.

There'd still be a lot of cum and remorse, but at least I could make it mean something...

Speaking from experience, this culture is just as common outside the US, and outside Christianity too.

People with even halfway decent parents don't realise how lucky they are.

I have never heard a single song about being trans that's on ukelele. Anyone wanna help me fix that?

cuuuute

you're WRONG!!! and here are some reasons why you're wrong:

• you've had the strength to survive this long, despite the obvious hell you've been through. there is beauty in that, and if even i can see it, then you will see it one day
• despite all the pain, you've been kind and encouraging and caring in your interactions with people here. the right wants to rob us of our basic empathy and decency, and here you are defying them
• i love you, god damn it. you might think that's meaningless because i don't really know you, you may think i wouldn't love you if i knew you. you'd be wrong. believe it or not, every second you survive is precious to me

so stop being ur own hater!!!

Hi Una! I'm also a sad trans girl stuck in a transphobic environment, just fighting what feels like a losing battle to keep myself going somehow until I can hopefully see a future for myself one day.

With that unsolicited trauma dump out of the way - I don't log in that often, but know that I'll be rooting for you <3

tbh i feel almost exactly the same way (though i'm probably not enby).

she/her feels dangerous, because if i act or am treated as femme then the transphobes in my life might start to suspect me. they/them just feels totally wrong, it's not who i am. he/him at least feels safe, because it won't raise any suspicions...

AND just like you, gender is probably gonna be the least painful part of the next decade for me lol

Really, I do it because some snowflakes are too fragile to share their pronouns, and I enjoy annoying them until they do.

hello from a snowflake who is stuck in the closet, and too fragile to share my pronouns because it forces me to misgender myself and reminds me of how far i am from a life that feels like mine

i don't disagree with the they/them-by-default policy (principle of least harm etc), but if you ever find people being less than enthusiastic about it or reluctant to state their pronouns, please consider that there could be other reasons

i am, and always have been, both pictures simultaneously

"propa~~gand~~a"?

no antidepressants or therapists have ever been enough to heal the damage of a fucked up life

I feel this... been through several at this point, didn't really do much for me. I'd keep trying anyway, but I don't have access right now, so I'm just trying a bunch of stuff to see what will stick.

Right now I'm giving tonglen a shot. The hard part is getting myself to do it (hello, executive dysfunction!), but so far it seems to be helping a bit. (I recommend checking out that book either way, some interesting ideas in there)