this post was submitted on 07 Mar 2025
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cross-posted from: https://lemm.ee/post/57579403

If anyone needs a transcript I'll write it.

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[–] [email protected] 98 points 1 month ago (9 children)

Free gravel. That's building material. You can always sell building material.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago (2 children)

But then you would never learn the secrets of the oysters.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago

secrets of the oysters.

Yo, this dirty ocean water be bussin'

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Pretty sure the only thing oysters will say to you is "fuck off".

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

I could make them talk.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

I cannot tell you how many ways free gravel for life would help me, but it’s definitely a lot

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Pun not intended

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[–] [email protected] 57 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Gravel is expensive if you're doing a lot of landscaping. I'll supply all of the entrepeneurs in the area and make a fortune.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (2 children)

For real, free gravel for life is the choice. You can start a gravel business and sell that shit. According to Google a 100ft driveway can cost upwards of $3k to gravel.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (2 children)

The real question is, does free gravel mean you can spawn gravel? Or buy it for free? Both require a good amount of logistical planning to take advantage of to build a gravel empire

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (2 children)

If you can spawn it, you technically have the solution to entropy, possibly also free energy.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

This.
Free gravel for life is OP! (probly gets nerfed in the next update)

[–] [email protected] 48 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Would need the details on some of these.

  • The empty container depends on the definition of "container" and "empty". If a house is a container for people it's easy to rob when empty. If you have to be looking at an airless vacuum it's dogshit. Otherwise I'm sure you could make money with a creative gambling scheme.
  • Gravel for life, like an infinite bucket full? Or the typical "for life" shit where you just get one trailer full dumped in your driveway every year for 60 years. Probably an overrated pick.
  • Teleporting is almost certainly the best pick. Is there a cool down? Do you keep momentum? Can it be in any direction? Does it take the same effort as walking? If you can spam it at the speed thought, you're now flying. Even with a CD you could be a world class athlete in a lot of sports. Or just do simple stuff like reach a high shelf or teleport out of handcuffs.
[–] [email protected] 42 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Or just do simple stuff like reach a high shelf or teleport out of handcuffs.

Teleporting out of you handcuffs also implies you'd lose your clothes every time you teleport.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago

Usually bodies are more than 7 inches wide, so you wouldn't end up naked, but with a t-shirt somewhere inside your body. So if it works like that, I'd advise you not to choose that pill. That is, unless you're an oyster.

[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Number three will get you through most all fences, walls, and locked doors. Become ungovernable.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Hopefully it's a7 inch gap, if it's 7 inches from center mass you're not really fully shifting position.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (8 children)

And the minute you do it wrong you’ve fused with a fence or a steel door or something and are probably dead so it would require a ton of practice to know your limits

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Gravel ofc. Just imagine being able to provide every construction site on earth with cheap gravel with no cost at all. I'd be the first billionaire on earth who didn't fuck other people over to be absurdly rich.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Thought the same thing but it doesn't say how the gravel is obtained. I assume there's still going to be transportation costs and "life" could be as short as how long it takes to be smothered by a heap of free gravel. I am suspicious.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Being able to see inside empty containers has its uses because you can always check if you can see into it and know something’s in it. Knowing IF something has contents can be plenty useful.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 month ago (2 children)

3 for sure. Depending on how teleporting into other objects works, and how fast you can spam it, you could get some serious work done with a power like that.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

yeah, #3 is a time machine if you can spam it faster than light can travel 7 inches

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago

Can I use .3 as some sort of short-range contiguous Alcubierre drive, by using it repeatedly very fast?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Number seven. And then piss off every "pea under shell" trickster, because you can see which shells are empty.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

I'll give you a hint, they're all empty.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

I shall abuse these toaster powers thoroughly and for my own amusement. Every toaster on the planet will go off at the same time!

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I'm torn. Kinda curious about what oysters are thinking, but pretty sure Einstein could run faster than me.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

I don’t think he can run very fast now though 🤔

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

Number 7 might let you cheat at some carnival/gambling games. Which of these 1000 boxes has the million dollars in it? The one I can't see through, of course!

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Can run as fast as Albert Einstein

Now, or when he was alive?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

A manga artist would find a way to make one of these the most op power in their entire universe. "I can fill anyones lungs with gravel with just a thought" or " i teleported 5 cms into you and severed a nerve in your spine that paralyzes you for life"

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

Teleporting 7 inches still sounds kinda badass, would be very useful in a fight or you could just stand and repeatedly teleport to recreate that OK GO video.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (4 children)

3 or 7.

Doesn't mention any cooldown on the teleport so I could probably spam it which would make it useful.

7 sounds stupid but it could be actually useful in some situations.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

How does the free gravel thing work? Can I just summon it in a location of my choice? Or is there a guy who delivers it to me?

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

If I grow a second nose, will it also be stuffed up? If so, I choose teleportation. I know it's only 7 inches but that's enough to get around most doors so it's still useful.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

I COULD DO SO MUCH MORE COCAINE WITH ANOTHER NOSE

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

cureently doing a massive landscape job, then moving to a friend's place for same and putting in a bunch of paving. free gravel pls

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

3 will get you past most any locked door or fence.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Only if you are thinner than 7" minus the thickness of the door. Otherwise, you would teleport right into the door, which (I assume) might be quite painful.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Speaking a dead language would be cool. Maybe teach it to others and read into the history, etymology and people of it. Talk to historians and what not.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I feel as though there is money making opportunity in 8. The language is dead? Nobody alive who can speak the language, so I'd have more or less free reign to profit off of being the only person who could speak it.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Please, someone tell me where I can find a full Sub of these! I love these so much.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

There's no rule saying I can't pick more than one so

2, 3, 5, 6, 7, 8

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