geogeogeo

I also have religious trauma largely from being queer/trans in a religious family. My gender expression has generally been cisnormative so I don't have the same experience of someone who's more visibly gender nonconforming, but my internal gender experience I've come to learn is very much not cisnormative.

I was diagnosed with ASD and ADHD recently at age 29, but I had been self realizing the autism for years before, and before that I did a lot of work healing from what I understood to be CPTSD.

I can't diagnose a random internet stranger but if I could make money betting on this, I'd bet a lot that you are on the spectrum lol. And for many autists who are gender diverse, their autism and gender identity feel totally intertwined.

I would highly recommend reading Devon Price's book Unmasking Autism. It is very queer and trans inclusive.

I would also recommend reading Paul Walker's book on CPTSD. I've found it pretty helpful in a practical sense.

Before I read both those books, there was a book I found very helpful called I Know I'm in There Somewhere by Helene Brenner. While it's not about autism or PTSD, is cisheteronormative, and targeted toward women (and I wasn't even socialized as a woman), I still found it to be very powerful and it resonated a lot with me. I read it before I even really started self realizing ASD, and in retrospect a lot of the traumas it discusses from a lens of women in patriarchy also apply to autists in a NT world, or queers in a cisheteronormative world.

That's awesome. What stuff did you host, and did any stick out as being particularly well suited for running on a tablet? By that I mean especially efficient for the hardware, or if any were well suited for localhost access from the tablet (e.g. having an web UI well suited for tablet use).

In terms of my personal curiosities, I would say no BUT if you then went on to self host something from there I'd be interested in hearing about that.

I haven't yet. But just got diagnosed AuDHD at age 29, should be getting on a stimulant this week and I think that will help a lot.

This is atrocious. I don't know how those people can live with themselves. Or how they can so so quickly dehumanize another to justify to themselves the way they treat another human being. And how not uncommon that capacity is in our culture but especially in police and COs.

I'm all for finding a middle ground, which is why I will call it the Gulf of Canada, USA, and Mexico. Or Gulf of C.U.M. for short.

Some of these comments are way too straight for my gay ass to understand

Yes please rewrite all my documentation to actually make sense!

Thank you for saving me from future embarrassment.

Or just becoming terminal "um actually"-er like I've become with epoch

I recently had a psychological assessment that led to ASD and ADHD diagnoses. Part of it was intelligence testing and it led me to have some additional context I didn't have before. I always knew I was "smart" - at the very least I had the numerical data of always doing really well in school. As an adult I continued to have people tell me I was really smart, and my response was usually (internally) like "Sure, Jan" or "K" like, maybe in some ways but it seemed like kind of a pointless thing to think about. I've never felt any amount of superiority about being smart - my brain is what it is and I didn't really do anything to earn it so it seems weird to feel any certain way about it.

In my assessment, there were 6 intelligence factors that were measured. In 4 of them, I scored 95-98th percentile, one around 80th, but the last one I scored exactly average. That last one was processing speed. According to my assessor, it's more or less true that a brain wants to be similar levels across the board. Otherwise you basically have perceived bottlenecks in your processing. And I thought that was really interesting and resonated, because my brain can do some really cool things, but yeah it always feels like when it comes to actually articulating and thinking in certain ways, I basically have to slam the brakes. It was helpful to explain certain things, and apparently having a discrepancy with processing speed can be caused by unmedicated ADHD. I'm still unmedicated but hopefully that will change soon.

No idea what I'm trying to say about this. Maybe I just want to shout out to the void lol. But the meme definitely resonates. I guess I have some nuance in that, I agree with what I read to be the intent of the meme, that IQ is just a measurement that doesn't mean anything in a lot of ways. But this lense was new to me - that there are several axis of intelligence, and it's more typical that people are similar across all axes (whether low, high, or average), and spikiness on these axis can lead to dysregulation and other issues.

This is what I see from Lemmy.world

Ok I'm on board for a lot. But PARAGRAPH INDENTATION!? DOUBLE SPACES!? I can't with your blasphemy.